I Have Been Waiting All Year To Post This.

Listen. Listen I get the hype and thirst for Miguel O'Hara okay? I get it. BUT THE WAY I WOULD FOLD FOR HOBIE BROWN I SWEAR TO GOD. I would make lawn chairs jealous. Wet paper towels would have nothing on me. Origami would wish it could do what I would do. The unholy things I want that man to do to me would get me banned from church. I apologize in advance for the person I will become once ATSV gets released on demand. Hobie and Miguel had no reason to be that fine but if I don't see more people simping for Spiderpunk I will be DISAPPOINTED he was TOO GODDAMN PRETTY for you guys not to jump on that.

reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

Built Like An Ice Cream Cone

It was actually sweltering outside, genuinely so hot you felt like you were back on Alternia during the dawn and your ass was about to be fried extra crispy. Your poor ac unit was giving its all but even that wasn’t enough to cool you down. It was barely enough to push around the stagnant air in your living room. You’d traded in your normal attire for shorts and a thin tank top that was near see through from your sweat. As far as you were concerned you were practically dying. Which was saying something as your time on Alternia had made it nigh impossible to truly feel like you were about to melt into a human skin puddle. Marvus, the bastard, seemed completely fine walking around in his day off clothes like it was a gentle summer night and not the scorching hell of being far too close to the sun. It made begrudging sense considering he naturally ran somewhere around freezing cold. An absolute nightmare in the winter when he tried to snuggle close because humans ran so hot. You were not his living hot water bottle and you’d be damned before he made you freeze to death. Even so you still always made sure to keep an electric blanket or three on hand during the winter months. 

Now though, well, it was time for revenge. You were dying of heat stroke and were now going to use Marvus’ natural coldness to your advantage. If you got to inadvertently snuggle with your matesprit, well- that was just a bonus. 

“Hey babe,” You called out teasingly the plan already forming, “So I was thinking...”

“Yeah? Whatcha thinkin bout?” He was already shuffling closer a bottle of faygo in hand. Absolutely clueless about what you were planning. Perfect. 

“You’re built exactly like an ice cream cone.”

“Wh-,”

“Like, babe, your body is a t-pose.”

“Oh-,”

“Your pecs are bigger than the pillows on the couch.” As predicted he tossed the faygo aside in order to grab you and toss you over a shoulder. His skin was exactly as cool as you had predicted. Sweet relief flooded through you as he soaked up some of the heat still clinging to your everything. His usual day off clothes consisted mostly of a pair of baggy sweatpants and sometimes a black tank top that was stretched so tightly over him it left little to the imagination. Most times he walked around your house without a shirt because none of the people who liked to photograph him knew where you lived. Today, however, was one of the rare times he wore his sweats with an honest to god t-shirt. Still in that iconic black that trolls seemed to love so much, it highlighted the fact he was indeed built like the entire letter ‘T’. 

“Babe, you’re a Dorito.” You laughed and he tossed you unceremoniously onto the couch. 

“Why you gotta roast me like dis babe? E’ery chance you be gettin’ you shoot harder than tha profs.”

“I’m not taking shit from someone whose body type is ‘upside down pear’.” You shot back with a grin. Marvus’ shoulders shook with suppressed laughter as he crawled onto the couch after you- careful not to accidentally squish you underneath him. Taking a moment to be a little soft with him you let your hands glide firmly over his chest and across his shoulders until you were gently cupping his biceps. Truthfully you enjoyed how Marvus looked, a little added bonus to the reasons you liked him so damn much. Plus you were going to use those bara tiddies of his as a cool pillow the minute you were able to get him under you. It was a game the two of you played. 

“Fuckin’ reverse triangle lookin’ motherfucker.” You teased already shifting enough for him to slide down next to you. It wasn’t an easy feat, this couch barely held two humans laying down much less an entire extra heaping of clown. He was laughing now, small genuine chuckles that were more puffs of air than actual sound. Moving until you were laying sprawled across his chest and stomach. Resting your chin in his cleavage you smiled down at him. 

“Ya horrible babe.”

“Good luck returning me without a receipt.” You snorted causing his entire body to shake with a laugh. 

“Shit we been knew. I ain’t sendin’ yo mean lil ass to tha los’ n foun’.” He grinned- sharp teeth easily on display. Once upon a time you might have been a little unsettled by those fangs so close to your face but now all you felt was a sort of contentment. Making him smile something other than his usual ‘show biz’ grin always filled you with a sense of pride. “Besides,” His grin turned to a more sly smile, “We all knows that yo ass be gettin’ real fuckin’ friendly with these.” His hand came up to push you further into his cleavage and your snort turned full blown cackling was muffled as you smacked at whatever you could reach. God, what a nerd. You loved him to pieces. 

ABOUT THE BLOG

Hiya! This is a purely stress relief blog thing for me. I post about fantasy/sci-fi/worldbuilding and a few other things. Some of my writing is reader insert and plenty of head canons. You guys can even request things I certainly don’t mind. 

