I NEED YOUR HELP!!

I NEED YOUR HELP!!

Greetings my cubs! X3 Ester is coming up and I need YOUR help to decide, what to draw as for the ester special!!đŸ˜ŁđŸ˜„ I already have some ideas but I can’t decide between them, and that’s where you can help me!!😄😁 Comment on this post with one of the symbols below or do the pole I post on twitter ^^ now for the Ideas:

💜 Brohm/Brycewrecker 🐯 MiniCAT 🐇 bbs/bbc bottoms as bunny boys

Thank you for helping me in this!! ~ bey 😄

More Posts from Magickizu and Others

10 months ago

"Your Violence is just a silent cry for love "

"Your Violence Is Just A Silent Cry For Love "

Yo hello

Here's a little character analysis of Billy Hargrove and a song analysis of a German song from the 80s-90s because I've only been listening to the 80s for days thanks to my Stranger Things hyper fixation and I think the song fits Billy Hargrove really damn well. Oh also I am from germany too lol

The song is called "Schrei nach liebe" by the German punk rock band "die Ärzte". The band is one of the most famous German bands and I'm honest Billy would definitely have listened to them. Also they was very popular in the 80s and the 90s.

The song is about a fascist and is actually just a criticism of fascism and right-wing extremism. At least that's the core message of the song. However, if you analyse and interpret the lyrics more (one of my favourite hobbies lol) the song is about a person acting aggressively, behaving like an asshole because the person has never experienced love in their life and this aggression is actually just a "silent cry for love."

I even took the trouble to translate the lyrics for you. (In general, the music of the Ärzte is really great. I just don't know if it's for someone who doesn't speak German xD)

__________________

https://youtu.be/arYpKveHrq8?si=fVOrAMqiHrTdO4PC

(For everyone who want to hear the song. Very good rock song btw :D)

"Lyrics" /translation (explanation)

[Verse 1]

"Du bist wirklich saudumm" /you're really damn stupid

"Darum gehts dir gut" /That's why you feel fine

"Hass ist deine AttitĂŒde" /Hatred is your attitude

"StÀndig kocht dein Blut" /Your blood boils constantly

"Alles muss man dir erklĂ€ren, weil du wirklich gar nichts weiß / Everything has to be explained to you, because you really don't know anything

"Höchstwahrscheinlich nicht einmal, was AttitĂŒde heißt"/ Most likely not even, what attitude means

[Chorus]

"Deine Gewalt ist nur ein stummer Schrei nach Liebe" /Your violence is just a silent cry for love

"Deine Springerstiefel sehnen sich nach zÀrtlichkeit" /Your combat boots yearn for endearment (combat boots were clothings for a typical neo n@zi in the 80s.)

"Du hast nie gelernt dich zu artikulieren " /You never learned to articulate yourself

"Und deine Eltern hatten niemals fĂŒr dich Zeit."/ And your parents never had time for you

"Oh oh oh Arschloch!" /Oh oh oh Asshole!

[Verse 2]

"Warum hast du Angst vorm streicheln?" /Why are you afraid of fondling?

"Was soll all der Terz ?" / What's all that fuss about?

"Unterm Lorbeerkranz mit Eicheln" /Under the laurel wreath with acorns

"Weiß ich schlĂ€gt ein Herz" /I know your heart beats

"Und Romantik ist fĂŒr dich" /And romance is for you

"Nicht bloß graue Theorie" /More than mere theory

"Zwischen Störkraft und den Onkelz" /Between Störkraft and the Onkelz (also two famous Rock Bands from the 80s known as right wing extremism bands. )

"Steht ne Kuschelrock LP"/ There's a Kuschelrock LP (Kuschelrock/ cuddle rock. Soft rock basically)

[Chorus]

"Deine Gewalt ist nur ein stummer Schrei nach Liebe" /Your violence is just a silent cry for love

"Deine Springerstiefel sehnen sich nach zÀrtlichkeit" /Your combat boots yearn for endearment

Du hast nie gelernt dich zu artikulieren " /You never learned to articulate yourself

"Und deine Eltern hatten niemals fĂŒr dich Zeit."/ And your parents never had time for you

"Oh oh oh Arschloch!" /Oh oh oh Asshole!

