Sooooo My School Docs Acct Kinda Weird
Sooooo my school docs acct kinda weird
i checked my school acct and went 2 google docs and the second thing the showed up was a doc called "a song i wrote at 3 in the morning after a mental breakdown" this is what was in the doc: well i’m tired of this earth, this hell hole we call home, i don’t even know, why we’ll never choose to go, and that’s including me, because i’ll never fucking leave, even if it’s too expentise, just to fucking breathe, but at the same time i wanna go, just disappear, never come home, so not even god can find me, i’ll be so far off the grid, they’ll think i never even existed, like i was a mass hallucination, and that they were all just sick, and i’ll be gone so freaking fast, that my shadow will always last, as a spill of darkness across the floor, so if you’re talking to me, and suddenly you have to grieve, i just have one message right before i leave, “i don’t want you t ofeel alone, i just want you to go home, safely without cutting out your spleen, i just wanted to do what i do, without the jugdement of you, I’d tell you to go to hell but i’m probably going there to”, so, leave me alone, let me rot by myself, i don’t want you by my side, and if you don’t go off alone, than i’ll never fucking die, when hell freezes over and the sun explodes, than maybe i’ll go off and die, when Twitter is crying and babies are dying, and we’re all choked with pesticides, than maybe i’ll die, but what about you? will you come with me, or will you get to watch this world freeze, or will it burn? i don’t know, i haven’t been here before, this is my first time seeing the ocean reflect me, why would i care if you’re a boy, girl, or something in between? when my own body, is decaying as we speak, i’m like a rotting apple, my skin peeling, liver’s failing, guts are melting and i don’t even taste like i’m well, my expiration date has passed, everything i do is half-assed, you tell me your opinion as if i even fucking asked, and while my bones have breaking, they’re filled with candies and some tapings, of old disney movies that i always used to watch, they’ve aged like old milk, like a lemonade stained knitted quilt, i’ll put them in my will for the person i hate most, so that everybody else will get to brag and to boast, about the cool stickers they got, the flowers beginning to rot, while you’ll sitting there alone, watching snowwhite and her dwarfs, unable to speak as your mouth’s getting sew closed, and while your eyes are getting filled with old pocket watches and painpills, i’ll be telling people to come over, and while my uterus is rotting, like old candies in even older stockings, we’ll all tell you it’s now better, we’ll all tell you it was worst before and we’re not even lying, because before it was totally legal to ignore your young children crying, and while the rest of us’ll be dying, cause you thought you could fly, the ocean levels will rise, and we’ll all want to live and we all want to die, and yes mr. president, we want to be both.
pls don't ask idk when i wrote this
More Posts from Saucedxll and Others
what was MEANT to be a "quick sketch"
okay so the context for this is i originally meant to make a quick drawing with colour but i lost ALL of my progress so i decided to just make a easy sketch w/ no colour, but then i thought the wall look empty and y'know what you do when i wall is empty, you fill it with an ungodly amount of painting and pictures that's what you do, also i was watching dead meat and film theory so i thought {insert matpat saying LOOOOOOOORE} was an absolute necessity so if you look at all the paintings (and how they interact with the characters below) you might notice somethings that stick out and some {insert matpat saying LOOOOOOOORE}, also in the biggest painting i used the oil painting called The Fallen Idol by John Collins and a dark academia room from pinterest and modified it a little bit
here's the room if you're wondering: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/358176976656603890/
also i added four new OCs, which means i need to include the ♪𝑶𝑪 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚♪ so
the small little thingy in Ome's arms: his name is jimythy (yes i tried to spell the name timothy but how it showed and combined with jimmy) and i didn't really think about his connection with Ome but what he lacks in friendship he makes up for in {insert matpat saying LOOOOOOOORE}, so originally he was actually a human man named Timothy Bloodhart, he was a greedy banker from the early 1930s (in Texas btw) but he flew to close to the sun once the townsfolk finally found out that he had been taking some of their money (he also had connections to the major btw, idk if this is important but just gonna mention this), so in short freddy kurger style while he was in his mansion the town gathered around his house following one man who had had the most stolen for him by Bloodhart, the man (Iglesias Abdero-Alfonso) was holding a bottle of alcohol with a ripped shirt on fire shoved into the bottle, he threw the bottle into his window through the room he was sleeping in (the living room) and he was passed out drunk so he didn't wake up when the bottle went through the window or once he started to catch fire, he died in the hospital. After he died he fell in this room that kinda looks like a room ENTIRELY covered in carpet, the floor, the walls, even the ceiling, there's nothing else there other than a pile of folders in the corner of the room, he goes over to read it only to find out that in the folder is all the people he stole from, their names, ages, gender, birthdate, things they liked and didn't like, the name of their closest relatives (like parents, siblings, 1st cousins, etc) and the amount of money he stole from them, all the folders had one sheet with all of that and the rest of the folder (around 50-60 pages) was the person's entire life, there's was over 100 of these folder, he, in guilt, throws the folders away before going over to the other side of the room, as he was leaning against the wall he felt the opening of a door, he opened it to find a seemingly endless hallway and once he got to the end of the hall everything went white, once he woke up he was the thing you see him as, a very small fox (i think but i want to base a character off of foxgloves soooo i guess the colour version gonna be cool).
