I AM THE GOD OF TRASH!!

Alright, I've seen some debates on this, but I want to settle this question once and for all!

For reference:

You've been isekai'd into a fictional setting. Spin this wheel to find out which one.

I absolutely love this!! 🤣

I can't pass up on an opportunity to inject a little bit of eldritch Merlin propaganda into this!

Arthur asks Merlin if his appearance is a disguise, and Merlin kinda hesitates and says something along the lines of "well, it's not a disguise, but it's not exactly my true form either." Arthur freaks out a bit over this, but Merlin reassures Arthur that his true form isn't some wrinkly old man, and Arthur calms down a bit. However, Arthur is still curious about what Merlin's true form looks like.

From there, Arthur starts pestering Merlin to reveal his true face. It take multiple months, but Arthur never gets Merlin to agree to willingly show his true form.

However, there's been a bit of a miscommunication. Merlin assumes that Arthur knows that he's Emrys, magic incarnate, and that his true form won't even look remotely human. Arthur, on the other hand, is expecting Merlin's true form to look like some sort of elf or faerie.

So you can imagine Arthur's shock when, during a fight with a powerful enemy sorcerer, Merlin's human body starts glowing, and then his skin begin to crack, as if the light emanating from within him is trying to claw its way out. Arthur looks on in horror as Merlin's human form completely breaks apart, revealing an eldritch horror so frightening and so powerful that his mind refused to comprehend it, and when he thought back on the events, there was simply a void in space where the unknowable creature that was Merlin had been.

Arthur, who just witnessed something that would normally break a mortal's mind: ...

Arthur: Well I can see why Merlin chose a pretty face if THAT's what he actually looks like.

Arthur: ... He's still kinda hot like that tho.

I just love this idea lol!

After Merlin's confession on being a sorcerer

Merlin: *terrified* why aren't you saying anything?

Arthur: you know that old woman who impersonated lady helen?

Merlin: *slowly* yeah?

Arthur: she was really old and scrumbly and stuff, right?

Merlin: .... Rrrrright?

Arthur: and she made herself good looking to trick my father-

Merlin: technically, she just assumed a familiar face.

Arthur: you're not doing that, are you?

Merlin: do what? Assume a familiar face?

Arthur: you're not making yourself look better than you are, do you? You're not like - tempting me like some kind of fae with their fae powers and seduction techniques! I won't be able to rip your face off and there is an ugly old man behind it, right?

Merlin: ... Arthur, do you think Ive been seducing you?

Arthur: *realizing* - actually, do please be an old and ugly man behind that face so this doesn't sound like I've had a crush on you for years?

Merkin: what?

Arthur: *stuttering* I GOTTA GO!!!!!! *RUNS*

Aww, thank you @sugar-coated-prat-dragon! But this imagination is both a blessing and a curse, as I am constantly tormented by fic ideas that I do not have the time to write, which leads to my drafts folder looking like this:

And all of those are au ideas that I started and haven't finished 😅

But the plot bunny demons whisper in my ear, and I cannot ignore their calls!

Hello everyone! I'm back with another au! Enjoy! :)

This au picks up at the battle of Camlann, where Morgana uses a spell to deactivate Merlin's aging spell. All of Camelot's forces look on in horror as the old sorcerer on the ridge turns out to be Merlin. Merlin himself looks devastated by this.

Morgana then begins goading Merlin by loudly revealing all his secrets to Arthur, Gwen, and all the knights on the battlefield, intending to make sure that he could never return to Camelot. She reveals that he is Emrys, all-powerful, magic incarnate, the son of the Triple Goddess, and a god of the Old Religion in human form. He is the the most feared creature in all of Camelot, and they never even knew it.

Merlin, enraged by this, viciously fights Morgana with his magic. Mordred abandons his goal of battling Arthur to rush over to Morgana's side, trying to defend her from Emrys's wrath.

Merlin, still carving a path of destruction and death through the battlefield, doesn't hesitate to strike Mordred down with lightning. While Morgana was too busy being stunned and horrified by what just happened, Merlin takes Mordred's fallen dragon-forged blade and runs Morgana through with it, ending her for good.

The remaining soldiers in Morgana's Saxon army, now decimated and seeing that their leader is dead, killed by a force far more powerful than she herself, turn around and flee, desperate to avoid being slaughtered at the hands of a god.

With the Saxons gone, the battlefield of Camlann goes quiet, with the only sounds being the quiet whistling of the wind blowing through the valley. Camelot's knights are frozen in fear and shock, looking at Arthur for guidance for what to do next.

However, Arthur himself is frozen still too, unable to tear his eyes away from Merlin, the man who he trusted more than anyone, who was never even a man to begin with. His manservant, who was secretly a god the entire time!

But Merlin has his back turned to Arthur, and is simply gazing out into the distance. He turns around though, and he meets Arthur's eyes for a split second, before vanishing into thin air.

A second later, Arthur could swear that he heard Merlin's voice whisper along with the wind, "I'm sorry."

Staring out across the now empty battlefield, Arthur had no choice but to shakily order the knights to pack up and return to Camelot. There was nothing left for them here.

They returned to camp and started the journey back to Camelot in silence, everyone's minds reeling from what had just happened. The sudden revelation of Merlin's true nature had left Arthur, Gwen, and the knights terrified and unsure of everything.

