𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

hi babes. i made a new story. 🤩🤩

nsfw seonghwa

so all ateez members are having a movie night and you’re invited. you’re sitting in seonghwa’s lap. some scary movie is playing and whenever you get scared you jump and cover your face. little do you know seonghwa is getting hard. after a while you feel something poke your ass. then you realise that seonghwa is hard. he then proceeds to push his hands pass your shorts and panties to rub your clit.

“shhh. make a sound and i’ll stop”

you start to squirm around and panting really hard trying to not make noise. he then rubs harder and faster with his thumb while his middle and ring finger starts entering your pussy.

“fuck your tight. after i fuck you so many times you’re still so tight. looks like i need to fuck you more”

he starts scissoring you and pushing his fingers deeper.

“gonna c-cum” you whisper softly.

“go ahead.”

he helps you ride out your high and them puts his fingers, that are coated in your cum, in his mouth.

“you taste sweet baby girl”

little did you know someone was watching…

a: im a fucking simp for seonghwa😩

wicked games | c.s

summary: He led you on for years. The one man you saw yourself with, could never give you what you so desperately craved. Love. After the devastation, you finally mustered up the courage to cut all ties with him for good and move on. At least… you tried to, until he manages to pull you right back in again.

pairings : choi san x fem!reader

tags: SMUT WARNING , MINORS DNI — vulgar language, infidelity, angst, some fluff, teasing, sensual language, unprotected sex, situationship, asphyxiation +♡

♬ — ACT A FOOL x LYRICA ANDERSON

word count: 11.3K

(Too damn long + im so sorry yall, but i hope you enjoy the story still hopefully ! lmaoooo 🩶 )

—

November 24th, 2019

San usually doesn’t ignore your calls like this.

Your worry was starting to grow with each flight of stairs that you ascended to reach his apartment. You sent message after message with no response, giving leeway to the most irrational part of you to think of the worst possible case. You stopped for a moment and opened your chat rooms again, finding Yunho, his roommate in your contacts and shooting him a quick text asking if either of them were home.

Of course San would do something like this after just asking you the night before to go on a date with him and standing you up.

Asshole. You asked yourself countless times why you still put up with him, but you fell short of an educated answer. You just loved him and that was enough of a reason for you. However, you were frustrated and freeing and had half a mind to turn around and leave, but your phone suddenly rang with a new notification.

Yunho had answered you. He said that he wasn’t home, but San was. He had talked to him just an hour ago before you arrived in the area. He said it was possible that he could be playing video games with his headset on and doesn’t hear his phone going off. He told you not to worry about him too much.

Easy for you to say..

The nagging feeling in your chest slowly began to subside at his response. Yunho knew you long enough to know that you loved to worry about San even if unwarranted. He also knew that you were in love with him before you did. Yunho was always present and knowing of everything without actually witnessing it himself. Sometimes his assuring and know-it-all behavior pissed you off; mainly because you wish you had that much confidence in everything around you. You envied him in more ways than one.

정윤호

81024# is the code for the key lock, you can let yourself in. If he is playing video games he probably cant hear you ringing the doorbell either. Dont steal anything ;)))

You laughed a little harder at that than you intended to. Why was he always so unserious about everything? You would question him on his behavioral tactics later, all you wanted to do was get out of the petrifying cold and be with San. So, you moved quickly– scared that if you stayed in one place for too long your boots would freeze to the concrete beneath your feet. You quickly shot Yunho another text, thanking him for his help.

Shuffling up the last flight of stairs, you grounded yourself on the platform and rounded the corner that led to the first set of apartments on the floor. You continued forward until you came to the eighth door. Your ears perked at the sound of movement inside.

And then a voice. And another.

Unfortunately, it was too muffled for you to pick up anything else, and you assumed that he had company over. More than likely Wooyoung. Maybe Yunho didn’t know he was coming?

Referring to the code that he had granted you, you slid up on the keypad and punched in the digits. A short and kind of cute chime sounded from the mechanism telling you that you put in the right code and the door buzzed, undoing whatever security measurements that came with the system and clicked open. You made your way inside, being welcomed to the familiar, manly, but still good scent of their home. The warmth from the heater hit you and you never accounted for how much you desired to be hot for once.

You pulled your boots off along with your coat before wandering into the rest of the apartment. Peeking your head into the living area just around the corner from the entrance where you knew their joint gaming console was. The television was still on and playing a show loudly rather than a game, which explains the voices you heard from outside, but he was nowhere in sight. Neither was Wooyoung like you expected.

He must be in his room. You thought.

As many times as you have been to his place and even spent nights here, you still felt like you were intruding– that eerie feeling telling you that you shouldn’t be here was looming over your gut, but you continued anyway.

“San?” You called out instinctively as you neared his bedroom. The door was closed, so you placed your hand on the door knob and pushed it open. The worst possible case was that he was naked, which you didn’t mind as you’ve seen many parts of each other anyway. “I’ve been trying to call you, but you didn’t-”

You weren’t sure what look you had on your face, but you were more than sure that it resembled exactly what you were feeling on the inside. Heartbreak. Your eyes went wide and your lips parted in shock at the sight of Choi San, the man you loved more than anything, scrambling from underneath a naked girl. A girl that wasn’t you. But it wasn’t some random girl. No. That dark hair, that disintegrating butterfly tattoo on the back of her shoulder. You knew her.

Your skin glossed over with a chill. And your heart broke into a million pieces.

It was Veronica. Your best friend. At least that’s what you thought until now.

“Jesus… What the hell?! What are you doing here?” Panic was obvious in San’s voice as he sat up in the bed, looking just as frightened and bewildered as you were. He climbed out of the bed and quickly pulled on his boxers.

“You…Are you serious?” There was nothing in you that tried to maintain composure as everything you were feeling began to bubble to the surface and you let it come out. “What the fuck are you doing here, V??”

“How the hell did she even get in here??” She barely even acknowledged you. Just looked to him like a savior of some sort. And that pissed you off even more.

San took a step towards you and you took two steps back. “Look, I can explain.”

You put your hand up to him to stop him from speaking. “Don’t…talk to me. You don't get to speak to me right now.”

“San, can you just make her leave? She’s being a nuisance.”

“Hey, stop. Just let me handle this.” San corrected her and she shifted in place, gripping the covers that were keeping her breasts from spilling out into the open.

Meanwhile, you shot daggers towards Veronica at her words. Your brows furrowed across your forehead, possibly leaving a mark from the tension that you could feel between the bridge of your nose. Your lip twitched with the want to say so many things, but no words were strong enough to show what you were really feeling. Rage.

You looked eagerly around the room for something. All you needed was something. Anything. That’s when your eyes locked onto it. A medium sized glass cup sat dormant on his computer desk, and with the quickness of a quality athletic star as well as the strength of one, you grabbed the glass and hurled it in Veronica’s direction before San could grab and stop you. She let out an ear-jerking screech and covered her head with her hands before the harsh sound of the glass shattering filled the room and silenced everyone in it. You couldn’t control yourself at that moment. You missed her by a few inches as the glass impacted with the wall just above the headboard, sending shards falling on the sheets and her. Part of you wanted it to hit her. You wanted her to hurt like you were hurting, but it still wasn’t enough to quell your anger.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! You’re mental.” Veronica snapped.

“Seriously?!” San grabbed your arms, trying to push you back to get you out of the vicinity of Veronica. “You need to calm down.”

You pressed your hands to his bare chest and pushed him back off of you. “Don’t fucking touch me! Calm down?” You focused your gaze back on her. “You knew. You knew about us the whole time! And you do this?”

“Obviously, there wasn’t an “us” between you if he’s fucking me and not you. Right?” She spoke with such a venom lining her words and they were aimed directly at your heart. “Me and Jamie warned you. You didn’t listen.”

“I should have known from the beginning that you were a grimey bitch. You’d open your legs for anybody that so much as blinks at you.” You snapped back.

“How do you think that I got in his bed then?”

You were going to kill her. You felt like crying right there, but your blood was already boiling in a crimson pot. It not only pained you to hear those words from someone you once considered a friend, but from someone who also knew every single thing that happened between you and San. Every tear you cried was on her shoulder, every message of happiness and celebration you sent her, she sent you her congratulations. She was there for it all.

And she betrayed you. He betrayed you.

“I can’t fucking believe you…both of you.” You scoffed, backing away from San with weak and rigid steps. “You two deserve each other.”

You attempted to turn and walk out, but he grabbed your arm to stop you. “God, don’t be like that.” San coaxed. “This didn’t mean anything.”

He always tries explaining everything away, making everything seem smaller than what it was. Acting as if none of this was a big deal, but he just couldn’t see the pain in your eyes that was hiding behind the blind rage. You glanced down at his hand for a second and then back up to him, yanking your hand away without another thought.

“I don’t give a fuck what it meant. Whatever it is…that I thought we had? It’s over. Keep her for all I care, just don’t talk to me ever again. In fact, forget I exist–forget that we ever existed.” Those were possibly the coldest words that you have ever said to him. It hurt you to even say them, and you could see the sly grin that was on his face soon falter.

“You’re not serious. Come on, we can fix this. She doesn’t mean anything to me. You do.”

“Godd! You’re so full of shit, San! She meant something if it was enough to risk-.” Your eyes burned through him like you had laser vision. You wanted him to hurt. You wanted to tear him down just like he did you over the years. “Forget it.” He just couldn’t know that your heart was breaking into pieces. “And if I really meant something to you, you wouldn’t have fucked my best friend behind my back. I’m done. We’re done.”

He had heard you say that many times before, but now he realized you were serious.

You stomped out of the room, making a b-line for the front door. Quickly stuffing your feet back into your boots and grabbing your coat from the rack, you placed your hand on the door knob and was just about to crank it to leave when you heard San’s voice crowing and breaking from the same spot where you had just left him.

“Please, let’s just talk about this. I- I don’t want you to go. I-” He paused. “I love you.”

You thought when you heard those words from him for the first time, that it would light a fire in your stomach. You would smile like an idiot and throw yourself into his arms like a love sick puppy. It was everything you ever wanted to hear him say, but hearing them now? Like this, when you were on the verge of breaking down? All it did was burn a hole through your heart, severing the last bit of forgiveness you could ever give him– along with whatever love that remained.

A singular tear fell from your eyes but was absorbed by the thick fur of your coat. You didn’t even bother to look at him. If he saw you cry, it would give him the satisfaction of your sadness. It would tell him that you still cared. That you still could possibly love him despite what he had just done to you. That there was still a chance at redemption. And you didn’t want to care about him anymore. So from this moment, you decided to hate him. For good.

You took a deep breath. Letting that numbness wash over your heart. And with the last inkling of strength in your voice, you spoke to him one final time and meant it.

“Fuck you, San.”

계속하다

Present Day

Those were the last words you ever uttered to him since your relationship ended.

Calling it a “relationship” is a bit of a stretch though, it could better be compared to Hell on Earth. An excruciatingly ugly, painful, heartbreaking, love story that went up in flames once the final straw had been broken. The thought of it filled you with agony and it felt as if the pain would be eternal, which is why you stopped thinking about it completely. But for some reason it resurfaced.

For whatever grudge the universe had against you for whatever reason, the thought of what you once had, had oddly brought you… comfort. If that was the right term to use. It felt familiar even with the blight it left on your heart. That’s how he was, Choi San— albeit possibly your worst decision in a man at the time— he had a way of conflicting every emotion and thought you had just by saying a few simple words. He was a smooth talker, you see. Blessed and born with a silver tongue and a kindness that made his every transgression against you seem minute (my-nute).

He always had a knack of luring you right back into his trap whenever you attempted to free yourself. His smile brought you to the closest feeling of love that he would permit you to have, and his kisses made you fall even harder. If he cut you by his bastard-like actions, he would heal you with his words, or by fucking you so good that you completely forgot why you were angry in the first place. Until he does it again and the cycle continues.

It was all a part of his little game and you were too in deep not to play.

Each night with him that you did not spend yelling and throwing tantrums, you would lay in his arms and let the calm sweep you into a deep slumber. When you shut your eyes all you could see were the same blaring red lights that flashed constantly behind your eyelids. They were your warning. A wailing and urgent siren that was almost deafening to your ears, screaming for you to get away while you were ahead. Every neuron in your brain fired off in an attempt to make you aware of the damage that was set to ensue if you continued this way with him.

You never listened.

That was probably the most justifiable reason behind all of your sleepless nights. Maybe if you had heeded those warnings, and listened to your first mind back then to leave him before you gave him a piece of yourself , you could have been saved from the intense heartbreak later and the aftermath of pain that followed in his wake.

You hated him, but for some reason unbeknownst to you, you still mourned your separation.

He was your first love after all.

You built a fantasy world around your heart to protect it from the truth of who he really was. It was the only solace and peace that you could maintain by giving yourself a place to hide when false hope seeped in. The hope that he would love you back. It kept you content with your situation and never allowed you to think any deeper about a future with him until you stopped hoping completely.

You tried your hardest to forget every moment he made you smile, the softness of his fingers when he touched your most delicate places, the way his lips felt on your flesh, and every warm feeling that resembled even an ounce of love or admiration that you had for him. You tried to forget it all. You wanted to. You needed to. And now the only memories that remained were all filled with regret, anger, sadness, and hate.

Although it has been four years since you have felt that way, those feelings still linger even now, trickling into your present no matter how hard you tried to keep them in the past.

“Soooooo…the company dinner-” Yunho tried the topic again, but you quickly shut him down.

“Hell no.” You didn’t even have to look at him when you said it, just continued to work on the stove, stirring around the ramyeon that would be your lunch.

Yunho let out an egregiously loud, and seemingly frustrated groan. “Dude, you promised.”

You set down your cooking utensil next to the pot and cranked down the heat before turning to face him at the kitchen island where he sat across from you. “Yeah, I did! That was before you so graciously informed me that that evil bitch would be there.”

“I didn’t know that she was the event coordinator this time. The other one got booted off at the last minute, Jamie was the one that told me, and told me to tell you as soon as possible.” He explained, mentioning your— mentionably more loyal— other best friend of almost ten years, Jamie, moving his hands around so wildly while he spoke that it was hard for you to focus on him.

“Look, I’m grateful that you gave me a heads up!”

“Thank you for some recognition! Jamie and I work hard for you.” He said.

There he goes being unserious again. You sighed softly. “But that’s where it stops. I think if I get within ten feet of her I may actually kill her.”

“You tried that once, remember? Didn’t really work out.” Yunho grabbed the glass of wine sitting in front of him and took a sip of it.

Low blow. You flicked him off for his comment, visibly irritated at what he said, but all he did was laugh.

Yunho cocked his head to the side, leaned forward on the marble surface of the kitchen island and stared up at you with the most aggravatingly cute smile. “Did you know that you look even prettier when you’re pissed off at me?”

You rolled your eyes and turned back to the stove. “You’re annoying..”

“You love me for it.” He cooed.

“Debatable topic at best.” You said flatly, moving over to the counter to chop up the rest of the meat slices to mix into the broth.

The chair scraped across the tile. Heavy footfalls began to round the corner of the kitchen island, leaving your mind to the imagination of where Yunho was going as you focused on your task in the kitchen. The muscles in your back tensed when you felt a sudden weight pressed against it. Long, strong arms stretched out beside you; his hands found purchase on the counter and trapped you against it as your breath hitched at his closeness. Yunho cleared you in height alone, standing at a whopping 6’3 compared to you. You weren’t short yourself, but anybody that stood next to him would look like an ant. His presence alone was dominating and commanding and suddenly you felt much less brave than you did 3 seconds prior.

You stopped cutting and slightly turned your head towards him. His lips were pursed against your ear and you were scared about what would follow after.

His breath was cool and it made the hairs on your neck stand on end when he whispered, “I don’t think it’s that debatable..”

He placed a kiss on your earlobe. Another on your jaw. Your neck, canvassing the beautiful tone of your skin. He pressed his pillowy pair against your shoulder and it caused you to shiver. You could feel the smile pulling at his lips at your reaction.

“Yunho..you know we can’t. Jamie will be home soon.” You said almost breathlessly. The warmth radiating from his body also made you hot. You could feel the heat rising in your cheeks.

“You even say my name pretty. How am I supposed to resist you if you talk like that?” His voice was deep and sultry, housing a slight grumble at the end of every word.

“What if Jamie-“

“I don’t care about Jamie. I care about you.” Yunho snaked his arms around your waist and spins you around to face him.

Jamie would probably kill you if she found out since Yunho was just as much her best friend as he was yours. Besides, I doubt she would want to know that the two of you ever had sex in the first place or how you even got there to begin with.

When you ended things with San, you also tried to cut every piece of him out of your life entirely. Including Yunho. Even though the two of you were close, he was even closer with San than you were. You didn’t need to have that constant reminder of the man that broke your heart, so you stopped talking to Yunho as well as his friend group entirely—etching that part of your life out of your head for good. However, Yunho didn’t take that too lightly.

A little bit after the incident one night, while you were crying your eyes out on the couch in the very apartment that you stood in, there was a resounding knock at the door. Thinking it was Jamie, your roommate, who left her key again, you wiped your tears and quickly shuffled to let her in. To your surprise as well as your dismay, it wasn’t the olive toned ginger you had come to spend your teenage years with, but instead Jeong Yunho in all of his terrible timing glory.

You tried to close the door on him and tell him to leave, but he stopped you. Insisted that he wanted to merely check on you since it had been so long since you spoke. He then spilled that Jamie knew you needed a friend and she wouldn’t be home for another two days, so she asked him to come see you. As much as you wanted to yell at her, you knew her heart was in the right place.

You weren’t sure how things got to where they did, but you remembered that he apologized over and over again for letting him hurt you and that he had no idea about him and Veronica. He said they even got into a fight about it and hadn’t seen San since that night. Him telling you that opened the floodgates and you found yourself pouring everything you kept inside out onto his shoulder. He held you with his fingers hooked into your hair and pressing you even deeper into his shoulder for you to cry. He said it was okay and he understood. He pulled you off of his shoulder and cupped your face with his hands, wiping away the neverending flow of your burning tears with his thumbs. Yunho called you beautiful. He hated to see you cry so he smiled and the sight alone unthawed the iceberg that you had locked around it. One thing led to another… and well.