the rabbit next to Teddison: her name is delilah (didn't want to name her bon because the too obvious but i thought "bon, bon, delilah bon, delilah!") and she's pretty much exactly like teddison (y'know because he's a break from the loredump that's the rest of the characters are, and thank GOD that tumblr doesn't have a word limit in descriptions) and if you saw my last post a.k.a the coloured one then you know that the star on his belly is actually his mouth, so those stars on her are multiple mouths, also L E A F.
the small creature in between teddison and delilah: his name is Abercio (totally not out of ideas for names) and he's kinda just there, i bases him off of flaky from HTF (happy tree friends) but as a man i guess idk, he's a teen btw (15) and teddison and delilah are like adopted parents to him, he doesn't remember anything before meeting the two, but you wanna know who's does, me :), his parents were both killed in a freak accident in the mall when he was 7, idk the details exactly but like those videos where an escalate opens up and kills someone, so he ran away from the foster home after getting relentlessly bullied and was homeless for the next 6 years before teddison and delilah found him.
the thing next to delilah: his name is snek, he's the comic relief of the group even though he's mute, he just snoots around eating random things and pushing vases off counter tops (kinda like a cat), he also really likes the duck song, tight pant/body rolls, grapes (the food), gamblecore and the 1st lego movie.
oc i made
oc lore: ok so, ome isn't actually a bunny, he's a wolf disguised as a bunny, like wolf in sheep's clothing but w/ a bunny, that dusty blue on his knees and tail is his actually skin colour, the skin he's wearing started to tear at the knees so he cut it to look like a weird fur pattern, and his tail is his real tail but he cut it to look more like a bunny tail, his eyes and smile is so big because he his to big for the skin he is wearing, he bent his thigh to make hisself look small, did the same to his calf and cut off his lower shin and feet into shape to look more like a bunny, he's the opposite of emo (hence the name ome) where instead of being sad and wanting to k!ll hisself he's actually really happy and wants to k!ll others, also his favorite food is grapes.
found this on pinterest and decided to draw it
i was on pinterest and decided to flex on ai because again it could never *insert smug rich man laugh*
also heres the original post on pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/1014435884806823017/
btw if you want to follow me on my pinterest, youtube and/or deviantart here's the links:
also if you're wondering about the logo "ale-lyen" it's my user on deviantart
is this just me orrrrrrrr?
when i sign in to my account i open all my tabs and put them in a certain order, it goes: youtube, textnow, deiviantart,kleki and/or pinterest, tumblr & the wikipedia page of every body piercing in that order, sometimes i don't add the wikipedia page but all the others have to be opened at all times in that order
i do the same with art programs, when i open kleki, if my drawing needs it i make all the layers and label them
is this weird? i did this in front of my brother and my said i was weird, the same brother who only open twos tabs: youtube and arras.io and plays this while sitting on the couch with moving and cursing quiet enough that my mom doesn't hear him
is this weird?
look what i made
got bored on like something night, idk what day it is and haven't since summer started, my mom has some crochet potholders so obviously i frogged it and made it into this guy :3 and three granny squares for a different WIP also totally not letting him lay on my arm so i'm typing w/ one hand he's a beaver btw
𝓛𝓲𝓷 (lazy drawing ik)
"you're in bed with puffy eyes scrolling through your ex's socials, it's been raining all day & around 2 AM a weather advisory was put out warning citizens to stay inside, so you've been stuck inside the house with nothing to do and no one to talk with, while scrolling you stumble across a pic of them with someone else, the caption? "my new Juliet" you slam your phone down on your nightstand before tucking yourself in you pile of blankets and pillows, a couple hours pass and since you haven't eaten anything all day, you finally get up to go to the kitchen, you set you foot day before immediately picking it back up, you look over to see your favorite flowers scattered across the floor, along with pages to what you guess to be romance novels, you go downstairs only to see your stairs lined with vases full of bright red and yellow carnations, once downstairs you look over to your normally empty dinning room table now covered with a pile of heart boxes filled with your favorite chocolates, you go to your kitchen to see the floor smothered with rose petals, a beautiful dress in your favorite colour on the table, and someone in a crochet blanket, "do you like it?" he asked "yes of course, who, who are you?" he sticks out his thin, lifeless, chard hand out for a handshake, you sit down, give him a handshake and introduce yourself, you don't know him other than his name being lin, but you don't mind, you might let him stay for a while"
btw this is a redo of a drawing: https://youtu.be/1_VcW0vByEQ
KANDI
what 2024 my sketchbook pages look like:
idk if u noticed but pretty much all my sketchbook notes are in cursive, and alotta ppl say they can't read my cursive so:
top one: me trying my absolute best outta my comfort zone
the one under the top one: my attempt at drawing a muscle bound (person) because i only draw curvy latina's
next to the 2nd: teethling (not that one)
the bottom one: you're a bo burnham (totally spelled that wrong) fan aren't you?
above the last one: how can you tell?
and yes, that's red guy & john's (the muscle bound dude w/ a pink ":D" face) an OC
