Latest Posts by hatsunevitu - Page 6

so i’ve been thinking A LOT about kyman love languages recently and here’s what i’ve come up with:

kyle’s love language is definitely help.

he’s pretty used to helping those in need and that is how he usually shows affection. he doesn’t say “i love you” or hugs cartman often, but when he has a chance to stay at cartman’s room he will subconsciously clean up everything here and there; he keeps an eye on whether cartman is taking his meds; he will casually tuck him in at a sleepover, help cartman with his homework (constantly grumbling about cartman’s laziness), buy his favourite chocolate bar at the store… but he will never admit he actually cares about cartman, neither will he accept the same help from eric. he will deny it and make excuses although everyone understands how much he really protects cartman.

in response he loves to get affection with quality time!

he won’t admit it but he loves dates for just the two of them.

what about cartman, uh, he mostly expresses his love with physical touching.

and it’s so. so. terrible. cartman knows how much kyle hates pda so he usually tries to embarrass kyle with unexpected kisses in public :D cartman’s the type to intervene kyle’s conversation to demonstratively hug him from the back and kiss his neck and then just go away without any explanation leaving kyle all blushing and distracted. kyle is seriously pissed off every time so they have the same dialogue every goddamn week:

kyle: Did you really have to kiss me in front of everyone?

cartman: That Mexican dude was obviously hitting on you.

kyle: I don’t even know his name, asshole!

cartman: What’s the problem, Kyle? Can’t I just kiss my boyfriend when I feel like it? Is it prohibited? Or are you just homophobic?

kyle: I can’t even tell how tired of your bullcrap I am.

cartman: Because, Kyle, last time I checked America was a free country! Where people like me could kiss people like you whenever they want!!

kyle: Do you even hear yourself?

cartman: Anyway, didn’t you like it though?

kyle, blushing: It was… fine, I guess…

and in response cartman loves to get attention with words of affirmation or praise.

he’s so desperate to get praised by kyle :( i mean nobody really says nice things to him except for his own mother so every time kyle says something like “wow, cartman, you did a great job, huh… that’s surprising…” and cartman can’t hide these happy sparkles in his eyes. also it’s the highest reward for him to be called “eric” by kyle.

this might seem like a little unusual brotp but has anyone else thought about tweek and cartman’s possible friendship? i have no idea how exactly i came up with this, but i, personally, as a very (and i mean it) anxious person noticed that although i try to avoid every possible dangerous situation, i still like these chaotic people whose life is a complete mess because i feel more, uh, alive around them? and it just seems like something that tweek would like to do?

he tends to try to overcome his fears by facing them so being close to someone like cartman is a great way for this. i mean, can you really still be afraid of other people when you’re friends with someone as fucked up as eric cartman?

tweek is kinda afraid of this chaotic and terrifying lifestyle that cartman has, but then he keeps getting involved in dangerous shit that cartman usually does, and eric always finds a way out of every hopeless situation with minimum harm, and it helps tweek to deal with less life-threatening things.

he goes like “Yesterday Cartman took me with him to rob a bank and I had to bail him out of jail and then the building exploded ‘cuz he had made a fucking bomb while being behind bars. Do you really think I can be nervous because of an exam? Bold of you to assume anything can possibly scare me now.” (c) tweek tweak ig

they also have this constant funny banter like “jeez tweek go take your meds already” – “you take your meds!!!” and it’s so extremely hilarious like literally NO ONE understands how it is possible for them to be friends

my favorite thing about s11e8 (le petit tourette) is definitely this scene in the very end.

cartman sounds so sincere like he never usually does, and, according to the plot, he wasn’t able to lie or even control his words at that moment. i like to think that all this “i love you man, thank you kyle” is how cartman truly feels about kyle. i mean usually he wouldn’t bother with anything more than a simple “thank you, kyle”. like, it must really mean something if he is so unexpectedly affectionate exactly when he’s unable to control what he’s saying, right?

