It's The 21st Century And I'm Dealing With Wood Heating Like It's Still Pre Industrial Times. There's

Thinking back, I guess one of the more surreal episodes of my life is when I would serve Mass as an altar boy and I was wearing my Slayer Reign in Blood t-shirt under my cassock. Then biked home listening to Morbid Angel on my Walkman. Just doing my part for minor blasphemy.

If you're considering going rural to bake pies in a cute cabin, realize this is what your life is going to look like. Barring a sizeable trust fund, that is.

It's time for a drastic change in politics. We need more transparency and honesty in our parties.

I propose a new party, the Party of the Dark Star. There will be weird rituals, orgiastic caucusing, and the party motto will be "Blood for the Blood God".

Purposefully targeting civilian infrastructure is a war crime. Purposefully using civilian infrastructure to shield military infrastructure is a war crime. Destruction of civilian housing without immediate military necessity is a war crime. Targeting civilians for killing and kidnapping is a war crime. Collective punishment in any instance is a war crime.

People need to quit it with these simplified, asinine shit takes on an extremely long running and complicated situation. It doesn't boil down to simplistic slogans fed to you by some blood and soil types hiding behind leftie platitudes or dipshits that still read the Protocols of Elder Zion and masturbate to it. There is no binary good guy/bad guy here. It's a proxy war, and in a proxy war the people who suffer are civilians just trying to live.

Do yourself a favor and if you're a fucking anti-semite, just be honest about it. If that makes you uncomfortable, why? Using a war thousands of miles away as an excuse to join the tiki torch crowd is an eleven on the asinine scale.

Nevermind the rather huge amounts of social pressure to comply with a draft notice (prison sentences, loss of benefits, good luck finding a job outside a few major metropolitan areas). Or the fact that everyone who fled the country to avoid the draft had no way of knowing Carter would pardon them, so basically had signed up to never set foot on American soil ever again. Or messing around with your draft status had an immediate and really bad effect on immigration proceedings of you and your family.

So if you did have the resources available to dodge the draft, do you think the Pentagon just reduced the number of inductees by one? No, they simply found a poor person, usually of color, that lacked those resources to take your place.

Engraved Zippo lighters from the Vietnam War.

~ Cowan’s Auctions

I'm fascinated by the history of the Grand Guignol. Even read the collection of translated plays, and properly done with modern practical effects, they could still hold up today. If anything, it's deserving of a revival, possibly in concert with some dark burlesque and apropos musical acts.

So in the interests of development of life skills, I'm going to pass down a bit of wisdom that will serve you well.

When one encounters a strange, obviously old, most definitely not a copy of the Readers Digest yearly compilation book in some strange place-perhaps like on a basalt altar you found in a cave hiking, or on a bloodstained table in the root cellar of your cousin's remote hunting cabin- there are certain rules for best practices.

1. We do not touch the book. Let it lie otherwise you'll die.

2. We do not open the book. Maybe circumstances have dictated you have to pick up the book or move it. Let it stay closed.

3. FOR ALL THAT IS SACRED, WE DO NOT I REPEAT NOT READ ALOUD FROM IT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. WE DO NOT TELL OUR FRIENDS THAT THE LATIN IS FUNNY AND READ IT ALOUD TO ILLUSTRATE THE POINT OR SOUND OUT SOME GIBBERISH PHONETICALLY. YOUR EYEBALLS STAY OFF THE PAGE, AND YOUR MOUTH DARE NOT SPEAK THE WORDS.

Practice safe eldritch knowledge.

To be precise, the "all female crew" aboard the flaming phallic symbol were not crew, they were cargo. They did not interact with the flight computer, they did not relay information on craft condition to ground crew, they got buckled in by others and bounced around during zero G.

btw the katy perry/bezos' girlfriend/other four irrelevant billionaires 10 minute space stunt was not the first all female expedition no matter how much they try to market it as such. the first all female mission was in 1963 with soviet cosmonauts Valentina Tereshkova, Irina Solovyova and Valentina Ponomaryova - all three of which were working class and had to pass incredibly hard exams to be chosen from 400 potential candidates. just in case we started falling for the propaganda machine again

Things they never told you as a child, nor did you think was coming:

You will have a favorite kitchen tool like a spatula or flipper

You will excitedly seek out new cups

You will have a preference as to food storage

You will have a signature dish