He kissed you. You didn’t stop him. Nor did you want to. You needed him more in that moment than you ever had since you met.

You tried many times to end whatever it was between you countless because of your guilt, but Yunho never wanted to.

“Let’s be guilty together.” Is what he would say to you.

That’s how all of this mess started. Ever since then, it’s been an unspoken thing. There was no commitment there, but rather a comfort. Something only the two of you understood. You felt horrible, but at the same time it was just nice having someone. He was not yours and you weren’t his, but when you were together it was just you two. No expectations. Maybe it made you a hypocrite, but you stopped caring a long time ago.

For the first time you looked into his eyes and saw the hunger lying in his hues. He scoured every inch of your face, but danced around the lining of your lips as if he could taste them just by looking at them.

Throwing your arms around his shoulders, you pulled yourself in closer to him and smiled, lowering your voice to speak as if it weren’t only the two of you in here. “If I knew you were going to be this much trouble, I would have left you outside that night.”

Yunho moved in even closer, so that you could feel his breath brushing across your lips. “Well, since you didn’t, now I can do this.”

His lips collided against yours tenderly. They tasted just as sweet as they were the last time you kissed him, hinting at a slight berry flavor from the chapstick he frequently wore. They felt smooth and delicate against your own. Yunho guided you through the kiss and you followed. The kiss was gentle but firm, like he was trying to let you know that he meant every single word he has ever said to you.

His arms tightened around your waist more, tugging you closer to him so that your bodies were pressed against the other. The two of you were perfectly in sync as you explored each other’s mouths. Your fingers tangled into his thick blonde hair before dropping to his chest, fisting the white shirt he had on. With soft exasperated sighs in between each motion of your lips, Yunho dipped his hands down from your waist and around to your ass, grabbing almost all of you with both of his massive palms. You chuckled softly against him and he did the same.

Then you heard a clunking sound. Something similar to a chime. The door. A Lock. Keys. Oh God. Jamie. She’s home. The cute moment was ruined by the two of you scrambling to look as unsuspecting as possible.

“I’m baaaaaaaack!” Jamie sang out in an awful tune, sending goosebumps across your arms. Eerie.

You cleared your throat and continued cooking your lunch. Yunho acted as if he was rummaging the cabinets for snacks as your best friend came galloping into the kitchen.

“Oh, you’re here. Why?” Her words were laced with disappointment and you knew she was referring to Yunho.

“Ouch. Why did you say it like that? Am I not welcome?”

“You are! It’s just.. you’re a still man. I’m just shocked at your presence.” Jamie said. “Anyway! I come bearing giftsss!”

“What’d you get me?” Yunho asked, suggestively.

“Hopefully out of my house soon.” Jamie bit back.

You chortled, but tried to hide it when you felt Yunho staring daggers into the back of your head. You quickly finished cutting up the meat and added it to the broth to simmer, placing the lid overtop and turning to Jamie finally.

“You went shopping?” You asked her curious about what she brought.

“Of course I went shopping! You know what tonight is.” She sounded more ecstatic about it then you thought she would.

“Ohhh about that.” Yunho scratches the back of his head nervously. “I don’t think she’s going.”

“WHAT?” Jamie exclaims, looking expectantly between the two of you for an answer. “Why isn’t she going? Why aren’t you going? Are you sick? Pregnant?”

“Pregnant??” You questioned.

“Pregnant?!” Yunho also questioned, seemingly more shocked that it could even be an option. The two of you nervously looked at each other.

“I’m asking you!”

You waved her off. “No! God no. Veronica.”

“Oh.” Jamie untensed and set down the bags she brought in down onto the chairs in front of her. “That bitch. I forgot about her.”

“Exactly my point. I can’t be trusted around her.” You tried to plead to Jamie, hoping that she would understand.

“Good, you won't be around her. You’ll be around us. You’re going. I’m not letting that skank control your life anymore.”

“She doesn’t!”

“If you wont go somewhere because of someone they control your life. Look, I know you hate her. Hell, I hate her too for what she did to you but I can’t let you stay cooped up in the house all the time just because there’s a possibility that you might run into her again. Tonight will be fine, I promise.”

You appreciated Jamie for trying to be such an assuring force in your life amongst all the uncertainty surrounding you. She had a knack for pushing you out of your comfort level, and then it may appear to be forceful to some. Jamie never did anything unless it was with love.

“Hey, we won’t let anything happen tonight. I’ll even stay on Veronica watch if it’ll make you more comfortable.” Yunho piped up, leaning against the counter as he delved into whatever odd snack he actually managed to find in the cabinets.

“We’ll take care of you. It’ll be fine. Plus, I also spent $100 on buying a dress for you and it’s really freaking cute so if you don’t put it on, I will. But I’d rather see you in it.” Jamie picked up one of the fancy looking shopping bags, with a designer brand you had never heard of, and held it out to you expectantly.

You looked between Yunho and Jamie and their happy and hopeful stares caused you to cave instantly. “Fine… I’ll go.”

계속하다

This was the worst decision you ever made. Why were you here? The fabric from your dress was tightening around you with every movement you made, making the long leg slit that was cut into it ride a little further up your thigh than you were hoping it would. The heels you wore were comfortable, but you only wore these things on occasion and still weren’t the best at walking in them especially for long periods of time. And these company dinners are always long.

Yunho was the first to get out of the car, and in a gentlemanly manner he walked around to your side and opened the door.

“My lady.” He bowed before you and offered you his hand to help you out. The gesture brightened your smile and you accepted, feeling much like a princess on the way to a ball.

He assisted Jamie out as well and tossed the keys to the valet who dutifully took his car for him.

The place was flooded with people. Rich people mainly, stepping out of luxury cars and limousines. Almost all of them had a partner that they would ascend the stairs with— some were older men in their sixties with women possibly in their early thirties . Gross. You thought to yourself, but who were you to judge? Although, you were.

You looked to Jamie who was just more excited to go in as anybody else. Her dress was black, strapless and shimmery compared to your steel gray silk. Her hair was curled like a supermodel from the 1950’s, falling over the bareness of her shoulder more on one side than the other. Your hair was in coils, falling down the length of your back. Yunho wore a black tuxedo as well, complimenting the both of you, but his collar was slightly undone without a tie and opened up a V down to his chest where the only thing you could see was a gold chain that he wore fitted around his collarbone. He stepped in between the both you and Jamie and extended his winged arm on both sides for the two of you to take, which you did.

“How does it feel being my dates for tonight?” He chimed, sounding just as much of a man as he had always been. You rolled your eyes, and Jamie physically hurled.

“Is it too late to ask the valet to bring the car back?” Jamie mused.

“Considering that I’m your ride for the night. I would have left the sly comments at the apartment.” Jamie laughed at Yunho’s words and you did too, feeling more loose and less anxious than you did moments before when you stepped out of the car.

The three of you walked up the stairs together, arm in arm, following the rest of the crowd into the party. You felt a tug on your arm and suddenly a Yunho parked right beside your ear. You stiffened immediately.

“You look beautiful, by the way.” He whispered.

His compliment made you hot under the collar, if you had one to get hot under, sending a spark up your spine. You cleared your throat and smiled up at the giant figure beside you. “You look handsome yourself. You clean up nice.”

“I try my best. If I would have known you would be looking like this tonight, I would have tried harder.”

Yunho chooses the worst times to flirt with you. Around all of these people and Jamie being right there, you grew more and more flustered as the conversation went on. He escorted you successfully into the party— giving you a full view of the large dining hall. Not only was it the biggest hall you had ever seen, it was also a ballroom. Tables surrounded the extremely glossy floor that was covered with a sea of people engaged in conversation. Chatter and obtuse laughter filled your ears, but it was so hard to focus on one conversation with how many people it was. Servers walked through the crowd with refreshments and offered the three of you one upon entry. You all took it and thanked him.

“I’m going to go mingle a bit and see if I can find the guys. Don’t have too much fun without me.” Yunho said, pulling himself free from the two of you, he slipped into the crowd but not without rubbing the back of his hand across your backside.

Yunho would be the death of you.

You and Jamie were left to your own devices now and there was no way you were going anywhere without her. You didn’t know anybody here except her and Yunho, so you latched yourself to her side.

“Oh! Oh, that’s the chairman I was talking to you about right there. Come on.” She motioned off to a group of people standing in a circle, laughing about something amongst each other. She pointed to an older guy, stout, but still kind of handsome? His hair was going gray, but still had streaks of black in it and he was dressed to the nines in a bright white suit. Bold.

Jamie clasped her arm around yours and dragged you over to his direction. She called out to the chairman who recognized his name, and Jamie bowed politely to greet him. He seemingly knew her very well because he greeted her by name, welcoming the two of you into the conversation. Jamie introduced you to him and you bowed as well, bowing to the others who you were amongst since they also looked like important people but you only stood there awkwardly. You had no idea what they were discussing, so you were there as moral support for Jamie.

Instead you looked out at the rest of the crowd and all of the different people in it. It was fascinating how many rich people were all in one room— hell you didn’t know this many of them existed. The ballroom itself was currently the most powerful place on earth. There were old men, young men, young women, old women. So many different types of people dressed in their best. You wondered where Yunho was and wanted to see if you could find him, but he was nowhere to be seen. He must have found his friends. Your curiosity got the best of you so you stared for a little longer to see if you saw them by chance. And you did, knowing that they were the only people in here with those hair colors. Most of them had their backs to you, so you could only tell based on that alone, who was who. Seonghwa with his black hair was standing beside Wooyoung and Maddox, who you had only met once or twice, Yeosang with his dark hair on the other side of him, and Hongjoong with his light brown was next to Jongho who stood in the middle of Mingi and…

Silence fell over you. You couldn’t take your eyes off of them. Off of him. No Yunho in sightz Only San. Veronica. Together. You didn’t realize how long you had to be looking at him because by some miracle he noticed that someone was staring straight into the side of his head. He suddenly turned and looked directly at you. His shock was just as apparent as yours, and you lost your footing for a second, stumbling into Jamie who was beside you. The chairman and the others turned to you with concern.

“Whoa, Are you okay?” Jamie asked, gripping your arms to hold you upright. “What happened?”

“I-I” You stammered.

Jamie cleared her throat and bowed to the Chairman. “Excuse us for a moment.”

She took you out of the circle and placed a hand on your shoulder. “What’s going on? Are your shoes hurting you? Are you hungry? Thirsty? You feel cold.”

“He’s here.” You said softly to her.

“Who?”

“San.” You said through gritted teeth, looking around, hoping not to conjure him up around you.

“WHAT?” Her voice elevated among the crowd and a few people turned to look. “What? He’s here. Why the fuck is he here?”

“He’s with Veronica and the others.”

“Oh that son of a bitch. He’s got some nerve. Where is Yunho? Is he with him?”

“I didn’t see him. I think I need a drink.”

“You need more than that. Come on.” Jamie grabbed your hand and weaved through the crowd that was gathering.

You followed her, not knowing where you were going in the slightest. Once you made it through the wave of bodies, you were pulled up to the large bar top.

“What can I get you ladies tonight?” The bartender asked, whilst cleaning out a glass with a rag.

“The strongest thing you have.” You said with no resistance.

“Coming right up.” The bartender immediately got to work, fishing out a few bottles from the shelves behind him and started pouring and mixing, taking orders from the other customers who walked up as well.

In a matter of minutes, he placed two orange colored glasses down to you and Jamie , sticking a lime in each slit of the glass. You thanked him and immediately drank it.

“I’m so sorry. I had no idea he would be here. I even looked at the guest list. That's how I knew Veronica would be here.” Jamie explained. “This is my fault. I should have let you stay home.”

You separated from the glass and leaned against the counter, putting all of your weight on your hands. “It’s not your fault Jamie. I just- I just need a second.”

“Okay. Okay…um. Do you want to leave?” She asked, placing a calming hand on your arm. “I don’t want to risk you two running into each other.”

Downing what remained of your drink, you let the liquor burn a stream of worry down your throat. You grimaced from the pain, but took it, sucking in a vat of fresh air to cool your lungs again.

“Yeah. I think I should go. I’ll go find Yunho.” you insisted, waving off Jamie from taking on anymore hassle.

“Alright, I’ll be waiting here and we can leave. Just scream if you need me. Well- don’t actually, but just call me.” She nodded to you half-heartedly. You had a feeling she was itching to follow you, but you didn’t need her to babysit you.

Seeing San was not what you had expected to happen tonight, but who were you kidding? Of course he would be wherever his friends were, they were inseparable. You just assumed that you would not have been there to even know it in the first place.

You slammed your drink back down on the bar top and gathered your clutch purse and your phone. Returning a reassuring nod to a very visibly anxious Jamie and wandered off into the thicket of the dinner crowd. You maneuvered through countless bodies, searching for a remnant of your friend. There was nothing really differentiating him from the other patrons despite his long blonde mullet in a sea of pepper-gray hairs so you looked out for that. You peeked through conversations, from behind the backs of stockholders and possible CEOs in the hopes that one of them would be Yunho who magically disappeared.

You wandering about so curiously earned you some concerned glares from the partygoers, but you gave them a soft smile in the hopes to ease their tension from seeing you so confused and distraught.

Where is he? The ballroom was large and there were so many people, you could be searching for him forever, but time was of the essence and you needed to find him so you could get out of dodge as soon as possible. The last thing you needed was to run into San or, equally, Veronica again tonight. You’ve had your fill of both of them for a lifetime even if it was for five seconds. A few minutes went by and you had searched a good sum of the ballroom floor, but there was still no sign of Yunho anywhere.

He wasn’t answering your texts or your phone calls, which was weird because he always answered no matter what. Where could he be that has him caught up? You looked around and thought for a moment and then it hit you. Standing on the tips of your heels, you looked around at the looming walls above the party hoping to find some kind of sign that pointed to the direction of the nearest bathrooms. Your eyes latched onto a black sign pointed towards a dark hallway that would lead you exactly where you wanted to go.

Quickly, you dashed that way, calling your pardons and excuses to the people you plowed through and or pushed by. There were people coming out of the darkness of the hallway, some men, some women who had just seemingly handled their business. None of who were yunho who you were hoping for. So you tread further. The hall was dimly lit by a few candelabras attached to the wall, giving it a soft yellow glow. Thanks to the light, you finally managed to locate the restrooms decorated with their set signs to let you know which was which.

Then, the door to the men’s bathroom flew open with a screech. Happiness filled your features. You waited for the moments that the striking, tall blonde would appear in front of you and crack a joke about how he drank too much and didn’t realize it.

“Yunh-“ You called out, hopeful.

But your hope was misplaced because as soon as the door opened and the man stepped out into view, you were met with black. Not blonde like Yunho was.

Your happy appearance fell. You locked eyes and both stood there awkwardly yet again. San. Of course it was San. Why wouldn’t it be San? You cursed the gods at the moment in your head.

All you could think about at that moment was escape. You needed to get away from him, you could turn around and get lost in the crowd, return to Jamie and tell her that you both lost your ride and couldn’t find him anywhere, but San was fast enough that he could catch you before you even managed to think about leaving.

So you had only one other option to make it look less suspicious. Your eyes left his and flickered over to the women’s restroom.

San called out your name, but his voice was lost to you as you charged through the door and let it shut him out.

There was no way he was going to come in here, anybody could walk in or walk out in a moment’s notice. He’ll have to leave or wait for you to come out and there was no way that you were doing that with him still here. Due to the lack of movement in any of the stalls, you assumed you were alone, so you walked over to the sinks and set down your purse, going back to your recent call logs and ringing Yunho again. You put the phone to your ear and paced against the polished tile floor.

“Pick up, pick up, pick up.” You repeated, wishing it was the magic words to make him reappear.

The phone rang and rang and rang. No answer.

“God dammit, Yunho.” You cursed and hung up the phone.

The bathroom door suddenly pushed open. You thought nothing of it, but silenced yourself to not disturb whatever woman was coming to do her business.

“So, you and Yunho are a thing now?”

Your heart slid from its position in your chest and down into the pits of your stomach. You quickly glanced up to see Choi San standing before you with his back perched against the door. In the women’s bathroom. He seriously came in here? Is he fucking insane?

He was simultaneously blocking you in and keeping whatever potential savior there was for you outside.

“What the fuck- you need to leave.” You commanded.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“I don’t have to answer you. The door is right there. Leave.” You pointed towards the exit again, but he didn’t budge.

“Are you together? Fucking? What is it?” He asked again, this time moving off of the door and taking a few steps towards you. He was working the last nerve you were willing to give him right now.

“Why does it matter to you anyway?!” You bit back, your voice echoing through the emptiness of the restroom. “You know what? Fuck this, I’ll leave.”

You grabbed your things and tucked them under your arm, heading right for him. You put your hand on the door handle and pulled it open slightly, but San slammed his palm against it and closed it on you again.

“It matters because he’s my best friend. And he wouldn’t give me an answer, so I’m asking you.”

You laughed. You didn’t mean to, but you found the irony in his statement too funny to pass up the opportunity. “I’m sorry, that’s just really rich coming from you, San, considering you fucked my friend behind my back.”

“And you fucked mine. So, that makes us even.”

“Not even close. Yes, I had sex with Yunho, but I didn’t fuck him behind your back. You lost all my loyalty, when you chose Veronica over me. That’s on you.”

He huffed, staring down at you with those piercing brown eyes. Now that you could see him up close, his once baby-faced features were replaced with a stoic disposition. His brows were thicker and sharp making them more prone to furrow. His jawline was sharp and tense from how he was gritting his teeth, seemingly trying to hold back whatever words were about to come out of his mouth.

“Look..” San spoke your name so gently that it threw you off guard. His eyes softened and he looked upon you with no awkwardness or fear. He looked.. genuine. For the first time in forever.

But you couldn’t bring yourself to hear whatever it is he had to say to you. “Save it, San. Please.. save it. I don’t want to hear whatever excuse you cooked up in the last four years, or rehearsed to say to me whenever we saw each other again. I don’t.”

