I Wonder When Harry Told Ron And Hermione That The Dursleys Used To Make Him Live Under The Stairs

Lily: this is what I want to be wearing when my husband dies under mysterious circumstances.

Sirius: yes. Exactly. Standing out on a balcony that overlooks the sea, smoking a long cigarette and the police come to question me and I say “what are you implying officer? I loved my husband!”

Lily: *nodding* yes, yes. I offer them fresh tea in the cups that just happen to be set up waiting for them.

Sirius: nah, fuck the tea. I’m drinking a Cosmo. And I have a pet pig and I casually mention that pigs can devour a human body in under an hour…

Lily: not sure about the pig, but I have a rose garden and I mention how good fertilizer helps them grow.

Sirius: ah yes, and we walk down a beautiful staircase, our perfectly manicured hands running down the ornate banister.

Lily: of course. No other way to do it.

James:….

Remus:….

Lily:…

Sirius:…

Remus: ….pig needs to be in a matching robe.

James: and a flower crown made of roses

Lily: they’re right.

Sirius: yes… Too bad they have to die.

((Based on a conversation with @iforgotthesardines about this robe:

daniel radcliffe calling out j.k. rowling on her bullshit is big dick energy

Harry hadn’t actually meant it when he told Draco that “he should try not getting arrested every few weeks.” At the time maybe he had, but Harry had grown antsy over the past few weeks.

Things had been quiet. Too quiet.

“You’d like to what?” the Head of the Aurours department asked.

“I’d like to conduct a search for Draco Malfoy,” Harry replied. Ron stood at his side looking unimpressed. Search missions required back up by law, and Harry had managed to convince a reluctant Ron to be his.

“He’s not going to give this up,” Ron pointed out.

“You know what, fine. Fine. But make it quick.”

____

Harry found Draco in the basement of Fangtasia brooding at 11am on a Thursday.

“You’re not wearing the necklace,” Draco pouted.

“That thing was bloody hideous Malfoy,” Ron said defending his friend. Draco actually looked almost offended.

“Come on Draco we both know that you usually have much better taste,” Harry said as gently as he could. Draco had clearly been struggling ever since he’d become a vampire, and as amusing as it was to watch, Harry wanted Draco to accept himself and find happiness...preferably with Harry.

“I knew you liked the leather,” Draco said proudly gesturing to his current outfit. Harry just shook his head and decided not to start this arguement.

“Draco are you okay?” Harry asked. The basement was windowless, but well lit. Draco sat at the head of a long table filled with unoccupied seats.

“None of them came,” Draco said looking at the empty seats around him with dismay.

“None of who came?” Harry asked.

“I tried to construct a founders council, and invited all the prominent Vampire families, but no one showed up,” Draco sulked. Harry nudged Ron before the boy could start laughing.

Harry was prepared for this. Harry had researched the Vampire Diaries when he’d realized Draco’s habit of picking up the identies of famous fictional vampires.

Harry spent the rest of the day making calls with Draco. They ended up enlisting Luna’s help and instead created a council of influential magical minorities.

Harry hopes that this was a good substitute for the support groups Draco had opted out of having. But wasn’t surprised when Draco ended up back in his office a week later.

Vampire Draco XD

LISTEN YOU… I WASN’T SUPPOSED TO BE THE ONE WRITING THIS GOD DAMMIT! Tagging @violetclarity for inciting shit too. :D

Word count: 200

Harry sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose for what felt like the 20th time this month. Today was supposed to be a normal day, his day for paperwork and non-magical nonsense. So when his eyes fell on Draco, sitting as casually as possible in Harry’s office chair, Harry knew his day was done.

“What did you do this time?” Harry sighed, waving his hands in a way that indicated Draco should get the fuck out of his chair.

“I asked a wizard if he knew what I was….”

Harry looked at Draco quizzically. “What’s wrong with that?”

Draco sighed and reached into his pocket, pulling out a handful of glitter. Harry stared, already knowing where this was going but really hoping it wasn’t.

“Draco… Please tell me you didn’t.”

“….I did.”

Harry let his head fall to his desk, hands pulling out his hair in hard tugs.

“But- But, just listen! It was going great, I was broody and reciting poetry. He was totally hooked.”

“And then…?”

“And then I threw glitter in his face.”

“Draco, what the actual fuck? That’s not even… The vampire in that book fucking actually sparkles. Like “diamonds”… He doesn’t throw sparkles.“

“Oooooh….”

As readers we only know what Harry notices/pays attention to, and although we have no idea what color Cho’s eyes are or what Zacharias Smith’s voice sounds like, we know a lot about Draco Malfoy. Consider. We know:

His hair is blond. But not just blond. It’s a particular, white-blond color that gleams in the sunlight. 

And very sleek, but loose enough that it falls around his face if he moves around vigorously enough.

He has grey eyes. Not just grey, but specifically light grey.

Harry also frequently describes them as glittering or sparkling. 

He presumably has a sweet tooth as he gets regular sweets packages from home delivered by his eagle owl.

He has very pale skin which takes on a grayish tinge when he’s sickly.

He tends to narrow his eyes when he’s angry.

He doesn’t blush when he’s embarrassed but he does flush - just enough to give his skin a faint pink tinge. 

He tends to move his hands a lot when talking animatedly. 

His speech has a very specific drawling cadence and tone that makes his voice easily recognizable (to Harry at least).

This is all in canon.

Meanwhile, even though Harry and Ron are together practically 24/7 for seven years, we only find out that Ron’s eyes are blue halfway through Deathly Hallows. 

remus lupin’s patronus is a wolf are you SHITTING me

like can you imagine him doing it for the first time and finally succeeding and it’s a fucking wolf and all his classmates are like “oh that’s cool” and meanwhile he walks over and kicks a desk

Another commission for @dorthyanndrarry !!! Again, they gave me free reign, so I decided to make this comic based on an hilarious scene of their fic “The Liars Department” [Tumblr // Ao3 // Wattpad]. 

I love this Narcissa so much 😚💕💕💕

I just watched this amazing german/swiss movie about two soccer players falling in love, called ‘Mario’ (it’s on Netflix and amazon video) and it’s honestly one of the best told love stories I’ve ever seen. It’s tender, intimate, slow and the chemistry between the two actors is shattering. Go watch it!

And I couldn’t help myself but to take some frames and drarry them.

a gift for @quicksilvermaid​ commissioned by @drarryruinedme7 who requested a scene from quicksilver’s fic Who we are in the shadows​

ft. werewolf Harry and a Draco who is using every ounce of his being to not let his eyes drift over to his right