[Verse 3]

"Weil du Probleme hast die keinen Interessieren" /Because you have problems that nobody cares about

"Weil du schiss vorm Schmusen hast, bist du ein faschist" /Because you're shit-scared of cuddling, you're a fascist

"Du musst deinen Selbsthass nicht auf andere projizieren /You don't have to project your self-hatred onto others

"Damit keiner merkt was fĂŒr ein lieber Kerl du bist" /So that no one notices what a kind guy you are

[Chorus]

"Deine Gewalt ist nur ein stummer Schrei nach Liebe" /Your violence is just a silent cry for love

"Deine Springerstiefel sehnen sich nach zÀrtlichkeit" /Your combat boots yearn for endearment

Du hast nie gelernt dich artizukulieren " /You never learned to articulate yourself

"Und deine Freundin die hat niemals fĂŒr dich Zeit." /And your girlfriend never has time for you

Oh oh oh Arschloch Arschloch Arschloch /oh oh oh Asshole Asshole Asshole

_________________________________

Billy is portrayed in the series as the cliché asshole from the 80s. He's sexist, racist and has no respect. He was shitty to Max yada yada yada... but in truth Billy is just a character who hasn't experienced love. The only love he got was from his mum who left him when he was a kid. Now he lives with his abusive father and gets to listen to how shit Billy is day in and day out. Not a great feeling. He's built walls around himself to protect himself from it all. He's a tough guy and plays the asshole so that he can't be hurt any further. Dacre Montgomery (Billy's actor) said himself that Billy is a sensitive guy. Especially in season 3, we got to see a very different side of Billy. A vulnerable side. He hurts to stop being hurt, but really he just wants to be loved

"your violence is just a silent cry for love"

The 3rd verse in particular suits Billy very well.

"Because you have problems that nobody cares about"

It's true. Nobody in this series really cares how Billy is doing. His stepmother Susan just watches while his own father beats him. On the one hand understandable because Billy is not her biological son but on the other hand really not nice of her. And Max... ohhh Maxine Maxine.

Max and Billy's relationship is complicated. Neither of them obviously want the situation they are in at the moment. Billy never wanted a sister. Max never wanted a big brother. Yet they both care about each other. The worry when Max ran away in episode 8 season 2 was real. Especially when Billy saw that Max was alone with 3 boys and a much older one. Billy had a point during the whole confrontation with Steve. Everyone was supposed to be on Billy's side because he was right. This also brings up the theme of the song again. Billy acted with violence because that's the only way he knows. Because that's the way he was treated by his father and those around him. He could have tried to talk, but he didn't, because violence is the only language he knows.

"You don't have to project your self-hatred onto others so that no one realises what a kind guy you are."

Billy hates himself. That is obvious. He's not good enough for his father's love. He never will be. He will never be able to show enough respect and responsibility because everything he does is not good enough. People who are not happy with themselves very often project this self-hatred onto others and take out their anger and frustration on others.

I would also like to come back to the fight between him and Steve. The anger Billy showed was not directed at Steve. Before Billy turned up at the Byers', his father was shouting at him and hitting him. You saw the fear in Billy's eyes. He was crying afterwards. And then the fact that he had to cancel his date, which he was really looking forward to. And all because his sister didn't listen. She just did what she wanted without considering the consequences. That is disrespectful to her brother and she shows no responsibility.

What did Neil say to Billy in the scene? What should he have ? That's right. Respect and responsibility. He should always be respectful and responsible. And Max? She can do whatever she wants because she doesn't get punished. That's unfair. Another factor why he was angry in that scene. What happened with Steve just make the camel overflow and Steve got this pent-up anger. Of course what Billy did is not cool and what I've written here is no excuse... but Billy is always shown in the show as the bad guy and the asshole. A real monster even. Which is just complete bullshit. Billy is just a teenager who was mistreated by his father for years, never experienced love and therefore doesn't know what it is. This hatred and this anger are a cry for help. A silent cry for love.