Once back in the safety of Camelot, Arthur has a huge breakdown, wondering how the hell he's even alive if the man he's bossed around for the past ten years was actually capable of brutally destroying an entire army with a wave of his hand the entire time. How had he survived if he had been humiliating a god every day for years, a god whose followers had been slaughtered by his hand!

Their return to Camelot had been stressful to say the least, all of them on edge despite their victory. Yes, Merlin Emrys had ensured their victory, but who knew what plans the god had for Camelot now that his true nature was revealed?! What revenge would he enact on the kingdom responsible for the purge?!

These thoughts haunted Arthur even as he returned to his chambers, changed himself into his nightclothes (and ignoring the fact that the god of magic had been dressing him for the past decade), and fell into a fitful sleep.

Arthur was shocked and terrified when, in the morning, he was awoken with a very familiar "Rise and shine, dollophead! You have a full schedule today!"

His heart stuttered with terror as his eyes shot open and beheld the sight of Merlin, smiling and looking as he always did, as if nothing had changed. His heart pounded with sudden fear as he leapt out of bed, scrambling for something, anything to defend himself with against the man who had once been his closest friend. But, Arthur's mind hissed at him, what good would any sword do against a god?! He was as good as dead already!

Merlin Emrys, to Arthur's shock, didn't even bat an eye at Arthur pulling a blade on him and set the tray full of breakfast on the table, completely unphased.

"Come on, we don't have time for this, Arthur! Just sit down and eat your breakfast while I pick out your clothes for the day."

Arthur's however, didn't move from his place against the wall. Did he really think Arthur was stupid enough to fall for something like that?

Well, Arthur's mind hissed again, you were stupid enough to mistake a god for an manservant for ten years.

Emrys simply rolled his eyes, his impatience now showing, and Arthur braced himself to be hit with the full force of divine wrath.

Something in the air shifted, and Arthur suddenly found himself sitting at the table without having moved a muscle, with the breakfast tray in front of him.

"There we go! Now, please hurry up and eat. I didn't even steal one of your sausages this time! So, for today, do you want to wear your training gambeson or your more formal set?"

Arthur said nothing in response, too busy staring, petrified by fear and bewildered beyond words, at the god of magic lay out his clothes for the day.

The rest of the day goes on like this, with Merlin pretending like everything's normal while Arthur, and everyone else in the castle, is completely terrified by Merlin's presence alone. But, they can't really make him to leave.

Knights who draw their swords at the sight of Merlin find that their blades turn to dust as soon as he looks at them. The servants who see him, who have no doubt heard the disturbing news about his true nature as Emrys, scream in terror and run away at the sight of him.

Even Guinevere, who was sitting on her throne next to Arthur when she saw Merlin out of the corner of her eye, holding a pitcher of watered down wine like it was an ordinary day, tensed up with fright, her hands gripping the arms of her throne and her breathing picking up as her mind replayed memories of Merlin, her dearest friend, raining death down upon Camlann.

Eventually, Arthur gathers enough courage to ask Merlin why he's still here, what he wants from Camelot, and what it will take to have him spare Arthur's people.

And Merlin's response is to simply smile and tell Arthur that he will not leave. He is Arthur's servant, and there's nothing Arthur can do about that other than accept it.

TL;DR:

Arthur, fearing for his entire kingdom: Please, Emrys, just tell me what you want! I'm sorry about treating you like a servant! I'll do anything, just please spare my people!

Merlin, doing laundry and desperate to avoid his life changing in any way: I'm :) your :) servant :)

and so like Mariah Carey, the Merlin fandom defrosts!

Sigan: Arthur will tremble at your voice. He will kneel at your feet.

*Long pause before Merlin responds compared to any of Sigan's other statments as Merlin asks himself why certain aspects of this idea are apealing. Then Merlin reminds himself HOW Sigan means this before he can figure out his feels.*

Merlin: I don't want that.

I'm gone. I'm a few episodes into s2 and I'm lost on them. I went to sleep thinking about them. I woke up thinking about them. There's no escape

The sidhe in Avalon, writing this down: jail for Arthur for 1000 years by Emrys's decree, got it!

you STEP on merlin?? you step on his back like a footstool?? jail for arthur!! jail for arthur for one thousand years

I love the idea of Merlin's magic being sentient and completely thirsty for Arthur! 😂

And Merlin himself isn't any less thirsty, he just has a better understanding of what's socially acceptable. His magic isn't quite on board with the idea that it's considered rude to take some of your crush's blood and mix it with pure magic to create a new soul as an offspring.

Council: Sir, you have to get married soon!!!! People demand an heir!!!!

Arthur: *gay panic* I'm pregnant!

Council: what?

Arthur: *points at Merlin*: it's his!!!

Merlin: what?

Arthur: it's a magic thing! Magic did this! *Whispering* thank god magic is legal now*

Merlin's magic: can we? Can we???? He basically allowed this just now!!! Please!!!

Merlin: no!! We're going to ask him first!!!

Brining this one back for funsies because I'm thinking about the finale again and the whole butterfly symbolism always fucks me up.

A random thought on the ending of Merlin (since it haunts me all the time): there are many species of butterflies that are known to feed on corpses for nutrients. Merlin's main symbol in the finale, the symbol of his own self-acceptance and reclaiming himself from the claws of destiny, was a bright blue butterfly, a symbol of death and rebirth.

The image of it is striking for me: Merlin, symbolized by the butterfly, finally accepting himself, only for those same butterflies to turn around and feed on Arthur's corpse while waiting for Arthur himself to be reborn.

I'm insane about this show, if you couldn't already tell.