I Think Its So Funny That The Empires People Know What Christmas Is This Season. They Used To Only Have

not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl… what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀

truly some people have no genre savviness whatsoever. A girl came back from the dead the other day and fresh out of the grave she laughed and laughed and lay down on the grass nearby to watch the sky, dirt still under her nails. I asked her if she’s sad about anything and she asked me why she should be. I asked her if she’s perhaps worried she’s a shadow of who she used to be and she said that if she is a shadow she is a joyous one, and anyway whoever she was she is her, now, and that’s enough. I inquired about revenge, about unfinished business, about what had filled her with the incessant need to claw her way out from beneath but she just said she’s here to live. I told her about ghosts, about zombies, tried to explain to her how her options lie between horror and tragedy but she just said if those are the stories meant for her then she’ll make another one. I said “isn’t it terribly lonely how in your triumph over death nobody was here to greet you?” and she just looked at me funny and said “what do you mean? The whole world was here, waiting”. Some people, I tell you.

the parkour god and the chosen one

+ w/o the spotlight

i watched the first parkour civilization movie and its like. 2 hours of youtube shorts tied together. its so funny, they reestablish the plot like 200 times throughout the whole move. everyone's ego is beyond fragile and no one has ever heard of a 360 jump or a backwards jump somehow

“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.

I think- Pearl, you deserve this more.

it's really weird having a first dog be blind and then getting a second who can see...like how was I supposed to be prepared for this.

this creature can perceive when I put the treats up on the high shelf. or when I hide stuff behind my back. I can't fool her!! she's always watching me and she shouldn't have this much knowledge!!!

I walk around at night and I shine my flash light directly into her eyes and I'll just be standing there staring at her weird blue orbs for like 5 seconds until I realize it's probably extremely annoying to her, because she has eyes!! I'll turn on the light in the room and she gruffs and grumbles like ?? oh right!! light wakes you up!! the fuck??

half a witch

me defending katara: write an entire essay on why fandom treating her as an adult is missing the point of her character when she wants to be able to act like a kid. she wants to be playful and join in on the fun. she's barely the long-suffering "mom" who sighs at everyone else's shenanigans and ignoring her playful side is a huge disservice to her character. she isn't actually that mean to toph and honestly tried to extend her friendship to toph multiple times, it was toph who was being bullheaded and unhelpful towards katara. her being mad at zuko the longest was actually completely justified and it doesn't matter if sokka forgave him faster because katara isn't sokka and she isn't obligated to forgive someone just because her brother did. she actually didn't "talk non-stop" about her mom you guys just hate to see a female character focus on her trauma while writing a million essays on why zuko is the saddest boy to ever sad boy.

me defending aang: if you hate him you will die and go to hell.

most inaccurate thing about minecraft story mode is that no one looked like this