Clint: I Don’t Think We Can Mansplain, Manipulate Or Malewife Our Way Out This One.

babygirl there is something obviously wrong with your brain

we need some mediocre nat fluff now to hear us from that stab in the heart fic

gotchu baby

content warnings: nsfw i sprinkled in some porn so, as usual peak mediocrity

she brings white claw to meet ur friends<3 and youre like i set a low bar for you and youre playing limbo with it. and yet ur friends are like so impressed by her because shes an avenger and she just smirks at you over the table

you ask her why she doesnt speak russian to you regularly and shes like well u dont speak clown to me regularly? and u whack her stomach but she just pulls u in for a hug and ur like ur so annoying but u kiss her anyway

when u go for a walk w her through the park and u see an ice cream truck ur like go buy us a cone and shes like wtf why dont U buy it bitch and ur like u wear the strap, u pay the bill

shes just like :| but goes and pays for it anyway but before u can even take a bite of it, she eats the whole thing and shes like yeah look i need the energy, i burn so much of it putting up w ur ass

you rolling ur eyes: you love putting my ass up

nat: very true<3

sometimes u take naps in her office and she comes in and wakes u up and is like come eat me out under my table and ur like ??? u didnt even say hi bro tf but like ur a slut so yeah

sometimes u show up to bring her lunch so she makes a joke about how its reciprocal: she eats something and u eat something

when halloween rolls around and they have those fake decorations, u buy a bag of spiders and u find her at the gym and u throw them at her and ur like "for halloween im you, i attack people with my spider bullshit" she gets u in the ring and slams you on ur back and ur like "i still dont regret doing that" and she sits on your waist, straddling u and rolls her eyes but shes smiling fondly down at u and she kisses u and then grabs ur face and says Get the fuck out. and youre like no<3 and she says And stop visiting me at work. and youre like No<3

nat and her cock gag<3 when u dont stop irritating her she tells u to open up baby, spits in ur mouth, shoves it in, and pats ur cheek twice, says ur so much more bearable like this

when ur nice to her she'll let u braid her hair so she'll sit cross legged on the floor while netflix is on and u play w her hair and sometimes you'll yank her head back by the braid for a kiss and she doesn't say anything about it until it comes time for a spank lmao she counted.

she will show up at ur job too, hand u a wrap or a sandwich she bought for like $3 and then talk u into making out in her car or in a storage closet, every time u leave the other hanging -- either ur break is over or she has to go or smth

u send her memes about being a boomer and she says shut up and ur like ok cradle robber. she says u like me w a cane. u tell her ur looking at her respectfully bc u always respect ur elders. she dresses up as steve for Halloween and tells u its because shes dressing her age. and by steve i mean she just wears a tight shirt and flexes all the time. u have no complaints

at the pool she pushes u in and ur like I'm drowning i need mouth to mouth and she obliges because she saves lives u know<3

ok soft gfs sometimes when shes out of the country you'll call her and ur sleepy bc its weird timezones and ur like pls be safe. come back soon. and nats like side eying her coworkers bc they cannot see her emote like this so shes like "um yes i like mac n cheese" and ur like "and thats i love you in repressed russian spy right?" and shes turning around to face a wall and smiling and going "yes it is" and when she comes home u hand her a microwave mac n cheese and she kisses u at the door and u tell her so sweetly that shes washing all the dishes from the past week bc she cannot skimp out on chores and shes like sure ok but i have a lot of laundry for u to do:) don't get stuck again. Or do. i don't mind

inspired by tiktok for ur anniversary u both agree not to buy each other gifts but ur bored one day and make a macaroni frame and u put in a picture of u both and ur like Sike i got a gift for u <3 and shes panic buying shit like brand name clothes, make up, a brand new sex toy, and ur like ......nat i literally just got u this.

shes so unimpressed she says shes going to return everything u don't deserve ANYTHING but she lets u kiss her jaw and her cheek and her lips and u tell her thank u baby and ur like :) ily and shes like ok fine.