And what I wanted to say again about the whole "Billy is a racist" thing. Yes, the Duffer brothers have confirmed that he is a racist, but they have also said that Billy is pure evil. If Dacre hadn't insisted that scene with Neil exist, then Billy would just be an asshole for no reason. In my opinion, Billy is not racist. Neil does. Billy got the idea from his father that non-white people are bad. If Neil had seen Max hanging out with a black boy, he would have freaked out. In the worst case scenario, she would also have become a victim of Neil's violence. Billy wanted to prevent that. She shouldn't suffer from Neil like he did. So he told Lucas to stay away from her. So neutralize the danger. Of course Lucas isn't a danger because he's a damn child, but he would have been dangerous if Neil had found out. Why didn't Billy just talk to Lucas? That was due to the situation. The pent up anger and all that...I've already explained it above.

I just think it's a shame that many people don't look behind Billy's hard facade. He is a complex character with far too little screen time. He did have his "redemption arc" by sacrificing himself for the children but... let's be honest, no one was really grateful to him for it. Nobody except Max and El gave a damn about him. Billy was just a teenager who was in the wrong place at the wrong time in Season 3. The Duffer brothers wanted the audience to dislike him. They should degrade him to an asshole by hook or by crook. No villain should be evil simply because they are evil.

Billy is just a misunderstood teenager who deserves better than what the Duffer brothers did to him. I would have really liked to see him in season 4.

RIP Billy ❀

Thank you for your attention

9 months ago

Okay but like, sorry for the lack of resolution and all the blurry pixels but like
.why the title card on Netflix gotta put Steve’s absolute cake on display like that

Okay But Like, Sorry For The Lack Of Resolution And All The Blurry Pixels But Like
.why The Title Card
Okay But Like, Sorry For The Lack Of Resolution And All The Blurry Pixels But Like
.why The Title Card
Okay But Like, Sorry For The Lack Of Resolution And All The Blurry Pixels But Like
.why The Title Card

my word

7 years ago

Please reblog if you’re one of those people that your friends can always go to if they need to vent, but you don’t like venting to them because you feel like you’re taking up their time, you’re annoying, you don’t want them to worry, and/or you just prefer to be the one to always help others instead of the one who needs help

I just want to know I’m not the only one

9 months ago

Even MORE of Casual

Steve’s phone rang just as he was pulling the meatballs out of the oven. He slid the pan onto the range top quickly, tossing the towel he used as an oven mitt over his shoulder as he grabbed the phone off the wall. 

“Yello,” he greeted the caller.

“...Steve?” The voice was young, feminine, familiar.

“Max? Hey. How are you?”

In response, the young woman sobbed.

Oh shit.

“Oh shit. Max? Are you okay?” Steve was frozen. He and Max were not exactly close and Billy was still keeping very mum on their
non-relationship. Despite this Steve’s first thought was that there must be something wrong with Billy.

“Billy told me to call you.”

OH SHIT. Steve’s blood ran cold. If Billy told his little sister to call him, things were bad.

“What’s going on, Max? Is Billy okay? Did something happen in California?” Billy had left to visit his mom’s family earlier that week.

“Oh. Yeah, he’s fine. He told me to call you if I, um, if I needed anything while Billy was gone?” The statement sounded like a question. Steve was stunned, then felt heat flood his system - Billy had told Max to call him. Before he let himself get lost in the knowledge that Billy trusted him with his family, Steve refocused on Max.

“What do you need, Max? I’m here.”

She sniffed, hard.

“Um, my mom and Neil are having a huge argument, and usually when this happens I call Billy and he’ll come pick me up and we’ll go to his apartment, but he’s gone, and mom is REALLY upset, she’s, like, trying to kick Neil out of the house? And-,” she hiccuped. “- I know I’m, like, a little old for this, but I hate it when they fight, it reminds me of when Billy lived here and Neil would, would-. Steve, I don’t know what to do.”

“I’m gonna come get you, okay? Can you get out of the house and wait for me somewhere? There’s a park nearby, go to the swings and wait there and I’ll be there in 15 minutes. Okay, Max?”

Her voice was small but relieved when she whispered “Okay,” back.

“I’m leaving right now, Max. I’ll see you soon.” He waited for her to hang up, then grabbed his keys and wallet, barely remembering to turn off the oven, leaving the meatballs on the stovetop, and running out of his front door. 

