Alien: You’re telling me that in times of great distress humans have been known to suddenly gain the strength necessary to lift objects more than a dozen times their own weight?!
Human: Yeah, it’s called “hysterical strength” and it usually happens in life-or-death situations, like when someone gets stuck under a car or something and someone lifts the car to get them out. We can’t really test it though, ‘cause it only happens spontaneously.
Alien: Humans have the ability to tap into untold strength and power and you don’t even know how you do it?
Human: Pretty much, yeah. We think it has something to do with temporary analgesia, so we just don’t feel the pain we should when we pick up a 3000-pound car.
Alien: YOUR PAIN RESPONSE JUST SHUTS OFF?
Human: Yeah, it’s like an adrenaline thing? Do you not have that?
Alien: Fuck you and your entire species of tiny juggernauts.
via @defineyourgrind
Like or reblog this if you think it is ok for guys to wear girls clothes and girls to wear guys clothes keep scrolling if you think it is not ok
“i’m gay”
dan. i know coming out is weird and difficult and awkward and happy and sad. but thank you. thank you for making me feel accepted even when you weren’t out. thank you for preaching acceptance and love for the past few years. thank you for stamping yourself into our hearts and showing us it’s okay to be who we are regardless of sexuality. thank you for opening your mind and soul to us. thank you for sharing even more of yourself. you didn’t have to but you did and have made thousands of people feel even more loved and accepted. i know it may have been extremely difficult but you have made such a big difference in my life. we wouldn’t be the same without you. thank you thank you thank you.
Gryffindor: HAPPY 2020, GUYSS!!
Hufflepuff: Wow, new year! New hopes, new resolutions!
Slytherin: I just want this shit to end already.
Ravenclaw: There are two kinds of people.
Wine bottle
My mom accidentally dropped a bottle of wine, after that she came to me.
Mom: „Look, this is a good bottle, stable and well-built“
Me: „I wish my life would be that stable and well-built”
She laughed at me. Like literally laughed, thanks mom; thanks.
Me rn, but i finished it and now i dont know what to do with life
Except mybe going to work tomorrow...
God I hate my life
you ever get sucked into a fic so bad that you read when you walk you read when you lie you read when you pee you read when you’re in rhe middle of a conversation and you read when you drive and when you crave sleep but still read and the first thing you do in the morning is opening ao3 to read that fic and then the fic ends and your life seems empty like a shell thrown out of the sea
Exactly.
Team “not actually oblivious to flirting, just terrified of appearing presumptuous” represent.
You know what makes me fucking mad?
We are talking about how men should be able to be feminine or women should be able to be masculine. But that whole topic is so fucking stupid, like why do even entitle ourselves to talk about this.
We talk about this topic and how we all should break this norm. And it makes me so mad to even think about breaking the roles we are assigned for.
Because we do not have the right to talk about this!
Because as soon as the topic is about transgender men or women it is off limits that they could even dare to not be like the norm. So why do we entitle ourselves to talk about cis women and cis men breaking these norms?
A transgender woman liking football, cars or anything “masculine” or a transgender man liking for example pink, Make-up or well anything “feminine” then they get hate, called out for something ridiculous and called fake. I also do not like the term transgender at all, you are either a woman or a man or both or neither or something in between. But saying he/she is transgender is like saying, they are a man/woman but not really. transmen and transwomen are Men or Women (Binary or Non-binary does not matter!) but calling them trans is like saying (for me it is at least) that they are not truly a man or a woman.
That’s not okay, liking something, preferring something.
It doesn’t make you less man or woman!
23frogs are bitches and we don’t negotiate with terorrists.
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