mediocre nat is really just a simp ngl

title: mcromance

notes: sfw mediocre gfs fluff, its date night, will i ever write the shit i promised? jury’s still out

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AO3 reader: leaves a sweet comment and is enthusiastic about my fic

Me, cradling their face in my hands: I would fight god for you

OLDER MOB NAT! AND HER YOUNG (FRESH GRAD) INNOCENT! R WHO WORKS AS HER ASSISTANT IN THE OFFICE.

warning: older!nat, younger!reader, mob boss, age gap relationships. SFW

When Natasha entered the room with you in tow, your hairs travelled to the sway of her hips. You couldn’t help but blush at the sight of your boss’ curves, feeling inappropriate at the way you ogled her like she was your girlfriend.

But her dark voice broke you out of her little reverie as she finally say behind her desk, blazer unbuttoned just as she shirt, just enough to give you a glimpse of her lace bra and the purple hickeys that adored the plump of her chest.

“Just set it down here, hon.”

You nodded, blushing at her pet name your boss gave you. And despite it all, you were warm all over as you leaned over her desk and organized the paper of the revenue of her club.

“Are you all set, Miss Romanoff?” You asked her softly before you decided to leave, your back straight and posture perfect as you stood in front of her. “Anything else I can get you?”

She shook her head, eyes settled on the papers in front of you. She didn’t bat an eye at you, only hummed and when you nodded, you picked your feet from the floor and headed towards the door.

“Actually,” she started, “there’s one thing you forgot, dear. Come back.”

Your heart pummeled out of your chest, fear settling in your bones at the thought of fucking up some of her paperwork and accidentally leaving it unorganized.

But when the mob boss stood from her chair and walked around her desk to sit against it, she smiled as you neared her presence once again.

She cocked her head, eyes settled into yours.

“You think I wouldn’t remember?”

You frowned, eyes shaded in shame at her words.

“I knew you were busy, Natty.”

Natasha clicked her tongue and then shook her head, eyes heavy as she looked at you. When you refused to look back, her hand reached out and tilted your head up to force your gaze onto her.

“I’m never too busy for you, hon.” Her thumb grazed the apples of your cheeks and then dragged them over the slope of your nose. A flush snuck up on your face and the older woman grinned. When Natasha leaned closer and caressed her nose against yours, you took initiative and gave her crimson lips a peck.

The woman pulled back with a raised brow, her emerald eyes wide and dark as she looked at you with surprise.

“You’re getting bold, sweetheart.” She squeezed your cheek together. Then, after letting a moment pause, she smiled and closed the gap to press her lips against yours. With the taste of cigarettes and coffee present on her tongue, it envelopes you with surprise. The older woman teases your mouth open and even widens the kiss enough.

The sounds echo in the room, almost pornographic, you’re the first to pull away when you lack air.

“Don’t forget to bring me the manila folders when you come in for your lunch break, okay?” You nodded at her demand. After all, above everything else, she was still your boss at work. At home, in the comfort of her million dollar condo in the heart of New York, she was Natty, your girlfriend.

Shelter From The Storm

Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Word Count: 1.6K

A/N - Starting a new Wanda series, set directly after Lagos.

You heard the thunder of footsteps before you saw the oncoming crowd. You stilled at the exterior gate of your apartment buildings’s shared courtyard. You caught sight of the oncoming sprawl of press, reporters and camera flashes that you’d never seen in this sleepy town before. Then, you heard what they were yelling and you realised that you were standing in the path of an oncoming mob.

And at the front, like a fox in a hunt, ran a red headed girl.

The panic was evident in her eyes, even at a distance. Time sped up as the mob approached you and the girl fled towards where you stood. You realised that, inevitably, your action or inaction was now going to matter.

The girl was gaining some distance on the crowd in her impossible attempt to shake them, benefitting from her ability to better weave and dodge oncoming pedestrians.

It gave you the few seconds that you needed.

