There’s no third, funny option, just the first two because it’s good to just support people because they deserve support.
A silent Cyrus. A broken TJ. A memory that helps them heal
•••
It’s a cold Friday afternoon, cloudy skies and chilly air, the complete opposite from last week. Cyrus guesses it is fitting, the weather just how he has been feeling lately; gray, dull and sad.
It´s been a week since the costume day fiasco.
The girls’ basketball team practice just ended. While the players walk to the locker room, Buffy looks towards the bleachers, looking for him.
Their eyes meet and he nods his head to let her know he will be waiting for her right outside the gym, as always. He knows she is worried; Andi is too. He has been quiet and has refused to tell them how he feels, because if he does, he knows everything will feel more real. For now, he prefers the numbness.
As he walks through the double doors, he sees someone standing in front of the vending machine. Even though the person is not facing Cyrus and has the hoodie up, he already knows who he is. He thinks about turning around and leave, but for some reason his legs refuse to move. He has been avoiding TJ since last Friday, ignoring his texts and calls, walking away when he finds him on the hallways, he even suspended his social media accounts. He just doesn’t feel ready to hear whatever the blonde boy has to say, not yet. But maybe this is the way the universe wants things to be.
He thinks it is time to get this over with, maybe after today they can finally agree that they´re not friends anymore, the mere thought hurting enough to make his numbness evaporate. With that he takes a few steps forward and stands by the other boy´s side, that is when he notices how down the basketball captain looks; messy hair, bags under his eyes, slumped shoulders.
Right then he lets himself think: Is it possible that TJ feels as miserable as he does? What if the green-eyed guy values their friendship as much as Cyrus does? What if his calls were not to cut ties forever?
He feels guilty now.
He pushes the thoughts aside because having that kind of hope right now can only be dangerous.
Apparently, TJ hasn’t noticed his presence yet. He has this intent gaze, deep in thought, looking at the items on the vending machine as if they will give him the answers he needs.
Without noticing, the smaller boy sighs and that’s when it happens. Their eyes meet and time stops. They stand there, staring at each other, not saying a thing but with longing looks, missing one another even when they are right there, just a few feet apart. How silly! Cyrus thinks. It´s only been a week, but the truth is that it feels like it has been ages since the last time they talked.
TJ´s blinks and his eyes get watery and hands fidgety. He opens and closes his mouth, as if trying to put into words what he wants to say. Cyrus just stands there, waiting in silence.
“I´m so, so sorry Cy” TJ says, his voice heavy with shame, not meeting the brunette´s eyes. “I miss you”
Another quiet minute passes, Cyrus doesn’t know how to answer. He guesses TJ takes the lack of words as a refusal to his ¨apology¨ because what he says next surprises him
“I´m scared” He whispers, his voice soft and fragile.
More silence from Cyrus, he is just at a loss for words. He has never seen his friend this broken. He wants to hug him, comfort him, make his pain go away. But his own pain stops him, he needs to protect himself too.
Cyrus waits for TJ to elaborate, but he stays quiet. He just looks back at the vending machine, with nostalgia written all over his face.
The browned-eyed boy follows his line of sight and his heart skips a beat when he notices what the other boy is looking at.
“Are we going to be ok?” TJ says, shaky voice and uncertainty coloring his features.
Cyrus looks down and thinks about it for a moment. He can feel TJ´s expectant stare on him, noticing his clenched fists too. He makes his decision.
He leaves the room and goes back inside the gym, leaving TJ standing where he found him, with a defeated expression on his face.
After a few seconds he is back, with the backpack he forgot at the bleachers on his shoulder. His friend still glued to the spot where he left him, clearly confused. He unzips his front pocket, takes out a dollar, taps 3 0 7 into the vending machine an waits for it to give him his snack.
For a little while the buzzing of the device is the only sound filling the air. Then the muffled sound of a plastic bag falling.
Cyrus takes it and hands it to TJ.
Cheese Puffs.
TJ takes it and holds it with both hands delicately, as if afraid that it would break. He meets Cyrus ‘eyes and tells him with determination in his voice
“I´m gonna make this right, I promise”. Cyrus just shrugs slowly as a response, his eyes a little bit softer than before.