more lesbian heidi x gay kyle brosistp because i love them with all my heart!!!!

the first part of how their friendship started is here :3

they both can’t really accept their sexualities and strongly believe they’re straight even when it’s so clear they’re not.

like literally there are times when heidi shows kyle a photo of a pretty girl on her instagram and sighs asking kyle: “Isn’t she the most beautiful person in the world? She’s so captivating!”

and kyle just stares at her indifferently and responds in a monotonous voice barely even looking at the picture: “Yeah, she has nice features, I guess?”

and then there’s this time when heidi mentions cartman’s appearance with a bit of disgust but in a way “all boys are ugly, but cartman is, uh…” and kyle starts defending him unexpextedly even for himself like:

kyle: I mean, yeah, he’s fat and has a shitty personality, but, um, I don’t know, he’s not that bad looking.

heidi: What do you mean “not that bad”?

kyle: Well, you know, he has these different eyes which is pretty cool and also, uh, his appearance is really… noticeable and… somehow different, I guess? And now that he started to take care of his looks, so… I think we shouldn’t judge others by how they look, but if we do I can’t deny that he can be, like, remotely attractive… He’s still an asshole though, but-

heidi, with a suspicious look on her face: Kyle?

kyle: Can we change the subject please I’m begging you.

heidi: Sure.

there’s something i’d like to share, and it’s this headcanon.

like. i have a whole kyman & weidi au about post-s21 heidi who’s trying to recover from her relationship with cartman and become the same kind, innocent and happy girl she was before. some of her friends (mostly wendy who hated heidi’s guts while her “cartman’s gf” arc but is actually quite caring and helpful for heidi seeing how she’s really willing to change) told her that in order to finally move on she has to apologise to kyle. she was feeling really guilty ‘cause of her behaviour… you know, telling kyle that antisemitic shit cartman has taught her and dumping him in s21e7. she never apologised to him properly and now she wanted to make a change.

so the au basically starts long time after heiman’s final breakup, when heidi finally has some strength to actually come up to kyle and apologise to him:

heidi: Hey, Kyle?

kyle, raising an eyebrow in surprise: Oh… Heidi?… I, um, didn’t expect to see you.

heidi: That’s… understandable. Listen, I just wanted to talk to you about something important. You’re not busy, are you?

kyle, looking back at kenny: No, no. Kenny, don’t you mind going to the class by yourself? I’ll talk to you later.

kenny, grinning and winking mockingly: (Sure, guys, take your time!)

kyle: …So, um, what did you want to discuss? Is it something about school?

heidi: No, no, it’s not. I, uh, I wanted to apologise to you. For how I acted before. You know, you really didn’t deserve this, Kyle. I was so mean to you when all you wanted was to make me feel better. It’s just… When I said all those horrible things that night, and when I made fun of you with Eri… with Cartman… I know you must hate me now, because I would hate me too if I were you. After all that time I spent feeling sorry for myself, making myself a victim instead of taking responsibility for my actions… I just wanted to let you know that I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was an awful person and I’m trying to change now.

kyle: Oh, wow. That’s nice to hear, but, Heidi, I never really hated you. I mean, you were dating Cartman, it’s only natural he spoiled and confused you and made you feel so much hatred and anger inside. I understand it and I really appreciate that you’re recovering now. Thanks for apologising!

heidi: You’re… you really are nice. No wonder he talked about you all the time, huh. …Well, um. I really have to go, but maybe if you don’t mind we could chat later. I’d really like to talk to you more.

kyle: Sure, Heidi! Maybe we can even hang out like friends, you know?

heidi, smiling brightly: Wow, that’d be great! Thanks again, Kyle! I’ll see you later then, I guess?

kyle: Yeah, see you, Heidi! It was nice talking to you!

and then kyle returns to kenny, who’s smiling knowingly and making inappropriate jokes:

kenny: So, how was it?