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You be out here making me soft😭 This is really sweet, I appreciate it💕🥺

HAPPY FANFIC WRITERS APPRECIATION DAY!!!!!

I want to thank all of you wonderful writers that share your amazing works with us. I hope that you all know how much happiness & joy that you have given to me & I’m sure so many others. Getting to read your fantastic stories have put so many smiles on my face & have made my days so much brighter. I’m sending out love to all of you, REALLY THANK YOU ALLL FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART!!!! You are all FABULOUS!!!!! Here are some of the terrific writers that I have read from this past year,

@thorfanficwriter @what-is-your-plan-today @bolontiku @tilltheendwilliwrite @wordynerdygurl @sweater-daddiesdumbdork @sagechanoafterdark @jewels2876 @jobean12-blog  @that-damn-girl @jay-and-dean @roonyxx @denisemarieangelina  @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @the–sad–hatter

@americancowgirl19 @anathewierdo @angrythingstarlight @beccaanne814 @beyondspaceandstars @bitsandbobsandstuff @bonkywobble​ @buckstaybucky​ @buckybarnesdiaries @buckycuddlebuddy @buckysknifecollection @bugsbucky @callmeluna​ @carryonmywaywardcaptain​ @chevyharvelle @crispychrissy @cuddles-with-bucky @datfandombitch @elatedmarvel @fandom-basurero @fangirlovestuff @hannahshattuck @helloimanavenger @high-functioning-lokipath @honeyloverogers​ @howlingmedic @imagine-assembling-the-avengers @imaginedreamwrite @imagining-supernatural @just-the-hiddles @katymacsupernatural @ladytodd @lokibug  @loki-hargreeves​  @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @luci-in-trenchcoats​ @magellan-88 @marvelgirl7 @mostly-marvel-musings @navybrat817 @original-wintersoldier @percywinchester27 @plus-size-reader  @samwilsons-pillowpecs @shield-agent78 @shy-violet-soul @smediumsmeatbae @specialagentlokitty @spinsterlocity-writes @starlight-loki @starlightcrystalline @supernaturallymarvelous  @sunflowerxbarnes @sunriserose1023 @talesmaniac89 @thatfangirl42 @the–blackdahlia @the-emo-asgardian @theycallmebecca @tuiccim @thinkinghardhardlythinking  @twittytelly @vodka-and-some-sass @waiting4inspiration @waywardnerd67 @whisperlullaby @world-of-aus @writingfromkitchenator @writingsoftheloser  @why-did-i-write-this @xbuchananbarnes

And I hope that if you haven’t check out their work you do, I’d highly recommend them & so many others on here. It would take forever to list all the wonderful & talented writers on here, but I really want to thank each & every one of you that post on here, because you have given me so much joy!!! All of

And I love & appreciate you all so much🤗🤗🥰🥰😍😍❤️❤️!!!!! 

CAPTAIN MARVEL (2019) + Letterboxd, as requested by anonymous (insp.)

Sea Turtles Have Stage Fright || Natasha Romanoff

Fandom: MCU - Black Widow 2021 time period [no spoilers]

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Summary: Natasha loves, respects and adores you. But when it comes to your sleep talking, she can't help but play along and see what you have to say.

A.N: I didn't know I was going to be trying fictober this year given my current headspace so dont be surprised if this is my only contribution this year lol. And I for sure don't even know if I'm gonna officially write for mcu cause... yeah, but I still wanted to try this! Specifically cause I was inspired and also every time I have a desire to read Natasha fics, or literally any other adult wlw x reader it's smut and I just want some fluff 😔 no disrespect to people who enjoy that ofc! Edit: and dammit, this is late. Oh well, I tried :/

Fictober Prompt: "what did I say?"

Warnings: my first [possibly only??] time writing marvel, let alone Natasha. Also Google translate, I'm so sorry Russian speakers [moya lyubov' = my love]

The trip out seemed longer this time around.

