I May Be A Gryffindor But I'm Giluty Of Doing This Once Or Twice

INKtober! Day 1! Backpack

Heads in the backpack anyone?

it makes me so sad when ppl apologize for talking so much about their hyperfixations. like no keep going i love you

Day 8! Hankiadisese....i can't spell it and don't know a lot about it...but I hope this suffises

@spacebunprince

Larry, The Legend

(Context: we’re playing Curse of Strahd. One of the random encounters is a crazy dude and five twig blights. Our party of five, myself included, quickly get through most of them…but we’re having a lot of trouble with the last blight… After going an entire round with no one hitting this thing:)

Me: Geez, this thing is badass. We should keep it as our mascot.

Cleric: ….. I try to reason with it.

DM: Uh, okay, what do you say?

Cleric: “Hey little guy, calm down. We won’t hurt you. If you stop, we’ll be friends.”

DM: Roll persuasion.

Cleric: [rolls] ….Uh….low….

Me: I give him advantage.

DM: Okay, what do you say?

Me: “We’ll be great friends! We’ll take you out of here and give you lots of sunlight!” (At the time I didn’t know they were vampiric, lol.)

Cleric: [rolls again] 26!

DM: You see the bush pause, seeming to listen…and then it lashes out at you! [rolls] ….Critting!

(Everyone collectively loses their shit. It’s the sorcerer’s turn.)

Paladin: Wait, wait. Can you delay? I want to try something.

DM: There’s no “delay”, but you can hold an action.

Sorcerer: I hold a firebolt if it attacks.

DM: Alright. Paladin’s turn.

Paladin: Okay, I try to reason with it.

DM: What do you say?

Paladin: I come over to it, and start to pet it. “It’s okay little buddy, we’ll be nice, we promise.”

DM: It attacks you. [rolls] ….Critting again!

Sorcerer: I launch my firebolt. [hits, rolls damage]

Everyone: NO!

DM: The shrub goes up in flame and keels over, motionless.

Me: NO, LARRY!

(There’s a few minute cut here in which we loot the corpse and I, a grave cleric, bury the dead man and try to decide what to do with Larry. Eventually…)

Me: I plant Larry and hope his roots are strong.

Cleric: We can come back later to check on him.

Warlock: We can just take him with us.

Me: OMG yes. Anyone have a pot??

Sorcerer: I have a small chest…

Me: I plant him with some dirt in the chest.

DM: Wow, guys. Wow. Okay.

(We proceed to roll nature checks to figure out what this thing is and how to take care of it. The Paladin rolls high enough to get its full creature block. We now know that it’s vampiric.)

Cleric: I was hurt in the battle, so I drip some of my blood on the plant.

Warlock: I’ll do the same.

DM: [in total disbelief] Okay, both of you take one point of damage for feeding the shrub.

(They happily do so. Much later we encounter a woman on the road to Valaki, the lady who sells dream cakes. The DM forgot about her in the village so he put her here so we can have an interaction. We eventually discover her secrets, beat the crap out of her, and she escapes, leaving her cart behind.)

Me: So it has a hatch and stuff? I want to put dirt in the hatch and plant Larry in it.

DM: …You….You do so…

Me: Sweet!

(Now we have a twig blight we torched and are now attempting to nurse back to health. The DM has since gone to a DM group to ask advice about this development and he’s basically been told to give us Larry. XD I might be back in another week with a Larry update…)

I saw this step-by step tutorial of how to Gird Your Loins and it needed to be readjusted. 

how’s everyone doin tonight i just broke tumblr

Please aid me in my ability to hand... please

FUCKING HELL HOW DID I?!

HOW DID I MAKE THESE BEAUTIFUL HANDS?!

@wolfieskies25 @theniceprincess-tnp @ihaileysenpai @plushy16 @phoenixmeeka

some height difference prompts

i’m always scaring you on accident because 1) i walk silently 2) you never see me coming because i’m literally over a foot shorter than you 3) you just really don’t pay any attention to anything below chin level do you 

you always put things on the top shelves because that’s pretty much eye level to you and so you think it makes sense but exCUSE ME, IF YOU HAVEN’T NOTICED YET I’M ACTUALLY THE SIZE OF A SEVENTH GRADE CHILD AND WHY ARE YOU PUTTING EVERYTHING ON THE TOP SHELVES THAT’S BASICALLY A DIFFERENT ATMOSPHERIC LAYER TO ME YOU SENTIENT TREE

“how tall are you even??” “like six seven i think, idk” “what the fuck” 

i have to stand on a chair to be intimidating when i yell at you and you always start laughing at how ridiculous i look and damn it your cuTE LAUGH ISN’T GOING TO MAKE ME LESS ANGRY STOP HUGGING ME PUT ME DOWN I’M STILL MAD AT YOU

everyone seems to expect me to be some evil angry midget because i’m so short but i’m actually really chill, it’s my tall friend over there who’s pretty much satan 

stop being a snarky salt lord or i will elbow you in the crotch with no regrets. that’s what you get for being tall and an asshole. 

this is really awkward because i swear i know what your face looks like but i always recognize you by the top of your head and today you wore a hoodie/hat/coat so i was looking for you for about half an hour before you took off the hood/hat and i realized who you were

For you and your internet friends! 💙

Feel free to send these to them but please do not repost