kyle: How was what?

kenny: Flirting with Cartman’s ex?

kyle: I didn’t flirt with her! She just apologised to me and told me she’d like to hang out sometimes.

kenny: U-huh, sure, dude. And that doesn’t seem kinda flirty to you?

kyle: I’m serious! It’s over, I dont feel anything for her and neither does she.

kenny: You kidding me? She was obviously hitting on you, Kyle! Oh, man, Cartman will be pissed off when he finds out!

kyle: You will not tell Cartman about this. And stop making this a big deal, get your own life already!

and the satisfaction and joy of finally getting a proper apology soon were replaced with irritation ‘cause kyle started to overthink things like he usually does. he started to think about heidi possibly having feelings for him while he really couldn’t feel the same so it kinda scared him. he didn’t want to hurt her or something by rejecting her, so he mostly tried to avoid her and acted really nervous around her. she tried to get closer with him, chat and something like that, but he only blushed and stuttered.

wendy having seen their interactions was quite annoyed. she wrongly assumed kyle had a crush on heidi and noticed with irritation that “this jerk can’t hide his feelings. he acts too much like he has something for you, heidi”. and heidi started to overthink too, ‘cause she really didn’t feel anything special for kyle and the possibility of having to reject him and break his heart again was just painful. so she started to avoid kyle too (‘cause they’re both stupid when it comes to dealing with other people’s emotions), making him even more convinced in her crushing on him.

so basically they avoid each other for like… at least a month before they finally have the talk.

kyle: Wait, Heidi!

heidi: Oh… hello, Kyle.

kyle: Heidi, listen to me carefully, I really need to tell you something. You’re a nice girl and I really, really like you–

heidi: (Oh, no…)

kyle: But I just can’t feel the same. I didn’t want to break your heart but Stan told me it’s only worse that I am giving you false hope, so, yeah… I am sorry, Heidi, you really are amazing, it’s just… uh…

heidi: Wait, what?

kyle: Please, just don’t start crying–

heidi: But you’re the one who’s in love with me! I was afraid to break your heart!

kyle: What? No, that’s nonsense! Kenny told me you were hitting on me.

heidi: Wendy told me you were hitting on me!

kyle: …So, wait, we don’t feel anything for each other?

heidi: I… guess so?

kyle: That’s… that’s a relief. I was so worried you’d be heartbroken.

heidi: Yeah, me too actually! But now we can hang out normally, without feeling awkward, right?

kyle, smiling: Sure we can!

and they really start to hang out and, moreover, i can see them becoming more like besties, you know… they hang out all the time and turns out they share a lot of hobbies together: they’re both history nerds, for example! but the main reason why they’re so similar is probably because they both suffer from sexuality crisis and internalised homophobia. they sure are gay & lesbian solidarity, huh. i’ve written a few words about heidi understanding she’s a lesbian here.

and we’re coming to a kyman part of story, because cartman is pissed off to see his ex and kyle getting along so well. everyone around him thinks it’s ‘cause he’s jealous and can’t just let heidi go, but the actual reason why he’s so frustrated is because of kyle spending so much time with a girl, lmao. he actually doesn’t really care about heidi anymore – though they are in fact kind of passively aggressive towards each other – but everyone else thinks otherwise. wendy gets really, really annoyed when cartman says something unpleasant about heidi and kyle spending their weekend together:

wendy: Will you stop bugging Heidi? She’s moved on, Cartman, get your own life and grow up already!

cartman, genuinely confused: Who the fuck cares about Heidi???

but not only wendy – kyle is the most surprised to see cartman getting so frustrated ‘cause of their friendship. he even tries to fight cartman after another unasked comment, genuinely not understanding why cartman is still so obsessed with him and heidi being friends (so oblivious lmao):

kyle: You said you don’t fucking care about Heidi anymore!!

cartman: I don’t!!!

kyle: Then why do you still go crazy when she spends her time with me?

