I Hate To Do This, But I Need To Ask For Help

# it’s Joshua

Same energy

drake and his extremely exhausted gay friend hawkins

I am forever yelling about fukuara

More sketches with pastels bcs i have a new sketchbook

no one of my sketches is clean i just physically can't do something clean

I love the concept of Shigeo/???% because, to me, he embodies the inevitability of self love. It is not always quick, it is not always easy, but it always comes in the end. You can let yourself be beaten down, broken, and not even try to save yourself or get up. You can convince yourself that you deserve it, that it must happen, and that you welcome its arrival. But there is an eternal, unkillable seed of stubbornness residing in the body that will try its fucking hardest to heal your wounds, to seek out pleasure, and keep you alive at all costs. There is something hallowed living in the body that will outlast the death of every goddamn star in the sky just to keep you safe. Because it loves you. Because it IS you. Because you are an irrepressible miracle of life and you cannot be separated from the impossible hope of it.

Mob has violently suppressed this part of himself for so long and let it build up and up and up through all of these near-death experiences and pain and torture. He let it get restless, afraid, and desperate, like a trapped animal; teeth bared, vicious, and alone. Shigeo loves Mob and IS Mob and Shigeo is tired of the suffering and the pain and ignoring every survival instinct he has. Ignoring the instinctual urge for justice and retaliation. Resisting his own need for happiness and relief.

When Mob is badly hurt—practically killed—and a breaking point is reached, with Shigeo crawling out of the prison of Mob’s heart and finally finally finally finding a release to the tension and the anxious, angry, devastated energy, he is hurting people. He is destroying property. He is Lashing Out at potential threats and old pains. He is protecting Mob at all costs, stuck in survival mode. Even then, with blood and destruction at his feet, worst nightmare realized, Mob still loves himself. At least a little bit. Because it is inevitable. It is built into the body. It is a requirement of being alive. It is cradling his face in its hands, bringing him closer and closer to the delicate hope of love.

He is staying alive, no matter what destruction awaits, because Shigeo loves himself and wants a second chance at authenticity and happiness, starting with Tsubomi. Against all odds, he desperately, incredibly, impossibly, amazingly still loves himself. And it brings him to his feet in the face of death itself.

Introducing the Be More Chill Archive!

The Be More Chill Archive is a free online resource for artists, cosplayers, etc. to find references of costumes, props, set, and more from the musical Be More Chill. The archive contains references from all 5 official productions of the show. Feel free to comb through it or add references yourself!

You can find it here!

Inspector Yuuya on the scene!

A sort of clothes swap with Inspector Cabanela from Ghost Trick!

hi, do you still have footage of will roland performing in the seth concert series from 2022? i would really love the clip of teenage dirtbag posted if you do since my little sister really loves his version of that from 2014 and it would make her day. it's okay if you don't tho, or dont want to share, I wont take it personally! thanks for what you already shared too, it's really cool

It is no problem at all, here is the recording :)

various doodles from last night