my dad just told me that hopefully if I use the bike downstairs, he’ll hopefully see some ‘progress on me.’ Great mean$p0.
My birthday is this Sunday and I’m not skinny.
holy shit I think I actually hate eating at this point, it tastes alright but then just feels disgusting. I wish I lived on my own so I could just starve and starve.
I know maintaining is better than gaining, but I just feel so stuck. May the honeymoon phase find me again. ❤️🩹😔
IT’S MY ABUELOS BIRTHDAY HE’S TURNING 69 I LOVE HIM SMMM! HE IS THE SWEETEST PEA EVER. He sang to me, and we took lots of photos. We both watch Charmed together, his English isn’t amazing so he calls it ‘witches’ though I think he watches just cause he has a crush on Phoebe lmao. He loves my plushies and treats them like his grandkids. He gives me flowers on Mother’s Day bc I’m ‘their mother’. He’s an identical twin, and they’re both so handsome! Happy birthday to him and my Tio. I hope he gets to see a skinny version of me next year. ❤️❤️
(sorry for the pfp it’s temporary but I still figuring it out so you’ll have to bare with me and my choppedness, luv ya’ll.)
I’m so done. I’m going back to school in a few hours, I just pulled out a chunk of my hair, I ruined my fast, and if I tell my parent they’ll send me back to the ward, and I have a therapist appt later today.
I hate purging but still feeling some food in me. 😔
I hate my mind sometimes, why did I just have a dream I broke my fast, and I woke up all panicked, and guilty like I actually did.