cartman: …I’m just genuinely concerned for the poor girl. She has a risk of infection with jewish disease or something.

kyle: There’s no such thing as jewish disease, Fatass!!

and they continue arguing but cartman is distracted ‘cause he’s confused as hell and he keeps thinking why tf do i care and why do i hate seeing kyle with someone else wtf wtf wtf

and there’s like these scenes where cartman sneaks into kyle’s house and shows up at kyle’s room and then he sees kyle and heidi sitting on a bed together and laughing loudly at some nerdy documentary movie, and cartman gets all jelly and he glares at heidi like:

cartman: What is she doing here?

kyle: She’s watching a documentary with me. What are you doing in my room, Fatass?

so yeah basically that’s a slowburn about kyman and weidi and i can see candy&keidi brosistp so clearly.

TL;DR kyle is a confused homosexual heidi is a confused lesbian and they’re both oblivious af about their crushes :D

hear me out kyle and cartman are both the type to enjoy lovehate relationships in media. and they don’t really admit it but every time there’s a “normal” romantic love scene with a straight couple they literally die from boredom and cringe.

so basically tfbw au, they’re all just hanging out watching superhero movies at cartman’s. one moment they pause the movie – which is something dc-related ofc, ‘cause i strongly believe that both cartman and kenny are dc fans while stan and kyle love marvel more – to discuss plot twists and then the dialogue happens:

cartman: Guys, I’m telling you, Joker is totally into Batman.

stan: Don’t they hate each other?

kyle: Well, yes, they do, but that’s kind of the point.

stan: How can you be in love with someone you hate?

cartman: Dude, you don’t get it! It’s more about rivalry, passion and obsession, you know? It’s sort of a deep feeling.

kyle: Yeah, exactly, and that trope about opposites who attract, that’s just making this relationship even spicier. A new level of romance.

stan, with a concerned look on his face: U-huh… Seems familiar, doesn’t it, Kenny?…

kenny, nodding vaguely: (Yeah.)

AND KYMAN JUST SIT THERE completely unaware of the parallel stan has just drawn. innocent oblivious guys.

my favorite thing on earth is definitely the look on cartman’s face when he genuinely enjoys hanging out with kyle and they dont fight

i have this little funny headcanon on kenman brotp where kenny and cartman are both excellent liars, and can talk utter nonsense with the most convincing faces. cartman is just good at it ‘cause he lies a lot so he’s kinda had a lot of practice, and kenny usually covers his face with a hood so nobody can really look into his eyes. and not only they lie perfectly by themselves just for fun, they also have this incredible mental connection when cartman starts telling bs and kenny continues it without a moment of hesitation. and NOBODY can really tell when they’re really telling the truth.

k: (Hey, guys!)

c: Oh, here he is! Hey, Kenny, tell these assholes about that one time we went to jail together and made a bomb to escape! They don’t believe it really happened.

k, not hesitating one second : (Oh, that one time! Yeah, man, it was pretty crazy, our cellmate almost died that day. How was his name? Brian or something like that, right? And then remember when prison guards literally almost caught us so you–)

c, proudly smirking and whispering to kyle: That’s why he’s always the one to cover me up when my mom wants to find out where I am.

okay this might seem like a lil bit controversial topic but please imagine tfbw but if cartman knew what fancervice and queerbait meant. like. are you really telling me he wouldn’t use it to get more fans and attention and money? please. so i strongly believe he’d make kyle participate in this shit with him to get more profit, and when kyle found out about new romantic-ish scenes between human kite and racoon that cartman had just written into the script for human kite’s movie… kyle’d get completely furious so he went to cartman’s basement and tried to make a scene.

