It Turns Out That A Lot Of People Don't Like To Read Because They Were Never Properly Taught How, And

Some ancient, eldritch, pissed-off god: "Fuck this one place in particular!"

if you read in a frog paper “specimen was released in the field immediately after capture” chances are very good that what it actually means is

“i dropped the damn frog and despite the fact that we fell all over each other no one could recapture it”

In case you are wondering why they are so eager to get Kavanaugh confirmed as soon as possible...

Why is Smallpox not on that list?

Based on personal experience, I have to call bullshit. I have never seen a full professor with a lab/office that tidy. (Personally, I try to keep my classroom as close to a college professor's as I can. Just so my students can be prepared.)

{6-27-22}

Studying entomology lately. Of course, I had to include the professor’s old lab. Hope everyone is having a productive summer 🤍

Absolutely true.

We don’t understand the power of our jaws until we try to break an m&ms with our fingers.

Note from an older person: we fucked up. I apologize. Please unfuck the world, for your own sake.

In public education, student "Permanent Records" are referred to as "Cumulative Files", or cum files for short (pronounced 'kyoom').

I-

thank you twitter, this is the only recommended topic post I’ll accept

I was discussing high school proms with a friend, and he said guys wants one of two things in a prom date:

1. A slut who will blow you both going to the prom and coming back.

Or

2. Jennifer Connely in the dance scene from "Labyrinth".

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My wife and I are big fans of Labyrinth and David Bowie. For her birthday a few years ago I got her this:

Labyrinth As The World Falls Down

My wife and I have chosen not to have children. We have virtually no experience with babies of any sort. Yesterday, we found an abandoned week-old kitten behind our back fence. It's been less than 24 hours and we are already offering her money if she will go back to sleep.