“You’re right. I’m sorry.”

I’m sorry? That’s… not what you expected. You didn’t have a snarky comeback for that one, it completely threw you for a loop. He doesn’t apologize for anything. Why is he apologizing to you now?

“I fucked up. I know and I realize that, even if it was too late when I did. I had already lost you at that point, I just didn’t know how to fix it. I hurt you. What I did with Veronica was stupid and it was on me. It was no one’s fault but mine. I’m sorry for everything that I put you through. You can keep hating me forever if you want, that’s your choice, but I couldn’t keep going on knowing that you were the only person who ever loved me and I ruined it and never apologized.”

Each word was like a shot to your stomach. Every ounce of resolve that you had was slowly beginning to crumble before him. You turned your head away from him, staring down at the ground for a moment, folding your arms across your slightly exposed chest.

“Why did you do it?” You asked firmly, still keeping your guard up with him. “Did you like her?”

There was a push on the door that startled you both and then a knock. You looked at one another in a panic and motioned to San to handle it since he was the one blocking the door.

San didn’t say a word and neither did you. He just kept a steady pressure on the door as they tried to get it open, until they only assumed that the door was jammed. There were a few disgruntled noises outside the door and then they walked off, leaving the two of you alone again.

“To answer your question. No, I didn’t like her. I didn’t love her—I didn’t feel anything for her that was remotely close to what I felt for you. I don’t know why I did it…it just happened. We were with friends and we were hanging out, we talked a bit, I guess a bit too much. Next thing I know, we kissed and well.. the rest was history.”

“And tonight? Did you come with her?”

He scoffed. “No. I’m not stupid.”

“Well?” You sang.

San glared at you.

“Sorry, it was too easy.” You shrugged. “Go on.”

He rolled his eyes. “Well, I did come with her, but I didn’t technically come with her. She just needed a ride, Seonghwa and I gave her one. I cut it off with her a few weeks after we…” He motioned between the two of you. “You know. She was already on to the next by then and we haven’t seen each other much since, until now.”

You nodded your head, feeling somewhat lighter now that he told you. “I see. Well, uhm. About Yunho and I..”

San stopped you before you could start. “You don’t have to explain to me. Let’s just say that it just happened.”

You nodded. “Yeah, it just happened.”

There was a mutual understanding in those words. Though you and Yunho had a deeper connection than what San and Veronica had, it was merely an understanding of position. You didn’t forgive him for what he did and San was probably livid deep down and probably couldn’t forgive you either, but the anger that was there from before was subsiding.

The two of you stood in silence for a moment before you spoke. “I- thank you for that, San. It was nice of you to apologize, but I have to go.”

You tried to open the door again, but instead of slamming it shut on you like he did last time, he grabbed you by your hand and held it in his. You whipped around to look at him and were met with the most heartfelt look you had ever seen him wear.

“Did you know that I’ve thought about you everyday for the last four years? I couldn’t get you out of my head for the life of me.”

“San-“

“No. It’s always been you. Everything has always been you. I can’t go to sleep at night without seeing your face. When I laugh, I think about yours. When someone smiles at me, I think about how yours was always brighter.”

“San stop.” You begged. You wanted to pull your hand from his, but for some reason you just couldn’t move. You had to get to Yunho. You needed to find him— you needed to leave. Why can’t you leave?

“Do you know what that feels like?” His hand tightened around yours. “It’s agony.”

“Why are you telling me this?” His grip only tightened.

“I meant what I said back then. I just should have said it sooner. I love you. I never stopped loving you and seeing you tonight only confirmed it. And if you don’t feel anything for me at all, we can free each other from this fucked up game right now. I’ll get out of your life for good.”

You stood there like an inanimate object. Not knowing what to say or what to do. You had felt everything that he was feeling ten times over and then some. Of course you thought about him in the past. You had thought about him living a life without you more than once. You thought about him every second of the day. The two of you were tethered by a string of damnation—you two were messy and you knew it, but you always thought that there was a possibility that you could work. Maybe he could love you the way you loved him. Maybe you could love him again. Maybe.. You wished maybe was a guarantee.

You wiggled your hand free from his grasp. San looked at you obviously distraught by the way the light in his eyes suddenly faded. You dropped everything that you were carrying in your arms as your phone and purse went clattering to the bathroom floor. Your hands moved faster than your brain ever could. You reached out to San, clasping both of your hands against his face and pulled him into you, lips crashing into a fiery slope of passion as he wrapped his arms around your backside like it was second nature to him. His build was much wider now and you felt incredibly small in his grasp, but San held you with every intent not to let go of you again.

As the kiss grew deeper, San careened his hands across your body, feeling the very places that he had been missing for the last few years. He worked your frame like he was trying to remember what spots connected to what, which ones were your favorites to be touched nowadays— he was trying to figure what kind of person you were now in just a matter of seconds.

Removing your hands from his chiseled features, you found new purchase on his suit jacket, which you tore off immediately, pulling the expensive fabric over his muscles. San pressed you against the door, letting your back meet the cool, polished wood; a single hand wrapped around your neck while an extended tongue flicked across your bottom lip, nonverbally asking for entrance, which you granted him with no hesitation. He slid his tongue between your parted lips and into your mouth, swirling his own instrument around yours. The kiss turned frantic, more hungry and needy. You moaned into his mouth, fingering the strands of his slightly long black hair while he simultaneously shifted the leg slit on your dress to the side, gripped the back of your thigh and pulled it to wrap around his slim waist.

This somehow brought the two of you even closer than you were already. He fell into you perfectly like a missing puzzle piece. You could feel his growing erection between your thighs each time he ground into you. The two of you were a bumbling mess of hormones and unsatiated emotions. San broke the kiss, using the same hand that was wrapped around your throat to tilt your head to the side. He attacked your neck like a predator, and you let him. His mouth was warm and wet and your body reacted almost instantly. You could feel the temperature rise inside your body. San continues his performance, lapping up the skin on your neck like it was refreshing to him, his kisses led down to your collarbone, your breasts. Unfortunately with the minimal time you had as well as the fabric of your dress covering the rest of you, San was limited in the love he wanted to show to your body, but that did not deter him.

Falling to his knees before you, he took the very thigh that he had wrapped around him and began to pepper it with kisses as well. Your hand was caught in his hair as you guided him, your mouth agape at the sight. You watch San with intention, as he kisses further and further up your thigh, inching the silver silk out of his way. You stuck your teeth into your bottom lip and smiled naughtily. San pulled his sharp gaze to you, and you could feel a gush between your legs. Why did he have to look at you like that? Your immediate reaction to this excited him and he continued onward in a devilish manner. Using both of his hands, he caressed your legs admiring you in all of your glory and fiddled underneath your dress, finding a latch on your panties and tugging them downwards to your ankles leaving you completely exposed.

San repositions himself as well as you. He places your leg just over his shoulder now, giving him a full view of your womanhood that was now glistening with your moisture. San licks his lips, practically salivating and grumbles with satisfaction even when he didn’t have a taste of you yet.

“God, I miss the way you taste. I think I need to remind myself again.” He said sweetly before moving forward against you.

Your breath caught in your throat once his lips connected with the sensitive hood of your clit. It was a small kiss to it, but it had so much power as well. You closed your eyes and rested your head against the doorframe, moaning softly into the air while San worked his magic. You still played with his hair offering some encouragement to continue even though you could not speak very clearly without a moan following soon after. San flushed his mouth against your pussy, you could see the lust swimming in his eyes as he stared at you the entire time.

“You’re already dripping for me. Good.”

He widened the part in your lips to give him enough room to slither his tongue inside, invading you, but of course you did not mind. It felt good already, you almost couldn’t believe it.

“Fuck..” you groaned to yourself, putting your eyes back on the beautiful man that was between your thighs.

His tongue prodded at your insides, slurping and sloshing about your velvety walls and sipping on the honey-like thickness of your juices. Every lick sent you further into the depths, you couldn’t control your moans. You almost felt too loud, but you couldn’t stop. And by the look in his eye, you almost felt like that was what he wanted. San continued to suck and kiss along the flaps of your portions , savoring every ounce of your flavor.

San separated from you for a split moment, leaving a string of his saliva as well as your wetness which his mouth was completely drenched in, and smiled at you deviously. “Damn, you taste so good.”

You could feel the rope that was holding your senses together slowly begin to unwind itself. You were too sensitive for your own liking sometimes and San knew that much about you. It didn’t take much for you to cave and now was no different. The way he was eating you out was almost too much to bear, but you didn’t want him to stop. You were just getting started.

San followed a figure eight movement on your clit, but moved his tongue like an expert inside of you, never leaving a single part of your pussy untouched. Your moans got louder and louder, you grabbed a handful of his hair and pressed him deeper into your temple. Your hips worked against his mouth and he invited it, digging his nails into your hips and pulling you closer to him. You whimpered, sounding more desperate than you had hoped to. With the way you were grinding on him, you were practically riding his nose at this point— each buck getting more uncontrollable than the last. San’s satisfied groans vibrated against your clit and you were even closer to losing it now. And he knew it.

San put more pressure on your clit using his free hand, massaging it in light circles with his thumb while he ate you out. You were getting attacked from all angles and you couldn’t handle it anymore. You let out a blood curdling yelp, followed by sharp moans and heavy breathing — releasing all of your pent up aggression onto his mouth. You twitched in place and tried to find some grip on the wall beside you to right yourself but there was nothing to hold you other than him. San lapped up your climax, and planted a kiss on your pussy before coming to meet you again. He didn’t give you a second to think as he kissed you. This time more direct and with intent. You could taste yourself on his lips. It was sweet and sticky.

“How bad do you want me to fuck you?” He asked lowly between kisses.

You were in a state of delirium, but you responded coherently. “Really fucking bad. I just want to feel you right now.”

“Good. Take it out.” He commanded.

You didn’t hesitate much to do so. You lurched forward, hooking one finger inside of his dress pants and pulled him closer to you. You undid his belt without issue, and his button followed, giving you free access to what you wanted the most. Your eyes were locked on San as you did this and he watched you with joy evident on his features. You swiftly pulled down his pants along with his boxers in the same fashion he did your panties, the belt hit the ground with a clanging noise leaving San exposed to you. He was just as big as you remembered him being if not bigger. It frightened you almost the way it stood massively at attention, twitching with eagerness. A smirk found his features, his tongue ran smoothly across his K-9’s and you had a feeling that you were in for a treat.

San pressed you flat against the door again, closing the space between you with his body. He kissed your lips again, and then your cheek and hummed lightly against your skin. “I can’t wait to see how pretty you look while I make you cum.”

San wrapped his hand around his hard-on, glancing down as he rubbed himself against your warmth, letting out a low rumble in his throat from the sensation. You soft groans mixed with his as the adrenaline pumped through your veins, filling the next few moments with anticipation. He pressed his tip against your opening, and slowly pushed himself inside of you— filling that space that he left empty. Your mouth fell agape at the shock of his size, it felt like he was stretching you out completely just to adjust to his size.

He started moving inside of you slowly at first, helping you to get used to him. “I got you baby just keep taking it, you’re doing so good.”

“You’re so fucking big..” you huffed out, holding onto San’s wide shoulders as he dug you out.

His pace quickened slightly, he wrapped your leg around him again, angling himself to hit you in just the right spot while he bounced you on his dick. His thrusts were powerful, but cohesive. His hips had a flow to them that made it feel like he was fucking you in waves.

“Yeah, you feel good wrapped around my dick. You take me so well.” He complimented, lurching into you at a speed that you were trying to keep up with. His hand was still wrapped around your neck, squeezing the air from your lungs. The pressure was comfortable, but just enough to heighten every sensation. You held onto his arm, scratching at his skin.

Still sopping wet from the last climax you had, the sounds of skin on skin contact along with the constant sloshing of your insides, was the perfect storm for the both of you. San gripped your thigh tightly, hiding his face in the thick of your neck as he roared loudly from the pressure building up against you.

“Oh San, Right there!” You coached, holding him close to you as he fucked you. Your nails clawed at the fabric on his shirt so harshly you thought that you would pierce it. The remnants of your sexual encounter were running down between your legs and you were almost at your limit. “Oh fuck, I’m going to cum.”

“Cum for me.” He stammered. “God, you’re so wet.”

His dick pumps into you at a pace no man should reach, making you cry out for him in pleasure. You grip tightly onto his backside, struggling to keep yourself upright while he fucked you senseless to the point you lost your balance. If it weren’t for his strength, there was no way you were standing up on your own.

San was committed to making you cum first, but he becomes sloppy the closer he gets, but he doesn’t stop. “Cum for me babygirl,” he demands, “Cum for me..!”

And like a dog with a whistle, you obeyed his command and came. Your orgasm smacked you like a ton of bricks, and everything came rushing out of you all at once with no forgiveness. San followed suit with your flow, hearing the beauty of your moans and bursted inside of you. His pants were ragged, and his grunts were deep and gravely. The two of you tried to catch your breath, but the air escaped you. The two of you stood sweaty and stuck together with your juices intermingling inside of you. You were high off of all the sensations. It took you more than a second to come down off it. San collapsed into you and you did the same.

“That felt good..” He said into your skin.

You stared blankly up at the ceiling, admiring the intricate designs of old Renaissance paintings that you had never noticed until now. Your vision began to come back to you, and you were welcomed to reality once more. And the realization hit you.

“Yeah..” You responded shortly.

San pulled out of you and collided with the door beside you. sweat beading off his brow.

“About what you said earlier. About me feeling something for you?” You turned your head to look at him.

He glanced back at you with a wandering look, but still curious as to what you were going to say. “Yeah?”

“I still feel something for you, San. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t, but…” You paced yourself, swallowing your own spit to lubricate your throat as you said the words. “After everything we've been through, I don’t think I can love you..”

“Why not? You said you felt something right?”

“I do,” You paused for a moment trying your best to find the words to say it, but you took a deep breath and finally let it out.

“I…I think I fell in love with Yunho.”

TO BE CONTINUED IN

‘LOUDER THAN BOMBS’

(COMING SOON)

His Princess | (san smut)

Pairing: BadBoy!San x PerfectStudent!Reader

Synopsis: Despite his reputation and threatening appearance, you were San’s princess, and he made sure to let you know of that.

Genre: the best smut i ever wrote and lots of fluff

Word Count: 3k

Warning: unprotected sex. oral (f receiving). praise. petnames (princess, baby). overstimulating. service dom san. san is obsessed with reader, madly in love. this is both filfthy and very soft

Tag: -

A/N: i literally just wrote this, took me two hours, but i just fell down into a san brainrot and couldn’t stop myself. i didn’t expected to turn out this soft and cute and caring and smutty but it did and i’m proud of it :D

Keep reading

stranger. (m)

– hybrid tiger!yeosang × f.reader [19.9k]

– smut, angst

– an aspiring vet student, you take a volunteer job at the local circus. you enjoy it, until you notice how odd the tiger is acting. how his eyes follow you, watch you. wait, did he just nod when you asked him a question?

– content: starvation, blood, inaccurate vet procedures, circus (the mc does not condone it at all), miscommunication, injuries, death mentions, breeding kink

You stare at your thesis, picking at your hair. It’s pages long; filled with theories and hypotheses on how you can better the animal science industry, changing a whole portion of the structure. You’ve been working on it for months on end, trying your best to perfect the numbers and hopefully, presenting it to your dream graduate school.

“Still working on that paper?” San asks, holding two cups of coffee in his hands. He passes one off to you and you thank him with a tip of your baseball cap, taking a sip. You nod at the taste, eyes flicking up to him.

San’s your lab partner and your best friend, a constant by your side. He plops down next to you, glancing at your textbook. “You’ve been at it all day, time to take a break.” He pulls at his coat, tosses it across the bench next to the two of you.

“Can’t. It’s due in a few months, San. Every minute wasted is a moment that I’ll only regret. And don’t you have yours to work on?” You gesture to the space in front of him piled with research mimicking yours. He glances at them, letting out a deep sigh.

Adjusting his glasses, he begins organizing. “I do, but I know when it’s time for me to take a break. Like you, right now.” He pulls your papers away from you as you groan, lazily reaching for your documents. He gives you a pointed look, putting them back into your bag.

“Take a break, seriously. Those bags under your eyes are getting a bit too hard to look at,” he glances at you once, before beginning to pile his things away. “Why don’t you go and look at the local circus? I know you’ve been trying to shut it down for a while, so might as well see what’s really going on there.”

“It’s too obvious with these clothes on. They’ll never let me in,” You glance down at your lab coat, a pout on your lips.

“I honestly don’t think that would change much. They take the money they can get. We aren’t exactly a tourist town.”

You expressed your concerns to San constantly about the unfairness of your local circus, the animals there under the eyes of people who could care less about them. Even though there’s nothing you can do about it, you’re still stuck on it. There’s no reason for them to have exotic and big animals in there, and you’re sure their licenses are way past expired. But you know that despite it all, deep down you’re afraid; confrontation makes you queasy and you try your best to avoid it at all costs.

“Don’t you want to change the animal industry?” San points out, taking another sip of his coffee. He winces at the flavor, glancing inside the cup. “Tastes like pure grind.”

You switch with him, tasting him. Moaning in contentment, you pass him yours. He takes a sip, and nods, continuing to drink.

“What if they call the police on me or something?”

“Doesn’t your old crush Jongho work at the station?” San asks, and you feel the heat coming to your cheeks. “It’ll be fine then. He gets a boner just from looking at you, so I’m sure he’ll let you off the hook.”

“He does not get a fucking boner, you pervert,” You grumble, and San merely shrugs.

“He stumbles through his words like we’re in elementary school, and always blubbers something about doughnut puns since he’s a cop. It’s a bit embarrassing if you think about it.”

You hit his shoulder lightly and he laughs, wiggling his brows.

-

You sit on one of the benches, your coat tucked into your bag as you wait for the show to start. It’s against your morals to give anything to this piece of crap place, but your “of the moment” investigative journalism relies on you getting the scoop without being spotted. And San insisted that sneaking inside the local circus would only make matters worse, you begrudgingly agreeing. Jongho can’t save you from a bad reputation.

