The Whump Fan’s Dilemma

Whenever people bring up the "can X character beat Goku?" hypothetical, it always revolves around modern DB power, like SSJ4 and Ultra Instinct, which makes sense since theyre the recent top tier power levels in a shonen sense. but the fact is, Goku aint been at his A-game since OG DB. Since like, you gotta remember, Dragonball started as another Toriyama gag manga, similar to Dr Slump.

Goku is a gag character who transitioned to a shonen fighter since fighting was more fun.

THAT is terrifying. Goku can still apply to gag manga rules if he wants to. Bullets have no effect on him, but he will scream in agony if you hit him with a small rock.

Goku is like an anime Hannah Montana, best of both worlds, a jack of all trades. He can be a cheery funny gag character when he wants, and a serious fighting protagonist when he wants. Like, one of his most famous fighting styles is biting people. He bites Frieza, he bites Buu, he bites Beerus, he bites Whis.

Goku is one of the strongest fighters in all of anime, he can take the punch of a God, or all the condensed evil in hell and not even flinch, but his wife Chi Chi, Bulma and Arale can whoop his ass because its funny.

Basically the answer to any "can X character beat Goku?" revolves around the answer "would it be funny?"

Thanos from MCU? There's nothing funny there at all, Thanos loses.

SpongeBob? Incredibly funny, SpongeBob would blow a bubble that looks like a bus at Goku and he'd be launched back past the horizon and you'd see a nuclear explosion happen.

And like the most stereotypical ones of Saitama and Luffy, thats like a draw, they all have the half and half of shonen and funny. They beat the shit out of eachother and then the next scene is them bandaged and bruised in an Applebee's chowing down on endless appetizers together, then immediately back to fighting.

i’m going to go on a small rant about dragon ball super Goku

so the first ever dragon ball show i watched was dragon ball super cause at that time all i had was a school chromebook and an illegal website (😭) which had very limited anime to watch.

they only had dragon ball super. no dragon ball, dragon ball z or gt. so yeah, i started off getting into the dbz fandom by watching the worst series in the entire franchise (according to other people)

at the beginning i was super confused, like, “what?? he has a son? a wife?? two sons?? am i missing something?” but i pushed through and i absolutely fell in love with dbs.

it was that series that got me into dragon ball and everything, and i have a huge amount of respect towards it. it has some pretty good arcs, especially the TOP arc. but as i went back towards the beginning, watched og db and dbz, i started to realize that dbz Goku was not the same as dbs Goku.

Goku. isn’t. stupid.

well yeah, he’s still kinda dumb (and i find that absolutely adorable), but not to the point where he doesn’t understand the most basic concepts of anything that isn’t fighting.

i refuse to believe that his level of understanding is that of like a 5 year old toddler.

so to make super a bit more bearable, i have a little headcanon.

Goku just acts dumb because he finds everyone’s reactions hilarious.

like in ep 42, where Beerus disguises himself as Monaka (probably filler but still), i like to think he pretended not to know that Beerus was actually in the costume and internally had a wheezing fit seeing the destroyer put on an uncomfortable outfit.

actually, i think he just went along with the entire “Monaka is the strongest warrior i’ve ever fought” thing because it’s funny seeing Beerus panic

also Chichi’s probably in on his little secret too.

Mentre leggevo un po' e mi perdevo nei ricordi, mi son imbattuto in uno che mi ha fatto ridere adesso come allora.

Metro di Napoli, direzione Fuorigrotta.

Due ragazzi seduti affianco a me discutono:

A: oh, te si' sturiat aaa relazione ee Grassmann??

B: chiiiii?

A: GRASSMANN!!!

B: ....(faccia perplessa)...

A: ma comm, chill ca' serv pe' calcola' aaa dimension!!

B: AAA DIMENSION????

Al che, spazientito e molto irritato per la palese ignoranza del collega e per il fatto che non avesse studiato, nonostante all'inizio avesse affermato il contrario, si alza all'inpiedi, mani a V sul pube, ed esclama:

EEE, A DIMENSION EE STU' CAZZ!

Ovviamente i vicini di posto, tra cui io, che facevano fatica a trattenere una risata.

“we need to teach media literacy in schools” guys was i really the only person paying attention in english class bffr

love him