(also i know i can’t call super craig a side character but i believe kyle actually thinks that the main characters are the racoon and human kite. no offense to craig tho. oh and just in case: i do not support queerbaiting!!)

k: Fatass!

c: What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be at home reading your script!

k: I did read the script! And what the hell are all those scenes you’ve added? They make no sense!

c: Do not question my narrator’s talent, jew. I’m the one who’s in charge of writing, your task is to memorise it and worship me for all my hard work.

k: Really? Oh, really? “Hard work”, you say? What is this fucking moment, you fat piece of shit?

c: Which one, Kahl? Please, elaborate.

k: “The Racoon is on the verge of death, fighting for every breath, so Human Kite heroically decides to give him mouth-to-mouth. The camera switches to the reaction of other Friends, but loud sounds of CPR can be heard behind the scenes”.

c: Pretty dramatic, huh? I really outdid myself, didn’t I?

k: The whole new script is full of this shit! What’s the matter, Cartman?

c: You know, just decided to make your movie more inclusive and… spicy. Are you against it?

k: Yes! Yes, I am against it, I don’t want to participate in this! There are so many actually homosexual people and by doing this you erase them. That is wrong, unethical and also it’s freaking gay!

c: A-huh. So did I get it correctly, Kahl, that you don’t want to make our characters closer ‘cause that is in your opinion, and I quote, “gay”? What are you, homophobic?

k: Knock it off! Stop twisting my words, that is not what I said!

c: Then I see no reasons to reject my offer, Kyle.

k: It’s just so inappropriate and wrong!

c: What’s wrong about two male characters being close and emotionally attached to each other?

k: Everything! If it’s me and you – everything is wrong! Where’s the catch, Fatass? I will not believe for a single minute that you’re doing it for inclusion of minorities.

c: …Well, okay. I guess… I guess it is time for you to learn this.

k: Learn what? What are you talking about, Cartman?

c: Have you ever heard the word “queerbaiting”, Kyle?

k: Uh… no. What’s that?

c: Let me start with another question. Who do you think is the most popular character in Racoon and Friends?

k: Um-m-m… I don’t know, probably you?

c: Wrong! It’s not me, Kahl. And wipe that smirk off your face, ‘cause it’s not you either.

k: Then who?

c: Super Craig.

k: What? This can’t be… You’re the main character, he can’t be more popular than you or me! It makes no sense!

c: That’s what I thought! When I first saw the character popularity rank I started thinking… Where was my mistake? How is it possible for a side character like Super Craig to be more popular than me and you? Is it his character design? His backstory? His role in the plot? I was seeking for answers for hours until I finally realised…

k: Realised what? Come on, stop wasting my time!

c: Patience, Kyle, patience. It’s the most important trait for a superhero. So, let me continue. The main reason of popularity when it comes to Netflix… The reason why everyone loves Super Craig so much… The gayness, Kyle.

k: …Huh?

c: That’s right, you heard it correctly. The gayness. Homosexual orientation immediately makes a male character more attractive to fans.

k: …That’s stupid.

c: No, Kahl! There can be no mistake! I looked through the popularity rate of Freedom Pals and guess who the most favorite is there?

k: No way…

c: Yes way, Kahl! It’s fucking Wonder Tweek! The one with the most lousy backstory I’ve ever seen! The fans are completely in love with his cute little dramatic breakup with his boyfriend. Can you imagine it?!

k: Wow… That’s…

c: I understand how shocked you are now, but that’s not the end. Then I’ve heard the term “queerbaiting” and that is so goddamn genius, man, you’ll just love it! It’s when two dudes, who are not directly said to be homosexuals, show some gay hints here and there.

k: So?..

c: Don’t you get it, Kyle? It’s just hints! You don’t have to *actually* be gay, the fans will just fill the blanks themselves! It saves a lot of troubles with homophobes and laws in foreign countries, but you can still make money on gay jokes! That’s sweet, dude!

k: Wait, and do you expect people to actually buy it?

c: …Who are the most popular rivals in DC?

k: Batman and Joker?

c: Who are the most popular characters themselves?

k: …Batman and Joker. Dude… what the fuck?…

c: See? Told you!