You’re in the far back, surrounded by dozens of people too tired from their long drives, probably seeking some reprieve from their loved ones or their stir crazy children. You listen to the cheesy music as you flick through your phone, waiting for the show to start.

Your town sits between two big cities. It’s unnoticed by the biggest television network near you, always skipped over in the weather forecast and news briefings. You’d think it didn't exist if you didn’t live here. A big reason why you’re ready to leave this silly town of yours, and see something different and new.

Since you were young, your neighbors sparingly moved away; everyone knew everyone. Being left alone was and still is, not an option. All of your partners and crushes know one another, and you never get away from San; you two are literal peas in a pod. San shares your dream of seeing the door out of this place and living a life being unknown, being able to walk down the street without saying hi to a familiar face every five seconds. The big city is the place you both want to go, and becoming a doctor seems like a big way out.

The lights dim, sliding your phone into your pocket.

The ringmaster walks out, introducing himself as Kim Hongjoong. You’re not sure if he and the Kim Family that dominates your town are related, but you keep an eye out for him, taking small notes. He’s too far away to pick out his face, but you watch in silence. Acrobats and gymnasts of all types jump and twirl around the stage, and you can’t help but respect them. It takes great strength to move their body that way.

The animals finally come out, and you lean forward, narrowing your eyes. You curse yourself for not taking a seat closer, but you digress. Monkeys play tricks for the audience who laugh in delight. You watch the dog trainer let the dogs jump and play, and the lights dim even more.

“And now it is time for our showmaker, our South Chinese Tiger!” Hongjoong shouts, taking a step back. A cage rolls out, and you tense up.

A‌ loud roar erupts throughout the crowd as a child cries. The tiger comes out with a chain around his neck, looking around the crowd. It’s huge, and it makes you wonder if it’s actually the breed that he said. They’re rare; it’s impossible and illegal to own one on your own. You see the tremors of its body, performing the tricks the trainer asks of it. You watch as the rest of the patrons leave once it ends, the laughter and music fading. Your eyes flick to a tent that says animals. You can hear San’s voice in your ear right now, telling you that this is definitely a bad idea and you should just go. But your curiosity cannot be tamed, and you need to know what’s exactly going on.

You stand outside the tent, your heart pumping in your ears. You hear the yelling of the man who takes care of the animals, loud sounds as he bangs something against the cages. You hear the monkeys squeal and whine, but surprisingly, you don’t hear the growl of the tiger. After a few moments of silence, you peek into the area, eyes flicking around for any movement of people. Making sure the coast is clear, you pull back the flap slowly, softly, closing it behind you.

You look at the tiger’s cage, surprised to see that his eyes are on yours, unmoving. You know not to antagonize him, flicking your gaze away and holding up your hands in submission. A small grunt falls from his lips, and he rests his head back down. You see the scars that cover his cheeks, the number 69 stamped into the side of his coat. You take slow steps as he watches you, making sure not to alarm him.

“What’s your name, big guy?” You ask softly, glancing around. Your eyes land on the metal plate on the bottom of his too small cage.

Yeosang.

"What are you doing here?"

You move away from the cage quickly, turning to see whoever showed up. It's a younger man, holding a small hose in his hands. He stares at you warily, covered in dirt from head to toe. He must be one of the assistants at the circus; hat and the blond hair dripping with what you can only assume is sweat. He shrugs off the hose, slowly walking towards you.

"The show closed a while ago, lady. No free behind the scenes shit."

You glance at the tiger, and his eyes are still resting on yours, as if he's waiting for you to make the next move. You hold your hands up in surrender, shaking your head.

"No, I'm not here for a free show. I saw your tiger—" You hear a low growl from the cage— "Yeosang, and I just noticed how malnourished he is, along with the other animals."

You look at Yeosang's side, his breaths quick but steady. The outline of his ribs worry you; he has to be getting way less food than he's supposed to. Tigers eat, a lot. Several pounds a day. But from the dull color of his fur and tired gaze, you can only assume that he's been given much less.

"And what's it to you? Are you the feds or something?" He asks, narrowing his eyes. "You need a warrant before coming in here."

"No, no. I'm a vet student. I'm in my last year. I'm not from the government or anything like that."

He crosses his arms against his chest. You listen to the monkeys shriek as he takes you in. Holding out a hand, he twirls his fingers in a give me motion.

"Show me your school identification."

You thank the heavens that you left it in your pocket instead of in the car like you usually do. You take it out, placing it in his hands. He looks at the ID, flicking his eyes between it and you. Passing it back to you, he sighs, scratching the hairs that fall from his cap. He glances at the animals for a moment, before speaking.

"They're beautiful, aren't they? But unfortunately, the head man doesn't care too much about their health. Just wants them to perform a little dance and sit in these tiny ass cages at the end of every show. Poor animals are probably plotting their escapes everyday."

His eyes flick to you. "I don't like the way they're treated either. But the only thing I can do is try to get some food in them and rinse them off. They probably haven't gotten their shots either." He takes off his cap, resting it on one of the standing posts.

He gestures to the tiger. "That boy there's been bred in captivity and hasn't seen the wild one day of his life. Too young to even remember his parents. And you don't see much of his species around here, or anywhere, really. South China tigers don't exist in the wild anymore."

So Hongjoong is telling the truth. He doesn't look like any of the tigers you've treated, but you just couldn't pinpoint which one he is. But those words falling from this man's lips, he is in fact, a rare tiger. One of the types that are sold on the black market for millions of dollars. And here he is rotting away in a too small cage, performing at a local zoo.

"He seems to have grown attached to you though. Never let someone that close to his cage except for me without throwing a fit. You must be good." Blondie smiles at you, cheeks plump. "Nice to meet you, by the way. My name is Wooyoung. Jung Wooyoung, but I hide the surname for people I don't know."

He holds out his hand, and you take it, shaking it lightly.

"Then why tell me?" You ask, and he clicks his tongue before speaking.

"Yeosang trusts you, so I do too."

Wooyoung goes through the procedures of what he does to treat the animals on a day basis; from their early meals, to exercise, to the end of shows. You're not sure how he even has time for himself since he's always here, the only trainer that's able to be this close to Yeosang without getting their arm bitten off. Without years of education in animal medicine, the knowledge that he has impresses you to the highest degree. He's even more educated than some of your classmates. But he explains softly that he doesn't get paid much, and he can only do with what he has in taking care of them.

"The city controls this circus. They know that our animals need more, but are too frugal and never mention it to anybody. I bet if those animal people came in they'd have a riot." Wooyoung cleans the bottom of an empty cage, monkeys watching him as he does so.

You feel Yeosang's eyes on your back but you don't turn to look at him. He's a bit strange from other ones you've interacted with, more solemn and quiet. Even the slow flip of his tail is different. But you're sure he's just curious about a new visitor, and nothing more than that.

Probably.

“We’ve been looking for more help around here,” Wooyoung mumbles, wrinkling his nose at a bit of grass one of the primates throws at him.‌‌‌ A quick point of his finger, he turns to you. “The rest of the animals don’t really need much work, but Yeosang is a bit of a mystery. He’s not too old, but he acts like a grumpy old man.”

Yeosang huffs in response, turning around in his cage. Wooyoung looks on in amusement as he gives his caretaker his back in defiance. Wooyoung looks back at you, grabbing his hat and placing it back on his head.

“I know you must be busy and all, but Yeosang needs another caretaker other than me, you know?‌ On my days off, no one dares go over to him, except for tosses of some raw meat at him and water. Not really taking care of him? I think he’s only really taken care of when I'm around. I‌ don’t think they fed him when I was gone for two days. He looked almost sickly.”

Wooyoung looks at the tiger in pity. “Even though he sleeps most of the day, he still needs food. They treat him like he’s worse than an animal, it’s disturbing.”

“Have you done anything to try and stop it?”‌ You ask, and Wooyoung looks at you sharply.

“What can I do? I’m only a lowly assistant, nothing I say would faze them. I went to the county and the sheriff, but all he did was kick me out and said mind my own business. These government people only care about the money in their pockets, they don’t care about the animals. Not like we do.”

He tilts his head. “We don’t know much about each other, that’s why I think when you come and volunteer, I can be there to watch you take care of him. At least for the first few weeks. After that, I can finally take a bit of a vacation.” Wooyoung grins widely.

You can see that he’s been trying his best to take care of them, but being a one man show could only work for so long. He’s young. You don’t know much about him, but from the passion in his eyes as he speaks about the animals, you think that’s all you need to know. It’s not his fault that he doesn’t have the resources to test and take care of them. And if you think about it, you don’t have the resources either. But helping him with the care, you’re not sure if you have the time.

Your thesis is due soon, and it takes up most of your free time. You usually have about five minutes in the day to eat dinner or chat with San. But you can see the defeat in Wooyoung’s eyes, the pure exhaustion. No one that young should look that way. He’s probably the same age as you, and looks like he’s been through Hell and back.

You nod.

“I can help you when I can. I go to school during the week, but I‌‌ can help a couple of hours a day, and during the weekend.”

His smile almost cracks his face at how wide it is.

“Did you hear that, Yeo?” Wooyoung yells, seeing the tiger’s ear twitch at his voice. “We got a new caretaker just for you buddy!”

You giggle softly at his excitement. Wooyoung finishes up his job, whistling softly at Yeosang. The tiger turns to look at him, tail still moving slowly. His eyes move to look at you. It’s a bit strange how human his eyes are, scanning yours with curiosity beyond your comprehension. You can’t quite understand how people can treat animals so harshly when they hold your eyes with such intelligence.

His large paw scratches the bottom of the cage, claws making you wince. They’re a bit overgrown; he’s supposed to have scratching posts around his cage, but it’s so small that all he can do is walk in a circle. You wish that you could do something, anything, to help him. But you suppose that being here is enough for now.

“See you later, bud. Gotta show y/n around the tents for a bit, before taking one off.” Wooyoung waves you to follow him. You take one last look at Yeosang, before closing the flap behind you.

Wooyoung walks you around the premise, introducing you to members of the circus that walk past. You see a man with bright pink hair waving at you from the top of a pole, balancing on one leg as he eats his dinner. His eyes are soft as they watch you continue on. You later learn that his name is Yunho.

Wooyoung peeks his head inside a trailer, groaning at what he sees.‌ A head full of hair pops out. He winks at you, reaching out and pressing his lips against the back of your hand. He’s the ringleader; Hongjoong. You can see he’s quite a seducer immediately upon hearing Wooyoung calling you a doctor. Wooyoung has to drag you away from him, scolding him as he does so. You’re still not sure if he’s related to the Kim’s, but at the moment you’d rather not dwell on it.

The other faces blend amongst each other, until he finally reaches the back entrance of the fairground. He leans against the fence, adjusting his cap again.

“You can come right after the performance, if you have time tomorrow.”‌ His eyes widened before taking out his phone. “Ah, can you put your number in here?” He hands you his phone and you type it quickly, giving it back to him. He nods slowly, tucking it back into his pocket.

“Thanks,” You start, and he raises a brow, “For not calling the cops on me.”

Wooyoung shrugs. “Eh, I wasn’t gonna anyway. Yeosang hasn’t eaten yet,” He winks at you, and you laugh. “I’m happy you agreed to join, Dr. y/n.”

You wave him off, your face getting warm. “Not a doctor yet. But close.”

“Close enough for me,” He turns back, waving at you. “See ya later, doc!”

He disappears into the tents, leaving you at the back entrance. You let out a small chuckle, before turning around and walking back. That night, you dream about honey eyes staring at you in the middle of the forest.

-

“A circus? You’re working at the local Kim circus?” San scoffs, shaking his head. “You know how they treat animals there, y/n.‌ It’s not a good idea to involve yourself in something like that. It’ll only lead to bad endings. One day they’re going to get raided and you’re going to go to jail.”

“Love that optimism,” You mumble, sipping on what had to be tenth coffee. “Not digging the vibes, San. You’re sounding a bit too much like those prep kids in our senior year bio class.”

“I’m sorry,”‌ he says, staring at his textbook in front of him. “I just don’t want to see you being in some shady shit. I know you want to save the animals, but sometimes you have to save yourself.”

“Choi San.”

You put your coffee to the side.

“You can’t say that when you’re the one who stopped in the middle of the highway, blocked three lanes of traffic with your body only, so that you could pick up a turtle and let him go into the river.”

He looks at you from his textbook, disgruntled. “That was necessary and you know it!"

You raise an eyebrow. “Say that to the thousands of people on that highway. I’m pretty sure you’re being sued right now by the state.”

He waves you off. “No, it’s the city. But that’s besides the point,” San pushes his book to the side, eyes on yours, “It’s weird. The only people who go to that stupid animal zoo are the tourists who stop in our town for some medallions at Jongho’s dad’s tourist trap shop. I know you want to save the world, I do, but some things are just too risky. Even more risky than me stopping three lanes of traffic.” He points out.

“San, this circus is like my turtle. I have to take care of those animals, I‌ won’t be able to live with myself if I‌ told Wooyoung no, and left him alone to fend for himself. They need someone in there who has some semblance of a clue on what they’re doing. And I know I’m not certified yet, but I‌ can still assist.”

San sighs loudly, leaning back in his chair. Before you can tell the clumsy man how bad of an idea that is, the chair cracks, and he falls backwards to the floor. People in the coffee shop look at him for a moment, before getting back to their posh coffee talks.

You lean over the table, looking down at your best friend. He gives you a sheepish look, before getting back to his feet. You hold back your grin as he situates himself, sitting back down in his spot.

“Is there any way I’ll convince you to say no?”

“Absolutely not.”

He frowns. “Well, at least take care of yourself, yea? Make sure that this is strictly volunteering, without pay. Don’t need anyone coming after you and saying that you’re accepting payment from this place,” He mumbles, adjusting his glasses.

Your phone vibrates, and you glance down at the message.

(unknown): show just finished. whenever you're ready, Yeosang needs his cage cleaned. already moved him out of the oc, so lmk if you're coming in.

You look at San. He’s right; if the town or better yet, the government decides to raid this place, it’s a big possibility that you may be somehow intertwined in politics that surround the death trap. You sigh, knowing what you’re going to say anyway. San’s right, you are soft.

(you): be there soon!‌ just have to finish up some assignments.

He messages back quickly.

(blondie): oh you actually gave me the right number? good. I'll see you soon. ^0^

You snort, tucking your phone back in your pocket. San shakes his head at you, but you ignore his pessimism. You want good energy, not the negative vibes he’s sending your way. You pack up your things, blowing him a kiss before kicking the door open to the shop, excited to see how your first day goes.

-

"Ah, y/n! You came back!" You turn your head to the bright voice, Yunho smiling at you. He's not on the top of a pole, stretching as he eats a granola bar. His eyes flick to the books in your hand. "Just came back from school, I presume?"

You nod quickly. "Yup. Work hard, get smart?" You mentally slap yourself. Yunho snorts, holding out his bar to you. Your eyes flick to his legs, noticing that he's doing a split, unfazed at your gaping mouth.

"Want some?" He waves it again, and you shake him off.

"Do you know where Wooyoung is? He told me to meet him, but I don't have the slightest idea where."

He nods, pointing behind him. "He's cleaning up the main tent, but you can just go into the animal arena. Pretty sure he wants you to be there anyway. Be careful of the poop, though. The monkeys have been out of it today. Almost got some in my hair." He touches his strands with a pout on his lips.

You thank him, walking quickly through the fairgrounds. You try your best to blend into the crowd, but your plain clothes are obvious among the colorful attire of everyone else. Many people you met yesterday give you soft hellos and smiles, and some you didn't stumble across look at you with curiosity, wondering who you are.

You slip into the tent, closing it softly behind you. Your eyes look around, dropping your books on the steps just before the sand. Animals turn to you lazily, before going back to whatever they're doing. Yeosang looks up from his spot, tail tirelessly swaying back and forth. He seems to examine your figure, eyes still sleepy. He's in the smaller cage, his bigger one a mess on the inside.

"Don't mind me, boy. Just here to help clean your cage." You glance around, and notice a broom and picker on the left side of the tent. You grab it and walk into his cage, sweeping. You feel the tiger's eyes on you the whole time; what sounds like purrs rumbling in his chest. You know that big cats couldn't purr even if they wanted to, but it's interesting to listen to him.

"So, how was the show?" You ask as you gather his droppings in a pile, glancing over at him. You're not sure why you expected him to say something but you hear a slight huff, his head dropping onto his paws. "Not good, huh? Well, I'm sure tomorrow will be better. There's some parade coming through, so there will probably be a lot of people for you to entertain."

He doesn't seem to like that idea, blinking slowly before closing his eyes.

"Yea, yea I get it. But there's nothing I can do, you know? I'm just here to help, I can’t stop the circus," you glance around the clean cage in pity. He's probably craving the vast fields to run in, desperate to hunt and be free. But he's stuck in this small cage, stuck performing to people who couldn't care about what condition he's in.

You hear the hose turn on, and you turn back quickly, seeing Wooyoung appear. He's wearing all black, hat still flipped around. He nods at you, winking at Yeosang.

"Good afternoon, y/n. Surprised you got here before me," he says, passing you the hose. You thank him, slowly rinsing away the mildew and other buildup that sticks to the bars of his cage.

"How was today's show?" You ask, and Wooyoung rubs the back of his head.

"If I'm being honest with you, big guy over here was a bit lazy. Didn't want to move at all, and the head man is a bit mad about it," Wooyoung takes a step closer to you. He glances over at Yeosang, before speaking. "Talking about putting the poor animal down. I tried my best to convince him otherwise since every person had a bad day, even tigers like our Yeosang."

“Hongjoong?” You ask, and Wooyoung raises his eyebrows in surprise.

“No, the only thing Hongjoong is in charge of is that trailer of his. Be thankful for only that.” Wooyoung turns back to Yeo. "Right, big boy? Just a bad day, huh?"

Yeosang flicks his tail in response, eyes still closed.