Ten minutes later he was pulling into the park. It was dusk and the area had only a few older kids hanging out. Max was sitting on a swing, casually pushing herself with one leg back and forth. She spotted Steve as soon as he pulled in and jumped up to run to his car. He had barely parked before she was throwing open the passenger seat and sliding in.

In the brief glow of the overhead light, Steve saw her eyes were red but dry, and she looked calmer than she had sounded earlier. As soon as she was buckled in, Steve put the car in drive.

“Where to, Mad Max?”

“Can we get something to eat? I’m starving. This ALWAYS fucking happens at dinner, I swear.”

“Language,” Steve muttered, unthinking. Max scoffed then giggled.

“You’re such a grandpa.”

“Yeah, yeah, smartass,” said Steve the hypocrite. He smiled. “Spaghetti and meatballs sound good?”

“Are you kidding?! Holy crap that sounds perfect. I have been CRAVING pasta.”

It took the full 15 minutes to get back to Steve’s place. Max filled the drive with chatter, about Lucas, the classes she was taking, and the car she was saving up for. She carried on when they got into his duplex. While he heated sauce (his mom’s) and cooked the spaghetti (store bought), she complained about her job at the arcade. As she scoured his kitchen cabinets for plates and cutlery, then loaded up their plates, she bragged about her high scores on five of the games they carried. When they sat down in front of the TV and Steve put on the news, Max had something to say about every story. An hour later, after she’d gotten seconds, perused his VHS collection, and told Steve about a book she was reading (in detail), she finally seemed to lose steam. It was getting a little late, but Steve didn’t want to take her back to someplace she didn’t feel safe. Before he could figure out how to broach the subject, she piped up.

“Could I use your phone?”

“Of course!” Steve stood up to take her to it, then sat back down when she whizzed past him to grab it from the wall. As she was dialing, Steve gathered their plates to take to the sink. He didn’t want to eavesdrop but also felt a strange responsibility for the girl that demanded he stay near, so he leaned back against the counter to wait with her. 

Max was tense, but she shot him a grateful smile when he took up his post. Whoever she was calling answered, and Max relaxed.

“Hey mom. 
 I’m at Steve’s. 
 What? 
 I don’t know! 
 Can’t I- Okay! I’ll ask! Hey, Steve, can I stay with you tonight?” 

Steve was flabbergasted. His face must have shown it.

“Please? Mom doesn’t want me going home.” Max was putting on a strong facade, but there were large, obvious cracks in it; Steve could not turn her away.

“Of course.” 

She nodded quickly, her eyes wide and wet.

“He said yes, mom. Will you tell me what’s going on?” Max got quiet as she listened, and Steve decided that this was something he could leave her to. He went to his bedroom to change his sheets - Max could sleep in his bed, and he’d sleep on the couch. He found a pair of Dustin’s sweats that the boy had left here the last time they’d had a movie night and an old tshirt of his own that he’d grown out of before it got too ratty, and put them aside for her to sleep in if she wanted. Then he changed into his own pajamas - flannel pants and a too large shirt.

He made his way back out toward the kitchen. Max was still on the phone and she looked like she had cried, but there was a lightness to her face. She saw Steve and gave him a small smile.

“Yeah, mom. I love you, too. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Max hung up the phone and walked to Steve, then surprised the hell out of him by throwing her arms around him and hugging him tight.

“My mom’s leaving Neil,” she whispered.

“Oh. Um, wow. Is that-?” Steve did not know how to respond to this.

“It’s a good thing. He isn’t a good person.” Max burrowed her head into Steve’s chest. “Something bad happened tonight, she won’t tell me what, but. Mom says she’s getting a restraining order against him for her and me.” Steve didn’t know what to say to that. A restraining order? Jesus. 

“Are you going to be able to go back home?” He asked. She shrunk in on herself. “Sorry! I don’t know what happens with restraining orders. I don’t know how they work.” He awkwardly patted her back; strangely, it seemed to help.

“Mom says the sheriff says Neil will have to leave the house and find somewhere else to live. I guess there’s a lot of court stuff involved? I don’t know, but she said I should be able to go home tomorrow.” 