Maybe it was the fact Natasha was hardwired to wake before the asscrack of dawn and the hard-to-see roads made the drive seem like a chore— Her eyes land on the empty passenger seat like a knee-jerk response before jumping back to the road. —Or maybe it was the lack of company.

Last Natasha left you, you were half asleep in your shared queen bed, lips parted in the beginnings of a snore and your reach meeting an empty mattress. Between the two of you, you were always the heavier sleeper. Not that she minded, in situations like these — ie, a lot of time on her hands — it gave her more downtime. And there was a lot of that these days it would seem.

The rhythmic tick-tock-tick of the right turn signal overlapped the squeak of rubber being pulled across the glass with the wipers as she sat waiting. Her mind was full and racing, her heart heavy since she killed the radio going on about the Avenger's breakup. Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson still on the run — that was all she needed to know. They were safe. And all she wanted now was to forget about unpacking the groceries in the back seat and getting straight back into bed with you, crawling under the covers, and forget her troubles.

Natasha found herself wondering the same thing she often did when she found a moment alone these days; would the two of you still be able to have the life you always wanted together? Sure, you were getting to see the world but you were still in hiding after all.

The question kept her occupied the rest of the drive and to no surprise, the trailer Mason had secured for you two was still standing when she returned. Her eyes swept the area as she yanked the keys from the ignition, all the more eager to return inside. The cold was seeping through her jacket and down her neck, and the morning air smelled of dew and if she listened hard enough she could make out the sounds of the stream nearby. The trailer wasn't much warmer — the puny excuse for a backup generator did little to run everything, including the heater even in overtime — but this made the return to bed more tantalizing.

Dropping the keys and grocery bags on the counter — and doing another routine sweep of all her carefully placed silent alarms — Natasha finally gave in to temptation and headed back for the hallway. She knew she wouldn't fall back to sleep, but god, was she dead tired.

She winced internally at the creak of the door but knew better than to worry; sure enough, you were still fast asleep just as she left you. Expertly entangled in the many layers of quilts and thicken linen — your limbs woven in and out not even she could wrestle you out of — and deep in sleep. A smile crept onto her lips and she rolled her eyes, slipping off her shoes and jacket before taking a seat on her side of the bed.

How the hell had you become such an important piece of her life? She wondered fondly.

"Bedhog," she grumbled despite the smile, slipping herself under your arm and back into what she could salvage of her side of the mattress.

"Mm-hmm,"

Her brows shot up a bit in surprise and as best as she could without moving, she angled her head to get a good look at your sleeping face inches from her pillow. Had you heard her? Her little bed hog slept through just about everything.

"Wait..." you plea, your eyes still closed and your brows furrowed in a pressing manner.

Her smirk tripled in size. Oh no, this was much better than you waking.

"...no, don't." You said, growing angry at whatever force in your dreams you were facing.

Years of sharing the same bed with you and Natasha had long since accepted she would never know what to expect. Dreaming Y/n, for example, has taught her vital tidbits and life lessons like; don't put cereal in your purse, and also sea turtles have stage fright. Oh, how Nat longed for the days she could capture these moments on her phone and keep them forever. Another disadvantage to living off the grid.

"Don't what, my love?" She cooed in a voice lower than a whisper. She lovingly glid the pads of her fingertips across the back of your hand laying on her stomach, careful not to pull your too much from sleep but enough to get your attention.

"He..." you took a deep breath, one Natasha's amusement hinged on as she waited for you to continue.

Natasha didn't want to jump to conclusions but she also didn't want you to be suffering through any unpleasant dreams either. She had gotten you to talk like this before, she just needed a little more...

"He what?"

You were fighting so hard to tell her — to fight through your subconscious and relay to her whatever message you needed to about what this dastardly He was putting you through. You were growing more and more upset, your face contorting and twitching with anger and your voice tight and upset.

"He ate my birthday cake,"

A soft scowl came to her face as she brushed a stray hair from yours, tracing her knuckles down your jawline. "He didn't!"

