This Picture I Took Of Hector While I Was Drunk Last Night Looks Like A Damn Renaissance Painting

getting up at 6 am by choice: wow what a beautiful sunrise! the house is so peaceful and quiet. i feel really tired but i don't have to do anything but just sit here and enjoy the morning. what a pleasant feeling

getting up at 6 am because you have to: these covers draped upon my mortal coil have become the dirt above my casket. my corpse refuses to unsettle the earth to rise from its grave. i have been dead for centuries and have no intentions to assimilate once more into the tragic world of the living

when you check out someone’s blog and it’s 99% discourse

Laser Engraving

aragorn and legolas but theyre tired camp counselors

rip if you use headphones bc I’m fucking Loud but here it is for those who wanted it. he’s mad because he wants to get outside

Coping strategy for when you are trapped in conversations with obnoxious people:

1. Pick a spot nearby, around eye level, preferably a small object. That is now the camera. 2. When they say something you just cannot stand, look directly into the camera like you’re on The Office 3. Repeat as often as needed

PLEASE 

please watch this john mulaney bit from snl of him complaining about how computers ask us if we are robots it is hilarious 10/10 would recommend

why is it so hard 2 make friends :(