k: So you want us to be gay so we become the most liked ones?

c: Yes, if you put it simple.

k: That’s… kind of messed up.

c: Oh my god, we won’t be *really* gay. Just… hints or something.

k: O-okay… Just to be clear: there won’t be any weird moments we have to actually take part in, will there?

c: What do you mean?

k: Like… um… I don’t know, some too-gay shit like holding hands or really kissing?

c: I will hope so. Believe me, Kahl, I like it no more than you do.

k: Well… Are you sure they’ll all like it?

c: Totally!

k: Oh, god, I feel like there is some kind of a trap, but…

c: Think about money, Kyle. The large, unthinkable pile of money and fame for just small scenes with some remotely gay-ish dialogues. That thought must calm your little jewish soul.

k: …Just so you know, I still fucking hate you. And I’m doing it only because I don’t think it’s right for a side character to be more popular than the main ones.

c: Whatever makes you sleep at night, Kyle. Whatever makes you sleep at night…

okay while we’re on the subject: cartman’s skills for languages are goddamn amazing like?? the boy is about ten years old and yet he knows german and a bit of spanish (i think?) that kinda amazes me.

so here’s a headcanon that cartman has improved his knowledge of german over the years and by high school he could speak fluently without any difficulties. he mostly did so ‘cause he had to know one foreign language for school studies, but the major part of choosing particularly german was (obviously) to tease and make fun of kyle since eric’s an absolute bastard. he was constantly mocking kyle while talking in german and watching kyle getting all pissed off. he didn’t really say anything mean – sometimes he was even making compliments taking the advantage of kyle not understanding the language, but how would kyle know that? he was sick of it and he absolutely hated the way cartman acted.

so in the summer before their senior year kyle came up with a devious plan starting to learn german by himself. it wasn’t really difficult even considering that kyle is much worse at learning languages than cartman is. he did have quite a success but he kept it a secret from everyone but stan. he studied hard cheered up by the thought of cartman’s future expression when he realises he doesn’t have this advantage anymore. and oh boy was it worth it.

after three months of daily studying they finally go back to school. kyle chooses german as an extra class – the one where cartman is – and prepares for the moment he has been waiting for so long.

it doesn’t take cartman long that day to come up to kyle and say to him something in foreign language. kyle gets pissed off immediately but then calms down realising with surprise that all that cartman said to him was “looking good, jew. i like how you look in school uniform” in german. with a nasty laugh and an arrogant smirk – to make it believable that he insults kyle, probably – but he was actually telling him quite nice things all day long thinking that kyle doesn’t understand a single word. that shocked kyle beyond belief but he wasn’t sure of how to react so he just kept fighting with cartman telling him to knock it off.

then the time for extra classes came, and kyle waited for the very last second until the bell rang to enter the class with the self-satisfaction on his face (‘cause he’s a dramatic and secretly a bit theatrical jerk).

cartman choked on air seeing kyle entering the classroom casually and taking his seat right in front of cartman without even dignifying eric with a single glance. cartman got completely lost for a few seconds and then laughed loudly shouting about “the jews who are not allowed to learn german ‘cause it’s fucking comical”. nobody really paid attention to him having got used to his antisemitic and gross comments. the teacher shushed him, and the lesson continued as usual. kyle was answering the teacher’s questions without troubles. meanwhile cartman was so stunned he couldn’t even concentrate properly and kept mumbling something unintelligible.

he tried to make a scene and fight with kyle for invading his safe “jewfree” place, but kyle just gave him a cheeky grin. “afraid i might get better at this than you are, cartman? oh, and thanks for what you’ve said earlier. i would’ve never thought you think this shirt makes my amazing green eyes look even deeper” leaving eric completely speechless.

bonus: sheila got completely crazy and hysterical over the fact of her son learning exactly german, but he explained it by his desire to break stupid stereotypes and prejudices about jews, so she was pretty satisfied and proud of him. he didn’t tell her he started it just ‘cause he wanted to anger cartman though.