“Cy, are you ready to go?”. He hears Buffy´s tense voice calling from behind. He nods, still looking at TJ
He lingers for a few moments, then turns around and walks away with Buffy by his side.
TJ stays there, presses the cheese puffs closer to his chest and repeats to himself with a hint of a smile
“I´m gonna make this right”
AM Cast hanging out :,) - taken from Joshua Rush stories
#find yourself someone who talks like this [ ii / iii ]
+ BONUS:
“No, keep going. I like it when you keep going.” — Lucas Friar, GM Great Lady of New York, after Riley says sorry for rambling.
Lucas Friar offering a seat next to him for Riley so she could sleep (where afterwards she tells him she just wants to talk to him) and they left the ski lodge holding hands. GM Ski Lodge II, after choosing Riley and asking her to choose him.
At Target this lady told her son he couldn’t have a Wonder Woman doll because “that’s for girls” and then bought her daughter the same one. It got me thinking about how often I see people bar young boys from appreciating girls/women as protagonists and heroes, and my own experience with it as a kid.
“My Anne with an E. It always has been and always will be... You.”
@ungaroyals @lovelierbitsoflife why am I just seeing this?? 😱 THANK YOU!! for you to say that I have the potential to write is aghfisbdheh! … it truly is the biggest compliment :,)
what I love the most about their dynamic (Simon ∞Wille) is this feeling they give me of never ending shared energy? For me, where one is the other one is, too. Like from the moment they met (and it intensified after they kissed) they carry each other within them, and that presence influences everything that happens after… not sure if that makes any sense at all lol. It is just that they have such an all-around way of loving each other, like they commit all of their senses to the experience of knowing each other, of being lucky enough to exist at the same time and space. Maybe it’s just me but I love how, even though they are amazing individuals, once they collide, the entity they become feels so wholesome and right. Like “coming home” :,) …anyways! Love your writing and the content you share, always excited whenever you post!
This was so beautifully written omg. I fully understand what you mean. 'they are amazing individuals, once they collide, the entity they become feels so wholesome and right. Like coming home.' ugh you got me with that.
No parent should have an “if I get deported” conversation with their child.
Boss: TJ, you are a great employee and I really don’t want to let you go, but I’m gonna need a very good explanation from you for that not to happen...
TJ: Remember how you say everyday that the customer is always right??
Boss: Seriously Kippen?...
TJ: ...And that “if it’s in our hands, we should go above and beyond to make sure they leave happy and satisfied ”??... Your words, not mine!
Boss, to himself: Oh God, I think I know where this is going...
TJ: ... the customer seemed upset and this specific request was literally in my hands! Technically I was just following your instructions!
Boss, trying to keep his composure: Bringing the customer to your side of the counter and hugging him from behind, your chin on his shoulder, while still taking orders at the register doesn’t meet that criteria!!
TJ, looking down at Cyrus, still wrapped in his arms: But that’s what the customer asked for! right muffin??
Cyrus: Yes sir, I specifically said “ I want a long and tight hug from my boyfriend, for here please”
Boss, conflicted: You could have waited until lunch break!
Cyrus, with guilty puppy eyes: I might have added the word “Now” at the end of the order... please don’t fire him, it’s all my fault...
TJ: Sir, how can one say No to those eyes?!!
Boss, defeated and sighing: Fine! I’ll let you go with a warning this time, but don’t let it happen again... and honestly, I don’t think I can fire you, your mom would never forgive me if I did
Cyrus, relieved: Thank you Mr. Kippen! Won’t happen again, we promise!
TJ, whispering while dragging Cyrus out the door with him: Talk for yourself...
Mr. Kippen: I heard that Thelonious!!.. Don’t be late for dinner!!
Cyrus’ voice from the distance: See you tonight sir!! I’ll bring dessert !!
Mr. Kippen, soft smile and rubbing his temple while making a phone call: You won’t believe what our silly son did today, that kid is so in love...
I FEEL LIKE EVERYONE NEEDS TO SEE THIS
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