“I Don’t Want To Die, I Just Don’t Want To Exist Any More” Sounds Mild If You’ve Never Experienced

New Challenge!! Is the man on my dashboard

a) Jesus Christ

b) Odysseus

c) Jayce Talis

d) Jonathan Sims

I just remembered I have the ability to art and then discovered 'holy shit two cakes' so please enjoy this sketch

Polyancients headcanons because I can

Body type wise both dark cacao and hollyberry are the biggest. Both of them are insanely muscular, the difference is hollyberry has wide hips and thighs that could kill and dark cacao has broad shoulders and man titties with a snatched waist

Golden cheese is all lean muscle. Great abs, muscular thighs, but she's not big. She's the second smallest just over pure vanilla and lords it over him every chance she gets (she's like 2 inches taller)

Pure vanilla is a short king, like 5'2" but cookie equivalent, he kinda has a sleeper build, but it doesn't matter because the others can just pick him up whenever they please

White Lilly cookie is the tallest of all of them, and also the skinniest. She's all beanpole, and while her posture already wasn't great, it gets even worse after she's woken up

Now I don't know enough about the lore to take a hard stance but I don't actually think that they all got together before the flour wars or after them either. I think that they all wanted to, but assumed no one else was interested so never confessed. Afterwards they're all busy with their kingdoms and lives and it isn't until after they finally pass on their kingdoms and soul jams that they can get together and just live on a farm somewhere

(On another note i know it's not really confirmed how or when cookies get old or how immortality works, so I'm just gonna assume it's power scaled and since all of them were strong before they had the soul jams I'm just going to assume they have plenty of years to live out their lives)

Also on the note of soul jams, who do I think they would be passed to? Well I saw a parallel between the main story characters and the ancients that I reblogged, but! there's a more interesting answer I believe

For the soul jam of truth I think pv would either give it to custard cookie the iii or to raisin cookie (this is under the assumption that raisin cookie wouldn't join the polycule which is a whole other story)

For passion, I think the obvious answer is princess cookie, she's a direct descendant and basically proved her worth in the princess contest, but other than that I think choco werehound brute would be the funny answer

For resilience I am literally begging and pleading for dark cacao cookie to apologize to his son and give him the soul jam. I would give anything for it I would write it I would draw it if I could I just need it so so desperately

For abundance it would probably go to one of the other cheese cookies, buttttt from the very little I know of capsaicin cookie (literally nothing I saw the thumbnail of one YouTube video) I think he should get it

Lastly freedom, I think white Lilly would either give it to silverbell, or I think that cream puff cookie should get it purely based on vibes

Also all the ancients are different brands of autistic except golden cheese, she has adhd

Pure vanilla and white Lilly cookie both have the, "wait they were flirting with/bullying/wanted to be friends with me?" Mostly, and pv does the blunt truth thing that neurotypicals hate and white Lilly goes into research mode and doesn't eat or drink for a day or two unless someone makes her

Dark cacao is kinda obvious, there's only so much one man can talk about his literal sword and it feels like every time he has a moment in the story it has to be mentioned once, he's always bringing up his special interest (just like me fr)

Hollyberry is audhd, but sadly cannot claim the uncanny adhd reading people. It's very rare that she dedicates herself to one special interest and instead cycles through a few (she's also just like me fr)

I don't have more depth on golden cheese because I'm still learning about her character, but she just has the vibes

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fake idgafer, I saw you use maladaptive daydreaming to feel a sense of control and comfort

Encouragment for writers that I know seems discouraging at first but I promise it’s motivational-

• Those emotional scenes you’ve planned will never be as good on page as they are in your head. To YOU. Your audience, however, is eating it up. Just because you can’t articulate the emotion of a scene to your satisfaction doesn’t mean it’s not impacting the reader. 

• Sometimes a sentence, a paragraph, or even a whole scene will not be salvagable. Either it wasn’t necessary to the story to begin with, or you can put it to the side and re-write it later, but for now it’s gotta go. It doesn’t make you a bad writer to have to trim, it makes you a good writer to know to trim.

• There are several stories just like yours. And that’s okay, there’s no story in existence of completely original concepts. What makes your story “original” is that it’s yours. No one else can write your story the way you can.

• You have writing weaknesses. Everyone does. But don’t accept your writing weaknesses as unchanging facts about yourself. Don’t be content with being crap at description, dialogue, world building, etc. Writers that are comfortable being crap at things won’t improve, and that’s not you. It’s going to burn, but work that muscle. I promise you’ll like the outcome.

my favorite pass time is coming up with a really stupid idea and committing so hard to it.

love the thing where typically masculine characters get mistaken for being butch, very funny to me

more of my incoherent ramblings under the cut

poly ancients is fucking hilarious to me okay, I can't stop thinking about these old people

Here, have more perchance incorrect quotes

Dark Cacao Cookie: What are you two arguing about this time?

White Lily Cookie: She's always using common phrases incorrectly!

Golden Cheese Cookie: Cry me a table, White Lily Cookie.

Hollyberry Cookie: Pure Vanilla Cookie is off at an appointment, so while he's gone, I’m going to cut the sleeves off all of my shirts.

Golden Cheese Cookie: Why?

Hollyberry Cookie: They’re like 90% of my impulse control.

Golden Cheese Cookie: There are three ways to handle a difficult situation. The right way, the wrong way, and the Hollyberry Cookie way.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Isn't that the wrong way? Golden Cheese Cookie: Yes, but it's faster.

Golden Cheese Cookie: I apologize for saying 'fuck' in front of Pure Vanilla Cookie.

Hollyberry Cookie: You just said it again.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: ...

Golden Cheese Cookie: I am not a role model.

White Lily Cookie: I’m not mad, I just need to know why you two had a fake ID.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: *Incoherent mumbling*

White Lily Cookie: Huh?

Hollyberry Cookie: …You need to be 18 to hold the puppies at PetCo.

Pure Vanilla Cookie: Wow, great work on the Halloween decorations. Where did you get the fake skeletons?

Dark Cacao Cookie: Fake?

Golden Cheese Cookie: I have an idea.

Hollyberry Cookie: A good idea?

Golden Cheese Cookie: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

*Golden Cheese Cookie is fighting a monster*

White Lily Cookie: Just stay calm! You already have everything you need to beat it!

Golden Cheese Cookie: The power to believe in myself!?

White Lily Cookie: No, a spear! Stab it!

I hate it when people ask me what genre of music i listen to because i genuinely have no clue. It's called Music I Like genre. The best genre out there

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