"Mmm,"

"Who's this bastard, moya lyubov?"

You didn't answer, she had put too much in it and you were slipping back under. She waited only a moment and asked again, trying not to laugh.

"What happened, Y/n?"

Your expression hardened again, clearly distraught at the mention.

"Pope Francis ate my birthday cake,"

...Okay. That was a new one.

⊹ ⊹ ⊹

You awoke to the smell of ground coffee and frying eggs; you could smell the aroma wafting in from the small kitchenette before you even opened your eyes and you knew Natasha was up. Arching your back you gave your arms and legs a long stretch, your balled fists digging into your girlfriend's pillow as you let out a yawn.

Eager to join her, you slipped out of bed and pulled on a nearby hoodie draped over a chair, making your way out. Your bare feet stuck to the cold wooden floors as you padded in, squinting against the light of day to see Natasha at the stove.

"Morning hot stuff," she quipped, flipping her eggs and taking a sip from her mug of coffee. You hummed a groggy laugh, knowing full well you looked as if you crawled out of hibernation — not far from the truth — but you knew she meant it anyway.

"Morning," you passed over her shoulder and gave a peck on the cheek before trudging over to the fridge and pulling it open for a once over. "Thanks for getting groceries,"

"Eh," she shrugged. "I couldn't go back to sleep. Gave me something to do."

You looked over your shoulder, grabbing a protein shake and closing the fridge. "I'm sorry. You should have woke me up, I would have kept you company,"

Natasha smiled down at the eggs cooking in the pan before reaching over and killing the stove, moving them to another burner as she retrieved a bowl. "Oh, no, I couldn't do that." She smirked.

You paused mid-sip, growing suspicious. You knew Natasha all too well and that shit-eating smirk meant she had something over you. "...what? What is it?"

"I didn't say anything, moya lyubov,"

Your eyes thined in a scowl. "What, Nat, just tell me,"

"But I don't want to further ruin your birthday fun,"

"Birthday? It's not my birthday--" your face dropped and you slammed the drink on the counter beside you in realization. "Oh no,"

Natasha didn't say anything, but all the confirmation you got was the loving, but knowing look of mischief in her eyes as she peered at you over her sip of coffee. It was all you needed to know. You were sleep-talking again. It always brought out a teasing side to her that you not so secretly loved. What you didn't love was the embarrassment that came with it.

"Alright, let's hear it," you sighed, folding your arms over your chest and smiling tiredly. "what did I say?"

Flashing a conceding smile, Natasha placed her steaming mug and bowl of eggs on the counter beside her before crossing the kitchen to wrap you in a harrowing embrace.

"My darling," she began. Her tone would have worried you if you weren't used to how dramatic she got when she was teasing. She wrapped her strong arms around you and tucked herself into you in a protective manner. "never again will the dastardly Pope Francis steal your birthday cake or any celebratory desserts for that matter. I will make sure of it."

You let a weak laugh, burying your face in her hug and her arms snaked further around you. You could practically see the grin widening on her face to mirror yours as the dream came back to you in bits. Pulling back, you met her gaze — her hazel green eyes full of love — and your lips met in a warm, chaste kiss.

"My hero,"

Captivity

Summary: The Avengers think they know the reader, but a mission gone wrong proves they really don’t

Pairing: So I wrote this as a platonic Avengers & Reader but then it could also be seen as Natasha x Reader, so read it however you’d prefer.

Word Count: 4700

A/N: I really like this one, it was fun to write at least. Also I have some fics pre-written already like this but I really have no time to write, so I’ll see how often I can, I don’t want to go through them too fast.

———————————————————–

You’d met Pepper at a coffee shop. It was a temporary job as a barista, but it was a bit of money while you were at college. Of course heads turned when the CEO of Stark Industries walked in, ordering a cake and two coffees. In fact, the only reason you served her was because your co-workers were too busy being star struck, whispering bets on whether Tony Stark himself would walk in later; you thought it unlikely.

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