"Could they do that? Aren't there laws since he's an endangered animal? This can't be legal—"

"It's not," Wooyoung mumbles. "He's not sick or has a deadly contagious disease. He's not perfectly healthy, but his problems don't affect anyone or anything else. I honestly have no clue what to do," He looks at Yeosang, worry in his eyes. "Big guy is the only thing I look forward to everyday. Can't see the circus without him."

You feel terrible. Being a vet student, you know that you sometimes have to make the ultimate decision and put the animal down, for mercy. But seeing an animal that just needs a bit more food in his system being killed for simply being tired, or in a mood... It's irresponsible. The doctors at your college would have a fit.

Wooyoung and you fill up his water tub and food. You're a bit surprised at how nonchalant Yeosang is. Usually tigers would immediately smell the scent of the meat and pace around, ready to chow down. But he barely flicks an ear, head still resting on his paws. You move out of the cage as Wooyoung opens it up, moving the large barrier between you, and the tiger. He taps on Yeosang's cage as a warning, opening the small gate.

Yeosang opens his mouth in a long, loud yawn, slacking his lips together as he drags himself back to his cage. He walks past the meat, sitting in the far corner of the cage, dropping his head back into his paws.

Wooyoung sighs.

"I don't know what's up. He's been like this since you left yesterday. Not wanting to eat, to do anything. He looks a bit brighter since you've shown up, but..." Wooyoung taps on the cage. "Yeo, eat the food! There's not much around here these days."

Yeosang's ear flicks to the sound of his name, but he does nothing to move to the raw meat, breathing in and out slowly. You don't see anything odd about his vital signs, at least from where you're standing. You take a step closer to the cage, tapping lightly on the metal. Maybe talking to him would work? You know it's a long shot, but he seems to listen to Wooyoung when he wants to.

"Yeosang?" You say, and his ear twitches. "You haven't eaten all day, you know that's not good for you.“ You walk a bit closer to his cage, hands inches away from the steel bars lining his cage. His eyes open, breathing in and out slowly. “Why don’t you take a bite? For me?” You ask softly.

Wooyoung snorts behind you. “Don’t think that’ll work, y/n. He's stubborn. Never really listens to anyone but his thoughts.”

Yeosang huffs slowly, tail flicking. You point at the food, rubbing your hands together as you plead for him to eat something. He watches you for a moment, before shaking off his fur, standing and walking to the meat. He looks at you, and you nod. He takes the meat, turning and walking into the corner again.

You cheer, pulling your fist down in excitement. Wooyoung rolls his eyes at you, pointing to the other cages.

“Time for some monkey shit.” He mumbles, and you give him a strained grin as he laughs at you, guiding you along.

Soon, the two of you are covered in sweat from the manual labor. Wooyoung tosses you a wet towelette and you thank him, wiping off your forehead. Yeosang is fast asleep, ear twitching ever so often. The other animals are sleeping as well as Wooyoung walks around, dimming the lights. He gestures for you to follow him quietly in which you do, not noticing the glow of yellow eyes watching as you go.

You close and lock the door behind you, letting out a sigh of relief. Wooyoung shakes his head at you, guiding you along the grounds.

“You’ll get used to it. Animal shit sticks to you after a while,” He mumbles, sniffing his clothes. His face scrunches up at the smell, and you giggle. The smell of crap is everywhere around you, but Wooyoung never smelled like anything but hard labor.

“It’s not that bad, you always smell good, you know. Never like shit.”

You see the red rise to his ears as he looks away from you, saying nothing. You reach for your bags but he only glares at you, continuing forward.

“We’re having a welcome dinner for you. Can’t leave until you meet everyone.‌ And I’m not letting you carry these bags and books on your own. Wouldn’t be gentlemanly of me,” He explains.

“Thanks,” You say, and he gives you his cheeky smile, opening the flap of a tent. He holds it open as you dunk and enter, seeing everyone you’ve met and some unfamiliar faces across the table. They all say hello to you as Wooyoung introduces you.

Yunho waves, tapping the chair next to him. You thank him as you sit, Hongjoong across from you and Wooyoung sitting on your opposite side. Hongjoong winks, and you wink back, causing him to erupt with laughter. Yunho tsks at him, holding out a plate for you. You stare at the food in front of you, bowing again.

“Ah, stop thanking us. You’re one of the circus folk now, no need to bow.” Yunho eats his food happily, and this is the first time you’ve seen him sitting normally. “Plus, Wooyoung has a bit of a crush on you, so you’ll be in the family soon enough.”

He leans away from Wooyoung’s grabby hands, laughing loudly. Wooyoung mumbles some obscenities underneath his breath, shaking his head.

“I hate the performers,”‌‌ he grumbles, chewing on some rice.

“Thanks,” You ignore the glare Yunho shoots at you,“For inviting me into your family. It’s nice to see so many welcoming people,”‌ You grin at the people around you.

Hongjoong stands at that, “Ah, toast to the new lady!‌ Hopefully she’s here for more than a few days!” He laughs, and everyone follows along with him, tapping their plastic cups against one another. You laugh along with them, taking a sip.

-

Months pass by before you know it. Your free time is spent at the fairgrounds, already on friendly terms with everyone. Even Hongjoong, his teasing with you endless, and Yunho and his strange sitting positions. Once, you saw him hanging from ropes as he ate rice upside down. Wooyoung and you even text everyday, his feelings for you dissipating into more of a friendship. Although Yunho constantly insisted that Wooyoung was never over it, there aren't any signs that say otherwise. He hasn’t even asked you on a date.

You don’t mind it; schooling occupies most of your time.‌ San and you studied for hours on end, sometimes drooling onto your work into the early morning. And now, as you wait for your grades and acceptances or rejections to your graduate schools, you bite your lip, eyes on the computer. They said it would be released at ten a.m., and it’s already five minutes past.

“Relax,” San says, sipping his green tea. But you notice at how anxiously he taps his feet, eyes glued on his laptop. “It’s a lot of grades to put out at once, you know? They’re probably doing it in batches.”

Your laptop shakes on the table as San rocks his leg, and you glare at him over your shake. “How about stop shaking that leg so I can concentrate on the results, huh? You’re making my head hurt.”

He stops, offering you an apologetic look. You roll your eyes, refreshing your page again.‌ A gasp falls from your lips as you push your drink to the side, eyes glued on the screen. San comes over, looking at the laptop.

“Oh shit.”‌‌ he says, cheeks lifting into a grin. You both scream, pulling into each other’s arms and laughing loudly. There’s several people who shush the two of you, but you’re too excited to pay much mind.

San’s laptop dings as well, and he almost spills his tea at the results.‌ Another scream, and the waiters are telling you two to shut up before they kick you out. You grab your belongings, shoving it into your bag and running out with San.

“Holy shit, what the fuck-”

“Choi fucking San, we got accepted to the best vet school in the country. What the fuck?!” You scream, and pull each other into your arms again.

“Drinks?” He asks, eyes bright. You nod quickly, before you remember your volunteering. San sees the drop in your eyes. “Gotta go to the circus, huh?” He asks, tilting his head. “No worries, we can go another time.”

You bite your lip. “No. I’ll just text Wooyoung and tell him another time. We only get accepted into our dream colleges once in a lifetime. Can’t push that aside.” You say, wiggling your eyebrows at him before messaging a quick sorry to Wooyoung, before running off with San, screaming into the night.

-

“The university is only a few towns over,” San mumbles over his sparkling lemonade. You two sit in your living room, laughing at the TV while sipping non-alcoholic drinks. When San and you go out for drinks, it only means that you sit in your living room and drink whatever’s in the fridge.

“That means that technically, you don’t have to buy a new apartment. You can still live here and just commute,” he explains, but you shake your head, taking a sip of your water.

“Absolutely not. I know it’s more expensive, but being here any longer will only give me back cramps.” You mutter, rubbing your lower back for emphasis. San rolls his eyes as you continue. “And we dreamed of getting out of here, San, I don’t want to stay here longer than I have to.”

“What are you going to say to the circus then?” He asks softly.

You blink, putting down your cup. He’s right, and you’ve been trying to push that to the back of your mind. But it’s better to just tell Wooyoung and get it over with, rather than waiting until the very end to say something. He’d only be more annoyed with you if you waited until the last second. You’ll miss spending time at the circus, even if you won’t admit it out loud. They’ve become your home away from home.

Even the animals have grown to like you. The monkeys squeal in delight when you arrive, letting you groom them without much protest. Even Yeosang, the aloof tiger, lets you brush his hairs. He even licks your hand, even as you stick out your tongue in disgust. You haven’t seen them in a couple of days because of finals, but they’re always the highlight of your week. You’re not sure if you’d get over not seeing Yeosang anymore. You glare at San.

“Don’t make the mood drop, asshole.”

“Fine, but you know I’m right.”

“Yea, yea.”

Your phone rings, and you glance down. Furrowing your eyebrows, you answer it quickly.

“Hey Woo-”

“y/n, I need you here right now.” You can hear the panic in his voice, and you stand quickly, grabbing your coat as you listen to him. “Yeosang’s not listening to any of us, and he’s been avoiding food. He hasn’t eaten since you've last been here, and we all don’t know what to do. You're the only one that we thought we could call, and I know you're busy but we ran out of options.”

“It’s okay! I’ll be there in about ten minutes. Just hang on a bit, alright?”

He agrees and you hang up the phone, tucking it into your back pocket. San watches as you quickly pack up your things, grabbing your first aid. He stumbles from the couch, grabbing his coat as well.

“San, the tiger, is sick. He’s not eating and he’s probably acting really aggressive because of it. Wooyoung just called me and I have to go there-”

“I’m coming with you,”‌ San says simply. “It’ll be better if two almost-vets are there, rather than one. We can see what’s up with him and hopefully diagnose him.”

You send him a thankful look, running out with him close behind you.

-

You pull the flap to the side, eyes flicking around. His low growls fill the room, and you quickly walk over to Wooyoung. He stands there worried, glancing at you. His expression loosens slightly at your appearance, before flicking to San.

“Who’s the newbie?”

“San,” You say, “He’s here to help me figure out what’s wrong.”

You look at the growling tiger in question. His eyes narrow on you, flicking between you and San before settling on Wooyoung.

“He’s been like this for days. Never listening to us, going on and on and growling. I gave him a treat a few days ago, a deer, and it’s still in there. I tried grabbing it while he was sleeping, but he tried pouncing on me.”‌ Wooyoung rubs his arm, and you glance down, seeing blood run down his wrist.

You pull him to the side, taking out your human first aid. He scoffs, trying to pull away but you merely glare at him, pulling his arm back.

“You can’t just walk around a predator’s cage with a bleeding arm. And you know that this could get seriously infected, right?"

"Did you check his temperature? Usually tigers in the wild could last days without food, did you give him a big meal before?"

Wooyoung shakes his head, San looks at him curiously. You clean off Wooyoung's arm, putting small butterfly stitches on the wound.

"He's never attacked me before," Wooyoung says, eyeing San as he takes steps closer to Yeosang. He keeps enough distance as to not scare him, but you see the tenseness in his body as he keeps his eyes on your best friend.

"Yeo isn't one to fight. Thought he might have a bug or something."

"San, don't get any closer. Helooks like he wants to bite your arm off," You look at him, worried. "Yeo's a bit unpredictable right now, it's best to stay away until we figure it out."

Yeosang looks at you, then stares at you cleaning up Wooyoung. You don't see anything obvious on him, it's probably something that you just can't pinpoint with a look. You nod at Wooyoung, before walking over to San.

"Think it can be a bug or something?" You ask softly, staring at Yeosang as he walks away from the both of you, sitting in a small grass patch in his cage, flicking his tail quickly. He's anxious or annoyed, that much you can tell.

"When I got close to him, I didn't see any marks. And he would have been scratching if it's really a bug. His coat is in good condition and he seems much healthier than you last described. Maybe he's just in a bad mood? You haven't seen him in a few days, right?"

You roll your eyes. "He's a tiger, San. He doesn't care if I'm gone."

A roar erupts from Yeosang's mouth, clawing on the grass. San sighs.

"Seems like the big guy disagrees, huh?"

You look at the meat laying closer to the cage, and you grab it. Yeosang watches your every move, body still tense. He's never been like this with you, so you can't help but be confused at his actions. You know that he's healthy from what you can see, although you'd love to give him a shot and sedate, see if anything is physically wrong with him. But you don't have the luxury; only certified doctors carry that, and neither you or San is qualified.

You feel Wooyoung and San standing close behind you, and you turn back. "Guys, he's a bit anxious right now so I think it's best if you back up a bit. Give him some room to breathe."

The guys grunt at your words but follow your instructions, taking steps backwards. Once they're several more feet away, you look back at Yeosang. His movements are more calm now, and you sigh in relief.

"Hey bud. I know I haven't been here in a few days to see you. I'm sorry. I've been busy with school and all, but I'm here now okay? Why haven't you been eating?"

You hold up the meat in your hand. "I know you didn't eat much last time, but you gotta eat this, okay? It's good for you."

Yeosang doesn't move.

"I won't leave you again. I'll come by more often, alright?" You feel a bit guilty at your words, knowing you're leaving soon. But he can't read your mind, he's just an animal. "Just eat some food, okay? You gotta be a big and healthy boy for me." You glance back at the guys, and lean forward. "And you're my favorite friend, just saying. These guys behind me? Lame."

San snorts at your words. "I can't believe you're putting a tiger above me."

You put a finger to your lips, hushing him. You place the meat at the edge of the cage, sliding your hand between the bars before stepping back.

"Trust me, Yeosang. You need to eat, you can't starve yourself while I'm not here."

Yeosang huffs. You watch him as he shakes off his coat, slowly coming to the edge of the cage. He sniffs at the meat, before picking it up with his teeth and walking back. He chews on it, eyes flicking up to yours ever so often. You breathe in relief, turning back to the others. They stare at you, mouths agape.

"Are you some animal whisper?" Wooyoung says, eyes wide. "Can you speak to tigers?"

You laugh, shaking your head. "Yeosang's not some ordinary tiger. All you have to do is speak to him like he's one of us and he'll listen. Hopefully over the next few days we won't see anything strange happening with him. I just think he was nervous." You shrug.

"Cause you were gone." Wooyoung says simply. "He's grown to be your right hand tiger, doc. Can't leave the circus now." Wooyoung grins.

San exchanges a look with you, before clearing his throat. "I'll be in the car if you need me, y/n. Let you guys talk it out."

Wooyoung raises his eyebrows in confusion as San quickly walks away, not before tripping over a rock as he does so. But he doesn't look back, quickly closing the flap behind him.

"Why is he in such a rush?" Wooyoung asks, shaking his head. "Your friend is strange."

"I have something to speak to you about, Wooyoung." You glance at Yeosang. "Outside, preferably."

Yes, he's a tiger. And yes, he doesn't know anything that you're saying and there's really no reason for you to speak outside because he wouldn't understand anyway. But those eyes are a bit too curious, it makes you wonder if he could comprehend every word that falls from your lips.

Wooyoung closes the flap behind him, arms resting against his chest as he looks at you. "Quitting?" He asks simply. "I know you have school, so I presumed this would have happened sooner rather than later."

You nod, rubbing the back of your neck. "I honestly didn't expect my favorite grad school to pick me, I thought I would've stayed at a more local college. But this one is too far away for me to come back and forth everyday." You look at him sheepishly. "I love working here, I do. But—"

"But you have a chance to have those big town dreams, darling. I’m not going to stop you from living your life, doc." His smile stretches across his cheeks. "Plus we're going to need your help when you get back. Yeosang is going to miss you while you're gone."

You don't have the heart to tell Wooyoung that you don't plan on coming back here. That you plan on staying as far away as you can from this town of yours, leaving it in the dust. And seeing Yeosang struggle with being separated from you for a few days, you're a bit concerned when he realizes that you won't be able to come back.

"Do you think I should tell Yeo?" You ask softly. Wooyoung purses his lips for a moment, before speaking.

"No. As you know, he's a big ol 'ball of sensitivity. Would probably starve himself until you come back. It's best to stay away and not tell him. Saying goodbye like normal isn't going to hurt though." Wooyoung looks down at his dusty shoes, trying his best to hold back his true feelings. He's grown attached to you being here so often, but it's not a shock that you're leaving. He just didn't expect it to be so soon. He thought he had more time to spend with you.

"I'll miss you, y/n. Really." He says, looking up at you. You see the blush rise on his cheeks but you say nothing. "You've been a delight around here; everyone loves when you pop in. And circus people are pretty picky. Including myself." He takes his cap off, clutching it between his fingers. "I thank you y/n. From the bottom of my heart and soul. You helped me take care of these animals, and without you, they would've been very ill. You are a caring and loving lady, and I know you will be an amazing veterinarian. I wish you the best of luck."

Shit. You can feel the tears tugging at the corners of your eyes, but you take a big breath, holding them back. It's too early in the night to cry.

"Thank you, Woo. Truly."

He winks.

—

The last couple of weeks go by quickly. You spend as much time as you can with Yeosang; watching him as he practices his tricks with his trainer and staying at almost every show. You can see that he's loosened up quite a bit, his roars less exhausted and more rambunctious. You giggle when he huffs and whines at Wooyoung, and brushes his coat while he's deep in sleep. You know it'll only hurt more when you leave him there, but you hope that he's not as attached as you are to him. Hoping that he just sees you as another trainer at the circus.

Hongjoong makes your farewell party in his style. Overdramatic, inviting every single person that has gotten into contact with you and more. You insist that he'd not throw one, but he ignored your pleas, confetti everywhere as you stared at him in annoyance. You've grown to love his crazy behavior, as much as you scold him for it. Yunho cries as you say your last goodbyes, pushing his head into your shoulder and letting out dramatic sobs. You only pat him and laugh, wiping away your tears. But separating from Wooyoung has to be the worst.

He holds his hand between his hands as you pull him into a hug, and you feel the trembling of his body as he tries to hold back his cries. You kiss his cheek and tell him that you'll message and call all the time, at least twice a week. He's become one of your best friends, and you're sure you won't even lose contact with him.

But the one encounter you aren't looking forward to is saying goodbye to Yeosang. You hold your breath outside of his tent, trying your best to control your face. He's an animal, yes, but he can sense when something is troubling you, and you'd rather not upset him. But sitting outside his cage as he sleeps only makes your chest clench.

