Really? This Broad Can’t Think Of One Time Jesus Got In Trouble With The Law? Like, Once? Where It

Winona Ryder in Heathers (1988) Natalia Dyer in Stranger Things (2016)

Stop adding stupid fucking photos to this post!!!

“learn how to take a joke”

why don’t you learn how to make one

Normally I don’t post celebrities Instagrams but I think this is noteworthy.

mime owners: this is claude st. pierre, we adopted him two years ago. he’s a third generation french mime with roots in the early carnie awakening. we only feed him hand toasted vegan peanuts and paleo candy floss

fool owners: this is hoops he likes jokes

I would like to announce that from now on my blog is going to exclusively post really niche memes aimed at pirates

“Ah, Perry the platypus!”

“What an unexpected -“

“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!”

“You’re trapped!”

“By societal convention!”

“Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”

“That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down.”

Me: reblogs cute picture Me: the government is corrupt and wants nothing more than to kill you Me: reblogs funny post

You run a tattoo parlor. Every couple of weeks, the same customer comes in, always requesting the same tattoo: an additional tally mark on an ever-growing cluster of tally marks.

Your fav is problematic: Chris Pratt

his skin reacts to sun light

he doesn’t have the decency to powder his skin like his fellow Victorian nobility 

evVERY TIME SOMEONe FOLLOWS ME I JUSt imagine them like