Enjoy~!

homestuck is old enough to start playing sburb today...... incredible

On break at work and I saw the most delicious image on my goddamn pinterest of a man in garter stockings and black panties and listen- listen- I will in fact be picturing my favorite men in that exact outfit. Like the Thoughts this gives me. Why am I at work? Why am I at work and unable to write about men in stockings and panties like. Genuinely what. This is bi/pan/homophobia. I want to write my little porn blurbs about some subs getting absolutely demolished. Where are my fics of pretty and masculine men crying and begging to get off while someone lovingly takes them apart piece by piece? I'm gonna babygirlify some grown ass men I swear to god.

I may be at work right now but istg if I have time tonight I'm gonna be posting so much more stuff.

A little tasting menu of what I have done and waiting to be posted after this damn work shift:

Lights Part 5

Voidrot!Female Reader x Sollux

Fnaf drabble request that had me cackling and wishing I had a decent drawing tablet.

The horniest sacrilegious altar/confessional booth porn I've never been more delighted to see in my inbox.

And some other stuff that I'm going to try and work on today after work if I get the time!

Anyone else look at their favorite characters and just desperately hope they get like an actual friend. Like maybe they have friends in canon but they clearly aren't actually all that close with them so they're still alone. And you just sit there wanting to scream because you could be that friend. Like sure having a close friend won't fix all their issues but jesus they need a shoulder to fucking cry on and someone who will just hold them for a long while without expecting something in return for it. Like. Am I just incredibly queer or is this a universal thing? Because I don't know if anyone else just wants to wrap their fav in a blanket and hand them tissues and comfort food while they wail their heart out and vent. But I sure fucking do.

Home pt. 2

(Part 2 of the Home series.)

Dead on your feet did not describe you at that moment. You were well past that mark, swaying ever so slightly as you stood, at this time of night the store was almost dead. Only a few other people were milling about, most of which were nocturnal. At the moment you stood in the hardware aisle. You needed more bathroom tiles. Luckily it was only a small spot but you wanted it done before any water damage could set in. But the tiles you needed were out of reach on the top shelf. You had told your parents you were stopping at the store for a new shaving razor- and you were- but your main reason was the tile. It would take away from your fridge budget but even so all you needed was one more check. The thought of having such a big part of your renovations done had put you in such a chipper mood you hadn’t even complained about the double shift one of your bosses had forced on you. Though now you were beginning to see a problem. It was going to be dangerous climbing up the shelves in this state but you needed those tiles. 

“(Y/N)!” A voice called out causing you to jump from surprise. Azar stood at the other end of the aisle with a basket hanging neatly from one arm. He looked just as surprised to see you as you were to see him. 

“Azar? Hey.” You smiled tiredly. The surprise melted to concern the closer he came to you. It might have been the bags under your eyes. 

“Are you alright?” He asked, his antennae flicked about in concern. For a moment you found it incredibly endearing- and distracting. 

“Yeah just a double shift y’know?” Your laugh sounded only slightly defeated. Azar frowned and grabbed the tiles you had been staring at. 

“Is this all you needed?”

“Yes, thank you.” 

“You can thank me by letting me take you home. There is no way you can drive in your state.”

“I walked-,”

“Even more concerning. Just let me do this alright? I’ll sleep better knowing you didn't pass out on the sidewalk or got jumped on the way home.”

You bit your lip. On one hand you didn’t want to walk home. He had valid points on that front. But on the other you knew your parents would throw an absolute fit if they saw him. 

“Listen Azar, I’d love that but-,”

“No buts. I am going to take you home.”

“Yeah, okay, but-,”

“(Y/N). If the thought of me knowing where you live makes you uncomfortable I’m alright dropping you at the end of your street. I just don’t want you to walk all the way home when you are clearly exhausted.”

“It’s not that Azar,” You sighed, shoulder’s slumping, “It’s my parents. They’re very... Traditional.”

You could see the moment he realized what you meant. At first his face went carefully blank and then his whole body went taut with what you assumed was anger. 

“So you have to sneak around behind their backs? That is no way to live!”

“I know but I’m working on it. They already kicked out my sister, she was lucky she had a fiancée she was already semi-living with.”

“Do you have a place to go if they do kick you out?”

“Sort of?” You dragged out sheepishly. Azar sighed. 

“I won’t pry. Just know that if push comes to shove you can stay at my place for as long as it takes to get back on your feet.” 

You stared at him stunned. Was he really willing to do that for you? It nearly made you cry with relief at having a plan b that didn’t involve crashing with your sister and her wife. Instead you simply nodded and allowed him to lead you towards the check out. The cashier raised a brow at the two of you but didn’t ask questions, just rang you both up and sent you on your merry way. 

Azar dropped you off two houses down from your own, waiting until you had given a wave from your doorstep before he drove off. Fortunately it seemed your parents were fast asleep and you happily snuck up to your room. Closing the door softly you pulled out the tile and stuffed it into the bottom of your hiking bag. The less questions the better. Next week was pay week and the thought followed you to bed. Next week was the break you needed. Soon you’d have a fridge to stock and the only major purchase you’d have to make after that was the bed. Everything else could simply be moved. Your parents couldn’t have you arrested for theft if you only took what you had bought in the first place. Yes, once you had the fridge and the bed you’d be home free. 

(Part 3 is up!)