"Hey, big boy Yeo," You whisper. You see his ear twitch, but he makes no move to open up his eyes.

"Gotta say goodbye. I won't be here for a few days because of... testing, but you better be a good boy for Wooyoung and the others. I'm counting on you to eat your food all the time, and not give any trouble. No temper tantrums, alright? I'll be back as soon as I can."

You close your eyes, feeling your voice begin to crack. "I love you, you know that right? You're my favorite tiger, Yeosang. No one can ever replace you. I'll see you in a bit, alright?" You stand, glancing one last time at your sleeping tiger, before jogging out, your sobs too much for you to hold back anymore.

—

"Already at my place! I'll see you when, next week?" San asks through the video call. You nod, munching on an apple.

You already packed up all of your belongings, just a few essentials before you leave for your new apartment. You've lived in this one your whole adult life, but you've decided that it's time to move on. Freshen up, and see the big world out there.

"Yup. Don't eat all of those candies your mom gave you, San. I'll fight you if you do."

"Kinky," he mumbles, and you roll your eyes. He laughs loudly, mentioning something about cleaning up before you say your goodbyes, hanging up the phone.

You put your phone on the charger, flopping yourself back into your bed, tossing the apple in the trash. It's been a few weeks since you've seen the circus, and your heart aches, but you don't dare to go back. Not when you know you'd probably want to stay.

You glance at time, rubbing your eyes. It's already almost midnight, and you still have a few things to unpack. But your head is throbbing and you're too tired to even think straight. You flick off the lamp next to your bed, throwing the cover over your face. Your eyes flutter close, and you hope that you can get think about that home renovator fucking you to Tuesday. But of course, nothing actually goes as planned.

The doorbell rings, and you let out a huff, screaming internally as you throw the blanket to the side and stomp to the door. Not bothering to even look in the peephole, you fling it open.

"What?"

Your eyes move up to the person standing there. Before you can yell again, he jumps into your arms, making you stumble backward into your apartment. The door shuts behind the two of you as you scream, enveloped in this man's embrace.

"I'm calling the police!" You scream, pushing him off of you. He falls back, landing on the floor.

You stay still, eyes on him. A light yellow, almost honey like color looks back at you. Scars cover his cheeks, and you see something on his neck. A tattoo, maybe? He's too far away to tell, and you'd rather not get close. He has a nose piercing, two small silver rings in his left nostril. His clothing is a bit small on him, shirt fitting like skin and pants high above his ankles. A distinct mark on his temple feels all too familiar. His eyes flutter, before his smile slowly goes away.

"Why did you leave me?" He asks simply.

"Get out of my house right now, and I won't call the police." You'd make a run for it, but you have no idea if he has a weapon on him.

His eyes look up at you, and you can't tell if it's mock innocence or not. He stumbles to his feet, your eyes flicking to something moving behind him. You tilt your head, and a tail appears. You stumble back, hitting your back on the counter.

"Shit," You curse, a small whine falling from your lips. You grab the pot from behind you, holding it out in defense as he moves closer. "I don't know who the hell you are, or why you're in my house, but you need to go. Now."

He shakes his head. "I can't go back there, y/n. Not without you. You left me without saying goodbye." Moist eyes look at you. "And you do know me. You're the one that's been with me for months, y/n. How can you forget me?"

You see his hair twitch, and you narrow your eyes. Fluffy triangles peek out of his long, soft orange locks. You blink quickly. No.

No fucking way are those ears.

"Who are you?" You say again, and he narrows his eyes. "How do you know my name?"

"How can you forget me so easily?"

His velvety voice rumbles through the room. He sighs, pulling down his shirt and turning his neck so you can see what's there. A sixty-nine is in his skin; burned into it rather than traditionally tattooed. You can see a faint outline of a scar that follows the dark letters. You only know one tattoo that looks the same as his, and you shake your head, hand trembling as you hold the pot.

"No, you can't be."

He smiles softly. "It is me. Why don't you believe me?"

The tail comes out, rubbing his thigh absentmindedly. You feel like your world is slowly ending as you take him in. You can't forget those eyes that stared at you with intelligence beyond just a simple animal’s. But it's not possible. This can't be Yeosang standing in front of you.

"What's your name?" You ask. "I need to know if it's really you."

"Yeosang." He says simply. "I am a South Chinese Tiger hybrid. I am half man, half beast. And you are y/n, the trainer that used to come in about three times a week to take care of me alongside Wooyoung. Although recently, she has left without a trace."

It's him. You know it's him from the mischievous look in his eyes, to the scars and markings across his skin that are too similar to ignore. He's your tiger. It all makes no sense but you can’t quite come up with another solution.

You drop the pot slowly. "How... How are you a human, Yeosang?"

He furrows his eyebrows, deep in thought. "I would rather not talk about that, if you don't mind." He has two sets of ears, the human ones on the sides, and the animal ones on the top. You can't help but stare at his animal attributes, too fascinated to continue to question him.

"Why didn't you say goodbye? You told me that you would never leave, y/n. You said that you would always come back. But then I heard Wooyoung talking to Yunho about you leaving the town, and I couldn't take it anymore. I had to come and see why you're leaving me."

You hear the desperation in his voice as he looks at you. Your head is so confused; trying your best to process that your tiger is now a fully functioning human hybrid, and that he's standing in your apartment. And you can't help but notice the sharp edges to his features, the thick brows and clenched jaw line. You glance at Adam's apple moving before you shake your head. He's handsome.

Get out of your thoughts, you think.

"I never planned on staying there, Yeosang—"

"Don't call me that." He says sharply. "Call me Yeo."

You tsk. A low growl rumbles in his chest, and your eyes widen. "Yeo...?"

He sighs in satisfaction as you continue.

"I don't want to be here anymore. I always planned on going to the city for college, taking a job there and moving away from this town. I've hated it here. I can't stand being in this place. It makes me sick, if I'm being honest with you."

"This is our home," Yeosang says simply. "How could you leave our home?"

"Did you like being there, at the circus? Stuck in a cage all day, and then performing for people?"

His ears lower as he looks away, tail swaying slightly. "I am grateful that I'm not dead. Luxuries of open fields and hunting like a true beast are desires, but I've accepted that I'm not ever going to have that. And that's okay."

Your brain is foggy as you strain to keep yourself awake for the conversation. Yeosang seems to notice your tiredness as he looks at you with concern.

"You should rest, y/n."

"Are you going back to the circus?" You ask, and he raises his brows as if you'd asked a stupid question.

"Why would I do that? You're here, I'm not leaving you."

Oh no. You did not sign up to babysit a handsome tiger man, you're leaving for school. The last thing you need is the government coming to you and arresting you for holding back a rare creature. You rub your face, knowing that you won't refuse him because one; you're a punk and two; no one in their right mind would believe a word that you say about a hybrid tiger.

"Have you eaten today?" You ask softly. He furrowed his eyebrows, deep in thought.

"No, but I can wait. I can wait until you're ready to prepare something else. I don't want to be a burden on you."

You shake your head. "No, I'll grab you something from the kitchen and we can figure out whatever's going on right now." You glance on your TV, flicking it on. "Do you mind waiting in here while I go and grab you something?"

He shakes his head, sitting softly on the edge of the cushions. He looks back at you with those curious eyes of his, before turning to the TV in front of him. You see his tail rest lightly next to him as his eyes focus on the late night cartoons.

You walk into the kitchen, grabbing some leftovers out of the fridge and heating them in the microwave. You sit on the edge of the counter as you wait, legs swinging back and forth slowly. It's too late to think about how Yeosang became what he is, or how he found your home. You're not sure if you want to tell San about what's happening; afraid that he'd only laugh and brush it off. You want to believe that the man in your living room is lying to you, but you know it's not true. That's your Yeosang, no matter how much you deny it.

The beep pulls you out of your thoughts, and you jump down, grabbing the food and a fork. You walk into the living room, eyes flicking to the TV. A news report is running, and you almost drop the food in your hands.

Local Circus Tiger Missing from Its Habitat.

Yeosang gladly takes the food from your hands as your eyes stay glued to the program.

"Trainer reports that he heard a large cracking sound before running into the tent, seeing the coveted rare South Chinese Tiger gone. The cage was in stable condition, and no one suspects that the tiger has left on his own. Since it is one of the very few left in the world, many suspect that it was stolen. Police are currently searching the area for a trace of where this tiger named Yeosang has gone. As a precaution, please stay in your homes and do not go outside unless absolutely necessary, in case this tiger is on the loose. If spotted, please contact the police immediately and do not engage. This is..."

You look at Yeosang as he munches happily, fingers scooping the food from the bowl without a care in the world. You sit next to him, making sure not to land on his tail. You've got a rogue tiger in your apartment, and the city is searching everywhere for him. You glance at Yeosang's ears, letting out a sigh.

He pauses in scarfing down his food, cocking his head towards you. His ears twitch as he looks at you. "No one will find me here." He explains. "I'm a human now, they can't tell it's me, you don't need to worry."

"Yeosang, you should go back." You say, and he freezes completely at your words. "Being here, with me... this isn't where you belong, Yeo. You deserve more than what I can provide. You need to go back home."

"That's not my home." He states simply, licking his fingers. You pass him a wet towelette, and he stares at it, before wiping his fingers.

"This isn't your home either—"

"Yes it is."

"Yeosang—"

"My home is where you are, y/n," he looks at you seriously. "You are my mate, I'm not leaving you. I can't leave you."

You blink quickly. Mate? There's so many meanings and ways to take that, but your lids are so heavy and you can't quite think straight this late. You rub your face, tapping your cheeks to wake yourself up.

"Let's talk about this tomorrow, alright? We both need sleep. Do you mind sleeping here? I don't have another bed for you, Yeo."

"Can I not sleep with you?" He asks, following you to the kitchen with the bowl in his hand. You point as he drops it, and instructs him on how to wash his hands. As he scrubs, you answer.

"It's... complicated. Humans don't do that with people they don't know well. It's kind of, for being together?" You're not quite sure how to explain it to him, since, as you're watching him scrub his hands, he's not exactly... Human. You grab his hand as you see him scrubbing a bit too hard, probably close to tearing his skin.

He looks at you in confusion. "Are we not together?"

"Not in that way." You say simply. You see the curiosity in his eyes but he doesn't push you further, nodding slowly.

"Do you have a cage that you want to put me in then?" He asks softly, eyes cast downward. You see his ears drop as he waits for you to guide him to one. How long has he lived as a tiger? It seems like he's never been a human, mind still stuck in his animal body.

You shake your head. "I'm not putting you in a cage, Yeo. You can use the blankets I have on the couch and sleep."

His ears perk up. "So no cage?"

"No cage."

His grin spreads across his cheeks as he pulls you into a hug, thanking you softly at your hospitality. You wrap your arms around him slowly, head tucked into his chest. He smells like rain mixed with the outdoors, natural and fresh. You pull away slowly, before gesturing to the couch.

"I'll be in my room if you need me. Don't do too much damage around here while I sleep, alright?"

He blinks slowly, before nodding. "I won't do anything like that to my trainer."

"I'm not your trainer anymore, Yeo. And you're a human now. You don't need anyone to own you or train you, alright?" You say sternly. He wiggles his head up and down quickly. You flick off the TV, whispering a soft goodnight to him before walking into your own room and closing the door slightly.

Your head is spilling over with how many thoughts you have, but your exhaustion hits deeper than curiosity, immediately shutting your eyes closed.

—

Yeosang stands in the living room, tail flicking around anxious as he stares at the couch in front of him. How do humans sleep? He hasn't been one in a while, and he's not too sure how to do anything. The strange look that you gave him when he was eating out of the bowl is enough to tell him that he's not humaning correctly. You're already fast asleep, your soft snores making his tiger ears twitch. He moves the blanket to the side, slowly lying his body down as he stares at the ceiling.

A part of him misses the smell of the tent; enveloped with the sounds of the other animals around him as he slept. Opening his eyes to see you almost everyday, taking care of him in every way that you could. The way your eyes brightened up when he followed an instruction you said without much effort on your part. How you called him your big boy, your eyes shining lightly on him. Ever since you've entered the tent he couldn't keep you out of his mind.

He used to wake up every morning, ready to follow the same routine. Wooyoung grooms him, feeds him, he performs, he eats again, and he sleeps. He cares for Wooyoung, but the repetitiveness of his life dragged on, and he isn't sure how long he's been doing that same thing. But hearing your laughter as you practiced your jokes on him, your soft cries after the stress of a test got to you, and your content gaze as you read a book to him. You've changed everything, and once you left; things weren't the same.

Wooyoung didn't tell him anything, not one word fell from his lips. Not even a mention that you won't see him again.

Yeosang rubs his face, pulling the blanket over his body. He's not sure how he'll be able to rest, knowing you're in the room next to him. He breathes in the scent of you in the fabric, comforting to his nose, calming his rising heart. Your mere presence makes his anxiousness go away; he's not sure if he'll ever be able to leave you. His mate.

His.

—

The bright sun shines down on you as you tighten your lids, letting out a strained groan before blinking slowly. You try to stretch, but a grip on your body keeps you in place. You blink once.

Twice.

His body is pressed against yours, soft breaths tickling the hairs on your neck. His grip on you is strong, your behind pressed up against him with no room for surprises. You feel his fingers resting just above your crotch, lightly holding you. Before you could turn around and yell at him for being in your bed, you feel it.

His morning wood presses lightly against your ass. You try pulling away, but he groans softly. His tongue drags across the skin below your ear, hips lightly humping you. You feel your face flush as he continues licking and pressing himself into you, hands slowly sliding lower. You finally struggle out of his arms, and his eyes lazily open, looking at the panicked look in your eyes.

He furrows his eyebrows, cocking his head. “y/n? Are you okay?”

“I… fine, I’m fine.”

He reaches out to you but you take a step back. His eyes flick to the small movement, pressing his lips in a straight line. “I’m sorry if coming into your bed made you uncomfortable. I didn’t see anything wrong with it, but I’ll try not to do it again.” He rubs the back of his neck, shrugging his shoulders. “Where is the restroom?”

“Down the hallway,” You point, and he nods, dropping your blanket back on the bed. “There’s a blue toothbrush in there. Do you know how to do that?” You avert your eyes as you ask, the heat coating your cheeks.You hear him scoff softly.

“I’m a tiger hybrid, y/n. Not a child.” He disappears down the hallway away from you.

You grab your toothbrush off your side table, avoiding the bathroom and walking into the kitchen. As you brush your teeth over the sink, you stare out the small window, deep in thought. You’re not sure what to do. There’s only a matter of time before someone comes knocking on your door, and if they see Yeosang; tail and all, it’ll only lead to more questions with little answers. Neither of them you have to give.

“I wasn’t sure where to put the brush, so I left it on your sink,” Yeosang says, walking into the room. Thankfully, there’s no more boner, but you’re still annoyed. “I’m sorry if I offended you.” He confesses. “I should have controlled my instincts better, I’m no longer a full tiger.”

“Why did you come into my room?” You ask.

“I… I couldn’t sleep there alone. And your scent swirls in the air. It’s comforting, but that wasn’t enough. I needed to know that you were okay, so I followed where your scent was strongest and rested with you. I haven’t been a human in a whole, so I didn’t realize that something like this would offend you. I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.”

You see the regret on his face as he looks at you, and you nod. He’s learning, he’s trying his best and you can’t fault him for that. “I forgive you. Just, next time ask if you can sleep with me, Yeo. I would’ve had a heart attack…” If you didn’t wake me up with your humping. But you think it’s best to not talk about it. If he doesn’t remember, then you’ll just forget about it. He’s still a tiger, after all.

You rub your neck, the feeling of him licking your skin still there. You glance at his tight clothing, shaking your head. “Let’s get you out of those clothes-”

Your doorbell rings, and you tense up. You look back at him, pointing to your room. “Close the door and stay in there until whoever it is leaves. Some of San’s clothes are in my drawers, just grab one of them, alright?”

Yeo widens his eyes, “y/n-”

You shush him, watching as he disappears, tail following behind him.

You open the door slowly, eyes glancing up. His brown hair is as messy as usual, a bright smile on his face as he tips his hat to you. His dimples shine at you softly. His belt rests low on his hips, and you glance at the police officer badge that rests on his chest.

“Haven’t seen you in a while, y/n.” He smiles at you, tilting his head. You like seeing him, but you have other crises to deal with. His eyes flick behind you for a moment, before looking back at you. “H-How are you?”

You raise an eyebrow at the stutter. “I’m good, how are you? Still dealing with Jihoon and his wife?”

Jongho rubs his face, sighing loudly. “He keeps on bothering that tattoo parlor guy, you know? And then he comes to us and talks about his wife, I don’t think the boys want to hear about it anymore.”

You giggle, shaking your head, “Well, hopefully he’ll stop soon. So, what’s up? Here to arrest me, sir?”

You see the blush creep up his neck as he laughs awkwardly, scratching the back of his head and looking away, “Ah, you jokester. No, I presume you’ve heard about the missing tiger from the Kim’s Circus.”

Your blood runs cold as you try your best to keep a poker face as he continues.

“Yeoyang, I believe his name is?”‌‌ He frowns. “I’m not really sure, Wooyoung was in a panic and I couldn’t quite understand him. But then he mentioned you and I know you're doing that veterinarian thing, and-”

“You think I know where a thousand pound tiger is?”

"You know I have to check all of my bases," Jongho mumbles. "I know you'd never hide a tiger—" your eye twitches— "but I have to check anyway. Plus the guys at the station won't let me live it down if I didn't come up here." He looks at you sheepishly. "We haven't seen each other in a bit, do you mind inviting me in for some coffee?"

He tilts his head to the side, smiling softly at you. Any other day you would immediately say yes and invite him in, but from the loud drop in your room and thankfully, he didn't hear it, you have to resist his little dimples. You shake your head.

"I can't today Jong, I'm sorry. But maybe some other time? Raincheck?"