another bonus: they both know spanish pretty well, so sometimes they get into arguments switching languages from english to german to spanish. stan and kenny just stand by and watch them fighting being slightly impressed by this scene. btw butters knows spanish too, but when he tries to cut in their conversation they just shout at him “shut up, butters” in unison in spanish so he apologises and steps back.

kyman high school au where cartman who has never really cared about his grades finally realises that kyle is kinda obsessed with being the best student and there is nothing that can piss him off more than being bested by someone like cartman. so eric basically just for fun decides to become a perfect student and since he has some kind of natural talent for studying and he’s a quick learner he pretty soon catches up with kyle so they start competing constantly.

and although kyle is a hardworking student, cartman is still perfect at cheating and convincing teachers of his “new” era of being an example student so their competition becomes rather brutal. and i mean it. the history classes are their battlefield where they debate with each other arguing constantly about some historical facts and theories for the whole lesson. and although cartman often makes controversial statements just to irritate kyle, he’s a better and more confident debater due to being an unashamed and charismatic asshole.

when their classmates are afraid of the test or something they beg eric to start a nerdy fight about something (sometimes he even gets paid for doing so).

also kyle kinda sucks at artistic subjects like arts or music or theatre while cartman is great at them (he’s very confident about music and acting which was proven in series multiple times). he often brags about being more imaginative than kyle is. in response kyle laughs at cartman’s constant C’s and B’s in biology/chemistry/geography.

so basically they both end up being called nerds but the only thing that matters to them is being better than each other. competitive & obsessed with each other smartasses :D

kyman high school au where cartman who has never really cared about his grades finally realises that kyle is kinda obsessed with being the best student and there is nothing that can piss him off more than being bested by someone like cartman. so eric basically just for fun decides to become a perfect student and since he has some kind of natural talent for studying and he’s a quick learner he pretty soon catches up with kyle so they start competing constantly.

and although kyle is a hardworking student, cartman is still perfect at cheating and convincing teachers of his “new” era of being an example student so their competition becomes rather brutal. and i mean it. the history classes are their battlefield where they debate with each other arguing constantly about some historical facts and theories for the whole lesson. and although cartman often makes controversial statements just to irritate kyle, he’s a better and more confident debater due to being an unashamed and charismatic asshole.

when their classmates are afraid of the test or something they beg eric to start a nerdy fight about something (sometimes he even gets paid for doing so).

also kyle kinda sucks at artistic subjects like arts or music or theatre while cartman is great at them (he’s very confident about music and acting which was proven in series multiple times). he often brags about being more imaginative than kyle is. in response kyle laughs at cartman’s constant C’s and B’s in biology/chemistry/geography.

so basically they both end up being called nerds but the only thing that matters to them is being better than each other. competitive & obsessed with each other smartasses :D

i love how kyman and candy are basically almost the same ship i mean

(s10e3 // s12e9)

shout out to sp fandom cuz i really think we underestimate how terribly wasted heidi turner’s potential is. i mean. the girl literally dated eric cartman i can’t believe matt&tray really just ignored possible funny scenes about their post-breakup lives?? like?? it’s such a big field for jokes and plots?? her losing weight or her and cartman being passively aggressive to each other every time they have to talk?? or her being hated by the rest of the girls in the class? i’m not talking anout making her a major character, but just one episode about her future after that one arc in s21 would be really nice :( it’s so sad for me to see how she’s absolutely forgotten by everyone

also i strongly headcanon heidi as a lesbian who realised her orientation after ending her relationship with cartman and just IMAGINE how shocked he’d be when he realised the only girl who actually liked him turned out to be a lesbian after dating him. that’s freaking hilarious

damn we really need more episodes about girls cuz they’re always absolutely wonderful like am i really the only one who LOVES s23e7 (the girls board club part!!!!!) or s17e10? doubt it