Soulsborne Final Bosses Poorly Explained

Soulsborne Final Bosses poorly explained

Dark Souls: God is senile, forcibly retire him.

Dark Souls 2: Lich King Cersei Lannister tricked you into doing her dirty work or Treebeard with the One Ring beats your ass.

Dark Souls 3: Parry all you want, you can’t parry the feels.

Sekiro: Swordsman hatches from grandson, shoots you in face.

Bloodborne: Local paraplegic regains use of legs specifically to kick your ass. Failing that, the moon does it for him.

Elden Ring: Kill God’s malesona and pet amoeba.

More Posts from K0tapng and Others

2 years ago
4 years ago

lot of people harbor the subconscious opinion that poc (especially black people) have to be grateful and trip over themselves with thanks for every crumb they get. that’s why you have people angry at john boyega rightfully talking about how he doesn’t fw star wars. that’s why you have people telling you not to criticize any “representation” or “diversity” in books and on tv. y’all are projecting this “don’t bite the hand that feeds you” mentality onto us not realizing that we aren’t getting fucking fed.

2 years ago
Im Literally Forever Obsessed With This Because It Implies The Following:

im literally forever obsessed with this because it implies the following:

The Rapture, as described by Christian Evangelicals, has happened

Parents witnessed their son disappear during The Rapture, but remained atheists anyway (based)

Instead of sinners and nonbelievers going to hell or getting killed, they just... stay on Earth.

2 years ago

Jeph Jacques decided to go out in a blaze of shitposts and in his honor I think it's only right to share these tweets with a wider audience

jeph jacques twitter with the display name as elon musk and the pfp is the picture of a younger balding elon musk. text says: the remaining staff at twitter are actively bullying me now. Jed from accounting called me a "little baby bitchboy" to my face and nobody even said anything. I mean obviously I fired him and I'm having my goons break his wife's legs, but still. it hurts :(
jeph jacques twitter with the display name as elon musk and the pfp is the picture of a younger balding elon musk. text says: some joker impersonating me said I drink my own urine every morning. this is false. I drink it at various times of the day
jeph jacques twitter with the display name as elon musk and the pfp is the picture of a younger balding elon musk. text says: I love comedy. can't get enough of it. but using jokes to speak truth to power? absolutely disgusting.
jeph jacques twitter with the display name as elon musk and the pfp is the picture of a younger balding elon musk. text says: why would anybody ever punch UP? punching down means you won't get your ass kicked. it's obvious.
jeph jacques twitter with the display name as elon musk and the pfp is the picture of a younger balding elon musk. text says: I support Free Speech on Twitter, unless you're making fun of me, which is illegal.

goodnight, sweet prince

blank twitter heading of jeph jacques's twitter account. text says Account Suspended
3 years ago
P8cr8 😊
P8cr8 😊
P8cr8 😊
P8cr8 😊
P8cr8 😊

p8cr8 😊

2 years ago

further evidence toward my thesis that a big part of fromsoft's games is that the devs are all massive trolls and masters of physical comedy

(i wanted to add this elden ring video from twitter to a reblog of another post but i forgot you cant do that so im making a post about it)

original tweet

2 years ago

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

2 years ago
Silly Lil Pot Boi, He Is Not Very Happy

silly lil pot boi, he is not very happy

3 years ago

Do you support minor self diagnosis?

I started cracking my knuckles in fifth grade. My parents asked me why, and I told them it made the pain go away. My parents told me that I was too young for my joints to hurt, and that I would ruin them if I kept cracking them.

By the time was fourteen or fifteen and entering high school, I hadn’t stopped cracking my knuckles. The hurt more, and the relief was more. I was convinced that I had arthritis.

My parents told me that I was too young to have arthritis.

Fast forward thirty seven years when my joints take a dive and I cannot even get out of bed on some days. I take chemo therapy pills twice a week, and I have two injections of chemotherapy ever four months. I have to take two medications every day just to manage the pain the chemotherapy doesn’t cover.

This at least allows me to get out of bed and on most days it allows me to go to school. It doesn’t make the pain go away, and on bad days I want to cry it gets so bad.

The diagnosis? Early Onset Rheumatoid Arthritis.

It went unchecked for twenty five years, my immune system eating away at my joints like a buffet even though I wanted to go to the doctor from day one.

If I had gone to the doctor and I had been wrong - they found nothing - well, we would have been out a few bucks for the doctor’s visit.If I was right - and I was right - I would have been treated for 20 years.

If I had gone to the doctor on my insistence that I had arthritis at fifteen, I would not be in pain today. This would have been treated twenty years go.

Do I support minor self diagnosis?

Yes. Absolutely.

I would rather a minor self diagnose and be wrong than a minor ignore their body and suffer for 20 years like me. No one is harmed by listening to a minor and taking their concerns seriously. But that minor might be harmed for the rest of their life you ignore them.

My choice is always to listen to the minors about their bodies.

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k0tapng - Mendacious Fool Over Here…
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