He nods quickly, smile never fading. "Of course! I didn't mean to bother you, I'll be on my way." He glances behind you again. "Call me if you see anything suspicious or get weird phone calls. Usually, there's someone who contacts people close to the animal and bribes in exchange for its safety. We can't have that, now, can we?"

You sense a shift in his tone as he looks at you. You've known each other for years, so he could probably notice that you're on edge, but just not know about what exactly. And you're thankful that Yeosang hasn't come out of the room.

"I'll tell you guys immediately, no questions asked."

"Good, well I'll see you around, y/n. Tell San I said hello!" He tips his hat once before turning around, walking down your steps.

You waved goodbye, closing the door softly. You hate to lie to him, and you honestly wish you could tell him the truth about Yeo. But it's best to be safe and not mention anything about him to anyone, unless absolutely necessary. Putting him in danger is the last thing you want to do. You wouldn't forgive yourself if he got caught or worse.

"Is he gone now?"

You jump at Yeosang's voice, turning to him. He stands there, soft yellow eyes narrowed as he looks at you. His face is scrunched up in disgust, eyes flicking over your figure.

"You smell like him," He moves a strand of hair away from your face. The featherlight touch of his fingers makes you shiver, his eyes still focused on yours. "Did he touch you?"

"No. And it doesn't matter if he did, anyway," You grumble, walking around him.

You don't see the way his jaw clenches, eyes closing to hold back his frustration. It isn't your fault; you don't know the meaning of a mate. Tigers usually have several in their lifetime, but he hasn't ever been moved by anyone other than you. And because of your human instincts, you don't even notice his advances. He thought it would be easier because you're a veterinarian, but it seems more complicated. He lets out a soft sigh, before following you to the kitchen.

"Where are you going to go after this?" You ask, drinking your water slowly.

He cocks his head to the side. "Where will I go? After what?"

You gesture to the boxes around you. "I'm moving out, Yeosang. I'm going to my graduate school soon. I can't stay here and babysit you."

His folded hands tighten slightly. "I'm not a baby, or a child. I am a hybrid y/n; just because I haven't been a human for long doesn't mean anything. I can take care of myself. I don't understand why you're being like this." He rubs his eyes, shaking his head. "You don't remind me of the y/n that took care of me. You seem distant."

Did he expect you to be filled with joy at seeing your tiger as a human? He's handsome, no doubt, but you have goals, things you want to do. And he's just a roadblock. You thought that you'd move on from the circus and explore bigger things. But him sitting there, tail resting behind him and two pairs of ears, all you can think about is the problems he brings you. Is that being selfish? Maybe. But you've been selfless your whole life. Caring about yourself once in a while is self care.

"I... Yeo—"

"Do you not respect me as a human?" His eyes widen as a realization hits him. "You've always been comfortable with telling me your feelings and ideas when I couldn't speak back properly, but now that I can, you're afraid."

"I'm not afraid of you."

"You are afraid of me,” his gaze flicks down to his hands, “You don't care for me the same way. Ever since I've walked into here, you've treated me like I am a stranger to you. I can see why this might be a bit scary, but I don't know if I can handle the space between us." He stands up, glancing around. You gave him some of San’s clothes that he left behind, and he wears it loosely on his figure, a bit too big on him. He closes his eyes for a moment, before opening them again. “I can leave.”

“Yeo-”

“I don’t want to be in a place where I’m not wanted, y/n. It’s okay, I’ll leave.” He nods once at you, before glancing down at his clothing. “I know you feel more comfortable with me not being able to say anything, and that’s okay. Your care is my utmost priority, and I was being foolish, not seeing it last night. I can hear your heartbeat and feel your anxiety, but I assumed it was just from excitement.” His lips twitch. “I don’t want to be a burden on you.”

“Yeosang, can you just listen to me for a second?” You say, your irritation growing. He stops talking, looking at you.

“This is all new to me, okay?‌ I don’t, I didn’t expect all of this to happen, alright? I never thought that you would ever be a human, and I’m honestly just confused and yes, I am afraid.‌ But not of you, just this situation. But I don’t want you to think I hate you or dislike you, because I‌ don’t. I just… I’m not sure how to deal with this. And yes, a part of me just wants you to disappear and go away. But now, I think, if you want, you can come with me to the city. My apartment has three bedrooms there, so you’ll be able to fit in there comfortably.”

His ears perk up at your words.

“I know it’ll take me a while to get used to you being you, and I’m sorry about the way I’ve been acting.” You smile at him softly. It’s been less than a day, but you’ve already grown a bit attached to him. It’s not like you want him to go, you’re just terrified. What if the people who made him half human, half tiger saw the news? They’re probably looking for him, and he could be in danger right now.

“It’s quite alright, and I wouldn’t mind going there with you.” He isn’t going to mention the mate thing for a while. He’s noticed that you avoid the topic. You haven’t even said a word about what happened this morning. “If you want me there.”

“I do.” You grin, and his tail flicks back and forth in excitement. More like a canine rather than a feline, but you’re happy that he’s happy.

His limbs twitch, wanting to pull you in a hug.‌‌‌ But he holds himself back, knowing that you’re not exactly comfortable with him yet. He glances around the room, before looking back at you. “So when will we be leaving?”

“In a few days.”

-

The few days passed by rather quickly, Yeosang becoming accustomed to being around you.‌ The incident from the first night didn’t happen again, you bought him a mattress to rest until you move to the new apartment. He’s kept his distance from you, similar behaviors from before when he was upset. But you’ve rarely seen anything but a smile on his lips as he walks around with you, eyes always on yours. The 69 on his neck catches your eye each time he displays his neck, although you’ve noticed that he prefers the long sleeved sweaters that you have. He curls himself up onto the couch most of the day, in and out of sleep. None of that is very much out of the ordinary.

The last few days he’s been strange. Immediately rubbing himself all over your clothing whenever you finished cleaning. Staring at you, and whenever you asked him what’s wrong he’d just sigh and look away. Tail sometimes curling around your leg as you wash dishes, scolding him before he moves away. His hands sometimes brush against your neck, his constant excuse that you had a piece of dust sitting there.

Growling lowly whenever you chatted with San, ignoring you. His chest would puff out as an act of aggression, tail completely still as he watches the screen. Until, you scratched behind his ears and he’d huff happily, quickly getting over his annoyance. You asked him what it was all about but he’d just change the subject. Those are only a few things that’s been bothering you, but you’re just not sure how to properly act around him. Maybe he’s noticed that you’re always on your toes?

The drive to your new apartment is about three hours long, Yeosang preferring to lay in the backseat, gaze on your sunroof. He doesn’t say much on the drive there, his body purring lightly as he feels the soft breeze from the open windows. You glance back at him from the rear view ever so often, your lips unable to hold anything but a smile. You can’t help it; you like him being around.‌

You’re used to staying at home alone, San sometimes coming over and bringing warmth to your home. But with Yeosang here, you look forward to opening the door and seeing him laying on the floor in front of the television set, ears twitch slightly when he hears you walk in. Lazily coming up from a nap to ask you what’s for dinner, and about your day. He hasn’t mentioned how he came to be or why he’s a hybrid, and you never push it. He’ll tell you when you’re ready.

You park in front of your new apartment, reaching back and poking Yeosang’s cheek. His eyes flick open, narrowing once they meet yours.

“Time to get up, sleepy head. We’re here. Remember to grab the hat and hide your tail underneath your clothing, alright?” You say softly, rolling up the windows. You hear a frustrated sigh as he puts on the beanie, curling up his tail into his sweater.

“There has to be more hybrids like me,” he mumbles. “The lab had so many.”

You look at him but he says nothing more about it, stepping out of the car. You lock the doors behind you, Yeosang running ahead, glancing back ever so often to make sure you’re there. You open the door, and he stands outside, glancing around before entering. He runs his hands along the walls of your new apartment, ears twitching at the new sounds. You say nothing, letting him grow accustomed to it as you walk into the bathroom to freshen up.

You come out quickly, hair wet from the quick shower you took. You look around for Yeosang, until you hear a large thump coming from the back of the house. You widen your eyes, jogging down the hallway before swinging the guest room door open.

Yeosang sits in the middle of the room, tail resting lightly behind him. He looks at you, a wide grin on his lips. “You made the room feel like a forest, y/n.” He points to the humidifier in the corner of the room, your biggest purchase and your bank account is definitely crying right now.

You painted the walls a dark green, almost black. You’ve researched that South Chinese Tigers live in damp forests, and you hope your poor man’s attempt at making him feel comfortable is enough. You put several plants around the room, decorating his bed with fake leaves. It’s the best that you can do with your pitiful almost-doctor salary. The bigger humidifier spoke to you, but that’s an investment for another time.

“The rug I bought and the sheets are coming soon. I know you like to lay on the floor a lot, so I bought that just in case you don’t feel like resting in bed.” You say, feeling your cheeks burn. It’s a bit warm in the room, but you’ve noticed that Yeosang hates the cold, always tucked under several layers of blankets.

“… You didn’t need to do this,”‌ he says softly. “I would have been fine with anything. I wouldn’t have complained.”

“I know, and that’s why I did it,”‌ you say simply. Yeosang isn’t one to voice his concerns, keeping to himself often. You realized that he hated well-done meat after a few days, catching him sighing as he looked at the meat placed in front of him. You’re not sure how much the tiger side of him affects his human body, so you cooked the meat for him rare. Right when you placed it in front of him, his ears perked up and he ate it quicker than anything you’ve previously given him.

“I want you to feel comfortable while you’re in our home,” You say, gesturing to the room. “I hope you like it, and if you need anything please just let me know. I’ll try my best to give it to you.”

He stands up from his spot, taking small steps toward you. Only a foot away, you see the flush of his cheeks, eyes focused on yours. Flicks of brown are in the bright yellow, something you haven’t noticed before.

“Can I hug you?” He asks softly. Your heart swells at his care for you, and you nod.

He immediately wraps his arms around you, pressing you against his cheeks. He sighs in content, and you feel his tail curl around your legs, nose sniffing your hair.

“Thank you for not pushing me away. I know this is hard for you to do, taking care of someone while still being in school. I know that, and I’ll try my best to help you in any way that I can.”

“You don’t have to do that, you being here is enough for me, Yeo,” You tease, combing your fingers through his soft locks. He leans into your touch, pressing you harder against him. You let out a small oof, and he laughs, pulling you away.

“Sorry, it just feels good, when you do that.”‌ He says simply. You pull your hand out of his hair, laughing awkwardly as you look away.

“Ha, well… I’ll go make lunch. Come out whenever you’re ready.” You say softly, and he nods, watching as you go.

He curses at himself, closing the door behind you. He’s overstepped, again. But he doesn’t know how to make you see that he’s yours, in every form of the word. Right when he breaks through one of the barriers you’ve put between the two of you, you build it up again. He glances around the room, seeing the small nuisances you’ve made, just for him.

It’s a comfortable warmth in here, but he saw how sweaty you were, wiping your forehead constantly. The dark colors that he would see if he was out in the wild, splashes of color ever so often. He always wondered why you were gone for hours at a time; seeing you covered in paint and tired. His eyes wander around the room, brushing lightly against the plants you’ve placed in there.

Tears coats his eyes as he sees the care you’ve done, all for him. When weeks ago, you told him that you didn’t know what to do with him. But now, you only give him smiles, tell him that you’ve missed him. And making this room, all for him, is only another extension of your care. Your love. Something you won’t admit to yourself.

He sits on the edge of the bed, running his fingers through his light locks. Telling you how he became who he is, it can bring you great danger. And that’s the last thing he’d ever want to do. But, he can’t comprehend you being out of his life. Maybe telling you is the best thing to do. He looks down at his hands, seeing them tremble.‌ He swallows, nodding to himself.

He’ll tell you today.

-

You look at Yeosang as he pushes around the meat on his plate in deep thought, eyebrows furrowed. His tail flicks back and forth anxiously, ears perked straight up. He’s in a T-shirt, a rarity since you’ve bought him mostly sweaters. Is he uncomfortable? You know that it takes a second for animals to adjust, but the way he’s acting, you thought that he liked it.

“Yeo?” You say softly. He doesn't look up from his plate, eyes still furrowed. “Is something wrong? Did you need anything else?”

“No.”

You take the last bite of your food, standing up and walking into the kitchen, washing off your dish slowly. He’s always been open about his feelings, but now, you’ve never seen him so closed off. Maybe he doesn’t like the room? But he seemed so happy about it, it had to be something else…

Oh.

You pushed him away again, running away to the kitchen after playing with his hair. Is he offended?

“y/n?”

You jump at his voice, turning around.‌‌‌ His eyes are usually always on yours, but he’s distant this time, lips in a straight line.

“Can we talk in the living room? I think it’ll be best to explain it there. Don’t worry, this isn’t about you.” He says quickly, playing his dish in the sink. You follow after him, sitting in the chair across from Yeosang. He rubs his fingers together, before touching his neck softly, fingers running across the tattoo burned into his skin.

“When I was born, I was in a lab. I wasn’t a tiger in the beginning, and I wasn’t a human either. The people who took care of me told me that I am only a weapon, nothing more or less.‌ And that I needed to follow their every order, or else. I listened. I was taught how to move between being a tiger and an almost human,” He gestures at his tail. “I lived there with others. There were several different species along with myself, all predators. I don’t know the process, but I know that I wasn’t exactly born. I woke up in a closed room, I can still remember everything from then until now. I remember taking my first steps and turning into the tiger you’re used to seeing.

“But I got tired of listening to them. I am a predator. I couldn’t do it anymore.‌ So I broke out and left. Ran until I couldn’t run anymore. Lived in people’s backyards and abandoned homes, until I realized that becoming a tiger might be better. So I let the circus people take me. I learned that people don’t question animals, although the scars that cover me and the 69 pressed into my skin from the lab raised eyebrows, many assumed I was just a rogue black market tiger. And I was a cute cub at that time, so I wasn’t killed.

“The others, I have seen some. They’re not too far from here, and you probably haven’t noticed. Their appearance is more human when they transform. Jeong Yunho, Kim Hongjoong, those are only a few. Ah,” His eyebrows raise as he thinks. “Choi Jongho, your police officer friend.‌‌ He knew I was in there, in the apartment, but he didn’t say a word. I am forever grateful for that; he always told me that it’s a hazard for all of us to be in the same town, but I thought it was best for us to separate.”

He finally looks up from his hands. “It’s better to not mention the types of animals Yunho, Hongjoong and Jongho are. I want you to know as little as possible, in case someone comes and tries to figure out if you have me with you. I‌ haven’t been a human in a while, so they might not recognize me. At least, until they see the ears and tail.” He touches his ears lightly.

“I kept this from you to protect you.‌‌‌ But over these weeks, I've realized that we’ll be in each other’s lives for a long time. You’ve accepted me with open arms, and I’m forever grateful.” His smile grows as he looks at you. “I’m sorry I’ve kept this from you, but I can’t get into much more detail than that. If you want me to leave, do not hesitate. I will leave right now if you want me to.”

Silence fills the room as he finishes his words. You close your eyes, rubbing your face.‌ Yeosang is an experiment.‌ The government planned, or plans, to use him as a weapon. The lovable, wide eyed and big hearted Yeosang is supposed to be a deadly weapon. You completely understand why he didn’t tell you this immediately. The old you would’ve pushed him out of the door, scared out of your mind. You’re still scared, but you can’t imagine Yeosang being back out there. Even if there’s other hybrids, he’ll be at risk.

And you think it’s best if he stays with you.

“I don’t want you to leave,”‌ you say softly. “I can’t imagine you gone, Yeo. I think you’ve grown on me.” You tease, and he chuckles lightly. “Thank you for telling me this. I can’t even understand what you’ve gone through, but I’m happy you trust me enough to tell me.”

He nods happily. “I trust you, y/n, with everything. I just hope one day you feel the same about me.”

"What do you mean? I do trust you, Yeo. Why do you think I don't?"

He sighs, rubbing his neck slowly. You see him trace the outline of the numbers before he opens his mouth. "You... You trust me yes, but you keep yourself closed off from me. I try to push past those barriers that you have, but it's only so much I can do. I want you to feel comfortable enough with me. But I can wait."

"It's not that I'm not comfortable with you, it's that, I don't know. I don't know if something that I'm doing is bothering you, you know? Like earlier, when I put my hand in your hair—"

"I purred, y/n," he deadpans. "I like it when you touch me."

You look away from his piercing gaze, too overwhelmed with what to say.

"Have you thought about what I've said? About you being my mate?"

Yes. It occupies your mind more than you like, consumes your thoughts constantly. Yeosang keeps on saying that he's your mate so nonchalantly, as if he's telling you the weather. And you're not even sure.... No, you are sure that you feel the same. But your insecurities just continue to pile as you look at him, knowing that he can do so much better than you.

"Please tell me something, y/n. I can help you. I just need you to tell me." He says desperately. You shake your head, looking down.

Holding back how you feel will only gnaw at you until you can't take it anymore. You sigh, eyes fluttering close.

"I am, I, well... Ever since you told me that first night, I can stop thinking about it. Tigers, they have several mates over the years but many do stay with the one that they've chosen. So you telling me that you consider me yours, it's a big fucking deal. I just want to know why."

A knock on the door interrupts the two of you, and you throw Yeosang's hat to him, quickly wiping away your almost tears before rushing to the door. Thankfully, this one has a peephole. San stands on the other side, leaning against the wall as he looks out. You sigh, leaning your head on the door.

Before you open it, Yeosang's hands envelopes yours, stopping you from turning the knob. You look back at him, confused.

"Don't open it," he says softly, almost too low for you to hear. "I didn't tell you the last thing about me." His tail is stiff, pupils thin as he keeps his eyes on the door.

"I can't ignore him, Yeo. And it's San, he won't hurt a fly."

"No, y/n. He's not who you think he is. He pulls your hand away from the door, and you stumble back, confused.

"What the hell—"

"He's one of them," Yeosang shakes glancing at the door. "One of the new predators, y/n. I can smell him from here. He smells like—"

"y/n! Are you going to open the door or am I going to stand out here all day?"

Yeosang looks at you desperately. You glance between him and the door, weighing your options. You've know San for most of your life, growing up with the dork. He's never been weird or suspicious, always helping you when he can. Why would he be one the predators that Yeosang is talking about?