Steve nodded, then asked the question that had been burning in him.

“What about Billy?”

Max looked up at Steve, her face worried.

“I- I don’t know. Mom didn’t say anything about him! Oh god. Do you think Neil will hurt him? Can Billy get a restraining order?” She seemed to be genuinely asking Steve, who was left grasping for calm.

“Billy’s not going to be back until next week, right? Your mom needs to call him and tell him what’s going on. I don’t know- he doesn’t tell me-.” Steve took a deep breath. “Max, does Billy need a restraining order against his dad?”

Her voice was small and her eyes shifted away when she said, “I don’t know.” She was quiet a moment, chewing on her lip, before she finally met his eyes, held them, and nodded her head. Steve nodded back, his mind racing.

“Tomorrow, we’ll talk to Billy. For now, I think we should watch a movie, eat some ice cream, and get some sleep.” 

Max obviously wasn’t expecting this response, but she agreed readily. Steve offered her the sleep clothes, which she accepted, and gave her the spare toothbrush that had come in the two-pack he’d bought last time. She closed herself in the bathroom to change, and appeared moments later, demanding ice cream and to watch Fright Night. Steve sighed at the movie - not his first choice, especially after an emotionally wrought night, but if that’s what would take Max out of her head, then that’s what they would watch.

Thirty minutes into the movie Max was nodding off against the back of the couch. Steve paused the tape and chivvied the girl toward the bedroom. She didn’t argue, drifting sleepily down the hall and climbing into the bed, face soft and eyes half closed. She laid down and turned over with a quiet “Night.” 

“Good night, Max.” Steve left the door open and went into the bathroom to brush his teeth and prepare to sleep. He kept the light in the bathroom on and pulled the door almost fully closed, so Max could find it if she needed it in the middle of the night. Then he grabbed a spare pillow and blanket from the closet. After making sure the front door was locked and the kitchen wasn’t a disaster, he made up his couch nest, turned off the lights, and put on Sixteen Candles. 

~

This came in fits and spurts after a long day on the road. I read over it to check for any glaring errors but I know I missed some stuff.

ANYWAY!!!! I really enjoyed writing this scene. It would definitely come after the last scene I posted, but I'm not sure if there will be anything in between.

I have a good bit written for this story, but I'm kind of just writing as it comes to me, and posting little bits here and there. I will be editing it into a cohesive THING at some point and posting it in its entirety.

I really hope y'all are enjoying this! Cause I am LOVING writing it.

7 years ago
Sooooo.....I Finally Drew My Own Sides.... Let Me Introduce You To Them....

Sooooo.....I finally drew my own sides.... let me introduce you to them....


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9 months ago

Tips for writing those gala scenes, from someone who goes to them occasionally:

Generally you unbutton and re-button a suit coat when you sit down and stand up.

You’re supposed to hold wine or champagne glasses by the stem to avoid warming up the liquid inside. A character out of their depth might hold the glass around the sides instead.

When rich/important people forget your name and they’re drunk, they usually just tell you that they don’t remember or completely skip over any opportunity to use your name so they don’t look silly.

A good way to indicate you don’t want to shake someone’s hand at an event is to hold a drink in your right hand (and if you’re a woman, a purse in the other so you definitely can’t shift the glass to another hand and then shake)

Americans who still kiss cheeks as a welcome generally don’t press lips to cheeks, it’s more of a touch of cheek to cheek or even a hover (these days, mostly to avoid smudging a woman’s makeup)

The distinctions between dress codes (black tie, cocktail, etc) are very intricate but obvious to those who know how to look. If you wear a short skirt to a black tie event for example, people would clock that instantly even if the dress itself was very formal. Same thing goes for certain articles of men’s clothing.

Open bars / cash bars at events usually carry limited options. They’re meant to serve lots of people very quickly, so nobody is getting a cosmo or a Manhattan etc.

Members of the press generally aren’t allowed to freely circulate at nicer galas/events without a very good reason. When they do, they need to identify themselves before talking with someone.

10 months ago
Growing.
Growing.
Growing.
Growing.

Growing.

7 months ago

How to be a trans ally 101, from To Wong Foo (1995)

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MagicKizu

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