But the pure fear in Yeosang's eyes as he stares at the door, tail straight up and ears perked. His hands dig into the couch fabric behind him, frame rigged. He won't lie about something like this, that you know. He puffs out his chest, low snarls falling from his lips. His eyes are almost a brown as he focuses on the door, fear slowly replaced by anger, waiting for San to break down the door.

If San is who he says he is, he'll understand that you can't see him right now. You grab your phone, shooting him a quick text.

you: hey San! i hear u but i can't really talk right now! got too many boxes to sort through Hhhhh. ill call you when you can come over? drinks on me!

You hear the notification sound from outside the door, listening silently as he types into his phone.

san: u sure? i can help ya out if u want!

you: thanks ;; but im good for now! ill probably message u in the next couple days or so! ❤️

san: fine,,, u owe me gas money for driving over here :/ see you~

You hear his steps fade away, letting out a breath of relief. You look to Yeosang, the anger in his posture not at all gone. You walk over, wrapping your arms around his torso, listening to the rapid beats of his heart. His form slowly molds into yours, before you feels his arms resting on your back. His breaths slow down as he presses his nose into your hair, your smell comforting.

"Thank you for trusting me," he says softly. "I know San is your friend, but I know that something is off about him. He smells like the labs, y/n. He smells like the labs."

You nod your head as you listen to him.

"There are predators that are better than me, faster than me. He's one of the more evolved ones, easier to blend into normal human life. I didn't think I'd need to explain this, but the better hybrids know how to camoflague. Take the lives of existing humans and replacing them easily."

You pull away, looking up at him. "What are you saying?" His eyebrows are tight as he looks at you. His hand brushes against your cheek, before he rests his forehead on yours.

"Your friend, San. He was gone long ago. That is not the same San that you know."

—

Weeks go by and you've ignored San to the point where he doesn't call or text you. Your last conversation ended in anger, you telling him that you needed some space to adjust and him screaming at you about being unreasonable. You believed Yeosang, of course you did, but that conversation proved it to you. San and you, you never fought that hard before. He never called you a bitch so easily, never daring to cross that line.

But the San that you spoke to on the phone did. He called you every name in the book and more, before not contacting you again. You're not sure if he knows about you harboring Yeosang, but he gave no indication of it, thankfully.

Yeosang's been your only friend every since you've moved. You video call Wooyoung every once in a while, listening to his low drawl as he told you about the adjustments the circus made. They bought another animal in, a gorilla. You aren't sure if it's actually legal to own one in a circus, but you don't mention it, you just like speaking to him.

After the incident, Yeosang stuck to your side like glue. Everywhere you went, even to the bathroom, he's always close behind, tail constantly curling into your figure and hands always brushing against your skin. Sometimes, he rubs his head against the clothes you wear, encouraging you to run your fingers through his blond locks. His eyes always watch you as you do so.

You spend time in his room as he reads books softly; the deep timbre of his voice resonating around the room. Your sleeping arrangements are the same, you two in separate rooms. But once during the night you opened the door to him curled against the entrance, on guard as you slept. You scolded him softly before pushing him back to his room, but you suspect that he does it every night, going back to his room just before you wake up each morning.

You've accepted the title of being Yeosang's mate, not that you've told him of course. The threat of fake San barging into your apartment is high, and the potential for others to come is even higher. Yeosang is already stressed enough, and you think adding your feelings into the mix would only make it worse. Because, you love him.

It's strange to think about it. You've only met him as a hybrid a couple of months ago, but you can't even see yourself without his presence. He makes you happier than you've ever been, and his level of caring for you supersedes anything you've ever felt. You wake up and fall asleep, only thinking about him. As long as you see those golden eyes of his every morning.

You sit in the living room, combing your fingers through Yeosang's hair as you both watch a movie. You're lying back on the couch, his body resting over your legs, head on your stomach as you feel his chest rumbling in satisfaction at your touches. Your leg is falling asleep but you don't dare tell Yeo; he's just a big cat after all. He’d just grumble in irritation and whine for the rest of the night.

The scene flicks to the main characters pulling off each other's clothes, and you tense up at that. Yeosang doesn't move at all, watching in silence. The remote is too far away for you to skip, so you settle on watching it, fingers stopping in his hair.

The man begins fucking the woman against the wall, and you widen your eyes. What the hell? Do they not censor anything on TV these days? Yeosang’s hold around your waist tightens slightly, and you feel his head turn. You look down at him, seeing him sniff just beneath your stomach. You widen your eyes as he nuzzles your stomach, untangling himself from around your waist. He pressed his tongue just below your navel, eyes flicking up to yours.

“Yeosang, you can’t–”

“I know you want me, y/n. I can smell you,” He pushes his nose into your crotch, taking long breaths. “I can’t stop, not when you smell so good.”‌ His voice deepens, a dark gleam in his eyes. You’ve never seen them so blown out, pupils completely consuming the gold.

His nostrils flare, moving his face between your legs. You feel his fingers tease the lining of your sweats, keeping his eyes on yours.

“I can’t wait to fuck into you, feeling your pussy tightening around my cock, fucking into you so hard you can’t breathe. Wouldn’t you like that, y/n? Don’t you want me?” You can feel the sheer arousal emitting off of him, the desperate need that threatens to wrap around you. He leans down, eyes focused on yours.

“Tell me you don’t want me. Tell me, and I’ll go away.” You feel the hardness of his cock pressing into your leg, his lips dragging across your cheeks as he waits for you to say something.

You clench your core, eyes fluttering as you feel the room suddenly become hot. “I want you, Yeo. I do.”

The pure evil smirk he gives you is sin incarnated. He pulls down your pants quickly, ripping off your underwear with ease. You lift your legs as he tosses your pants to the side. He tilts his head as he looks down at you, thumbs teasing your sweat up lightly. Despite his feverish behavior, he presses wet kisses up your torso as he slowly pulls your sweater over you.

You’re not wearing a bra, and he sighs in content as he sees your beautiful breasts on display for him. His rough tongue wraps around your nipple, nipping it with his teeth lightly. You moan softly as he moves to the other breast, sucking it softly. He continues to press kisses into your skin, paying special attention to the crook in your neck, licking it slowly.

“Yeo, please,”‌ you groan, feeling him smile into your skin. His lips trail along your jawline before his eyes finally level with yours.

“You’re so beautiful, and all mine.”‌ His words are filled with so much love as he looks at you, nose brushing lightly against yours. “I have to tell you, I don’t know what will happen when I‌ mate with you. Hybrids aren’t exactly animal or human. I wasn’t made for the purpose of reproducing, but I‌ have the instincts anyway.”

He presses his lips lightly to the corner of yours, shuddering softly. “I might be too rough. I don’t want to hurt you, so tell me to stop whenever and I will.”

“You won’t hurt me, Yeo,”‌ You say softly. He smiles, softly pressing his lips against yours. He tugs on your lower lip lightly, and you sigh softly, opening your lips up for him. He slides his tongue between your lips, slowly moving his against yours. His hand slides down your torso, lightly pressing against your lower lips.

Your hips buck into his palm as he dips a finger between your folds. He moves his middle finger slowly over your clit, enough to keep you just on the edge. You try humping against him but he laughs against your lips, other hand holding your hips down. You groan in frustration but he ignores you, moving agonizingly slow.

“Yeo-”

He shoves two fingers into your cunt before you could finish, you gasping against his lips as your hands tangle into his hair. One of your hands brushes against his cat ears and he shudders, biting onto your lip a bit too hard. You feel his teeth pierce the skin and he pulls back, eyes wide.

His fingers stop moving inside of you, the cloud of lust gone as he looks at the strands of spit and blood. “y/n, I’m-”

“It’s okay, keep going.”‌ You say, and he shakes his head. Your fingers rub against his ears again, and he stutters, biting his lip. “I kind of liked it.” You admit softly, and his eyes flick back open, desire rolling in them. He shoves his fingers back into you, moving in and out as he curls against your g-spot. Your breaths pick up as your desperate for release, telling him that you’re going to cum over and over.

He nods slowly, eyes on his hand moving in and out of you. “Come for me, kitten.”

The playful word has you convulsing against his hand, his fingers stuck inside of you as you let out a loud moan, humping softly against his hand. He watches you in awe, eyes bright. You let his hand go, and he immediately takes his fingers, sucking on them. He groans in ecstasy, licking off every last drop of you from his hands before lifting up his shirt quickly.

You clearly see the 69 on his skin now, but you didn’t know what was under his shirt. He always wears big hoodies around you for comfort, never wearing anything tight against his skin. His body is lean muscular, but scars are carved into his skin, tracing from the bottom of his neck to the middle of his stomach. He looks at you nervously, biting his lower lip. But you only lean up, lightly pressing your lips against his skin.

“Look at my tiger,” You say softly. You see the blush rise from the bottom of his neck to his cheeks, before he pulls off his pants. He’s not wearing any underwear, but you’re a bit surprised.

His cock has dark, jagged lines across it, the same pattern that he has as a tiger. He has a bit of fur were his ball hair would be, pink head standing at attention. He leans down, slowly humping against your cunt. You feel his thick length slide between your folds, coating his skin.

“You’re so wet for me, y/n,”‌ he says softly. After a few loose strokes and a whine from you, he presses himself into you slowly. His head is larger than any you’ve seen, and you groan, feeling the stretch of him open you wide.

The growl that emits from his throat is anything but human, cock pushing into you with a low pop. His girth stretches your walls as he slowly bottoms out, small whimpers falling from your lips as you feel all of him enter you. He presses soft kisses against your face, trying his best to alleviate your pain. You feel so full, his sweat dripping onto your body. You run your fingers along his back, slowly going down until you reach his tail. Before he could tell you to stop, you touch it lightly.

He thrusts completely into you, tears springing to your eyes. You feel his cock throb inside you, almost pulsating.

“Are you okay?” He says through clenched teeth, forcing his eyes open. “Shit, you’re so tight.”

“Yes, yes, start moving,”‌ You moan.

He goes slow, long strokes in and out of you as he grunts, trying his best to hold himself back. Your cunt sucks him in with ease, tightening each time he moves out.

“Fuck, y/n, I need to fuck you, alright?” He says, and you immediately know what he means. Before you can say yes, he slams his cock into your cunt. His strokes are quick and deep, your body flung up and down as he pushes into you. Your fingers clutch his hair, and he pulls his arms around you, pressing his chest against yours. Whimpers of pleasure fall from your lips as he slams into you, the wet sounds of your arousal echoing around the living room. He drags his tongue against your neck, sucking and pinching the skin.

“Want to breed you,” He says, hips thrusting into yours. “Fill you up with my cum,” He runs his hand along your belly. “I can see myself fucking you, I can feel you right here.” He presses lightly on your lower stomach, but you can only moan in response.

Yeosang’s pace is unrelenting, the head of his cock presses against your cervix each time he thrusts inside. He rubs your clit quickly, groaning into your neck. “Cum for me, pretty. Cum all over my cock.” He drags his teeth against your ear, biting your lob lightly.

He suddenly picks up his pace, hips pounding into you. The intense feeling of him rubbing your clit and fucking you into the cushions is too much, your moans echoing around the apartment as he pulls himself into you, cumming at the same time. His cock explodes, the white coating your walls. His cock pulsates as he slowly grinds himself into you, sighing into your neck.

After his cock goes limp, he pulls out of you slowly, holding his hand over your cunt, keeping himself inside. A small part of you panics; will you actually have kids with him? You haven’t even gotten your license to practice yet.

“You won’t have offspring,” Yeosang explains softly. “We’re two different species, it’s not possible, so you don’t have to worry about that.”

He brushes his hands through your hair, humming softly. His eyes are filled with love and adoration, pressing his lips to the corner of your brows lightly as he looks at you.

“I love you,” You confess, and he only laughs into your hair.

“I love you too.”

-

San stares at the monitors, glaring at the screen in front of him. He glances down at his cell phone as it rings, and he picks it up, keeping it on loud.

“Have you located SCT-69?” His voice says.

San nods solemnly, watching as Yeosang carries you from the couch, pulling your body close to him as he walks out of the camera’s view. His eyes flick to the next screen, seeing him take care of you.

“Affirmative. They’ve just mated, and he still believes that he won’t impregnate her.”

“Good, then let’s monitor until she is pregnant. We’ll take the thing when it’s born.”

San sighs, “But isn’t it just a kid,‌ Jongho? We shouldn’t…”

“It’s not orders from me, and you know it San. There’s no room for discussion, okay?” Jongho’s says, his voice irritated. “Call me when you need me, I’m hanging up.”

He hears the dial tone, and throws his phone to the side, deep in thought. He feels his friend’s hand rub his back lightly as San looks at the screen. All of this, everything just for an experiment. All that he’s built…

“She’ll be long gone before the specimen rips out of her stomach. It’ll be fine, you don’t need to worry,” Hongjoong murmurs into his ear, pressing his lips lightly against San’s temple.

“You’re right, I know,” he says softly. “This all will be over soon enough.”

_____

tags: @charreddonuts @changbinisms @woniepill @luv-quinn @crowhyun @atinytease @sunukissed @numxra @tohokuu @spooo00oky @kodzukein @cqndiedcherries

Can we please see the full list of who’s on what day for kinktober?

Hello sweet thing. So i won't be revealing the whole list as some days are surprises. But here are the requested days completed. (I will be posting the full list on the 30th of September, though) ♡♡♡

Day 1: Car Sex - Yunho

Day 2: voyeurism/Sunshine Au - Hongjoong

Day 3: Shower Sex - Wooyoung

Day 4: Food Play - Seonghwa

Day 5: Exhibitionism - Wooyoung

Day 6: Rough/Angry sex - San

Day 7: Thigh riding/dry humping - Mingi

Day 8: Sensory Deprivation - Yeosang

Day 9: Cock Warming - Jongho

Day 10: Bondage - Yeosang

Day 11: Bike Sex - Yeosang

Day 12: Size Kink/Size Difference - Yungi

Day 13: Breath Play - San

Day 14: Marking/Biting - Mingi

Day 15: Dumbification/Corruption - Hongjoong

Day 16: Spit Play - Seonghwa

Day 17: Fingering/Squirting - Seonghwa

Day 18: Toys/Mirror sex - Hongjoong

Day 19: Dacryphillia - Mingi

Day 20: Sex pollen - Jongho

Day 21: Temperature Play - Yeosang

Day 22: Double Penetration - 2hos

Day 23: Praise/Body Worship - Jongho

Day 24: Cum eating overstim - Wooyoung

Day 25: Caught in the act - Mingi

Day 26: Sir Kink/Mafia - Matz

Day 27: Succubus/incubus - San

Day 28: Tentacles - Yunho

Day 29: Monster Fuckers - ??

Day 30: Werewolf On Heat/Breeding - ??

Day 31: Trick or Treat - ??

Also, if you want to be tagged to my kinktober tag list or my permanent tag list. Comment/dm/or ask, please ♡♡♡

the angel and the devil masterlist

sansang ff

synopsis

intro

family

angel

new family member

meeting a dragon

new mission: protect the angel

new friend

what’s this feeling?

what is love?

prey and predator

more chapters tba

i wanna write a sansang abo ff🤡🤡

story idea ll:

nsfw ish cos perv san

so like san and reader’s brother (preferably wooyoung) are like bestfriends and they sorta met in university a wooyoung and reader are 4 years apart.

when san enters wooyoung’s house for the first time, he sorta sees reader in his/her school uniform just on his/her phone on the couch and he like thinks shes cute and hot (idk but she’s not underage). but wooyoung says he/she is off limits but lets be honest, san doesnt give a fuck.

so san starts coming more often just to see reader and eventually like one day he accidentally sees his/her laundry and sees his/her undergarment (idk how), and he steals it. slowly he keeps stealing little things from reader.

one day he goes over to reader/wooyoung’s house but doesn’t see wooyoung. he hears water running and goes to check it out thinking its wooyoung, but instead sees reader showering. he sees his/her full body on display with water running down and his pants feel tight.

he takes out his phone to secretly take pics of reader and runs to wooyoung’s room to jerk off.

im a sucker for brother’s best friend and perv san.

𝖕𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖘𝖘’𝖘 𝖊𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖕𝖊

synopsis: ___ was trapped in an arranged marriage with Choi San, the crowned prince of wonderland and her step-sister’s lover. How will she find happiness? How will she escape?

pairing: thief!yunho x fem!reader

themes: royal au, angst, missing family, threats, let me know if I missed anything

wc: 317 words

warning: this is in no way representing anyone’s personality. This is simply a work of fiction. 

a/n: this chapter is not proofread yet, apologies for any grammar or spelling errors😭😭.  ENJOY!!

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 3.5

Over the past 7 years, San and Harin would always meet up behind everyone’s back, thinking no one knew of their secret meetings. Harin would always go to the palace to visit San so as to not raise suspicion from her step-father, and the king and queen were too busy to care about how often Harin would visit. ___, however, was well aware of these secret meetings and the blossoming relationship between the 2. She would just always act oblivious just to trick herself to spare her heart. That was up till 3 years ago, when ____ was forced to move into the palace as she was already 16. This made her even more aware of the things going on in the relationship. The maids would always look at her, sometimes with pity, while other times they would sneer and snicke as they walked past her, gossiping about the relationship between their prince and her step-sister. For the past 3 years, ___ had not gone back home. She hardly ever saw her father, Chaeryeong or Xiaoting. She wasn’t allowed to leave the palace without San. However, over those years, she made a new friend and they grew to be very close. Ezaki Hikaru, her personal maid. Hikaru was much younger than ____. She came from a neighbouring country and her family suffered financially hence she started working in the palace to earn money to support her family. ___ and Hikaru got really close with Jongho as well. Whenever ___  had free time, she would invite Hikaru and Jongho to the library to chat and catch up. Jongho was the only person in touch with ___’s family and always updated her on any news from her family and friends. Like when Chaeryeong had fallen down a flight of stairs while chasing a butterfly but had recovered, or just how much her father, Chaeryeong and Xiaoting were missing her.

masterlist