Latest Posts by gcldenhecrts - Page 2

RUDY PANKOW as JJ MAYBANK in OUTER BANKS SEASON 3 (2023)

me at work

“He can just barely growl. Bound so tightly with tension and anger, he approaches the state of rigor mortis.“ – David Lynch, The Angriest Dog in the World | 5/31

“Pour water over each wound. What about the wound inside me, the wound I was born into? Where do I pour when I am the wound? I am what wounds me.”

— Sanna Wani, from “Princess Mononoke (1997)”, My Grief, the Sun

—Chris Mc Geown

Sanober Khan, A Thousand Flamingos

song of the day :)

I DONT CARE ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *throws up and dies from caring*

[  Rudy pankow.  Cis male.  He / him .  subplot  6 .  ]  welcome  back  to  montclair  university,  Daniel ‘Danny’ turner  !  according  to  your  student  file  you're  a  TWENTY TWO  year  old  JUNIOR,  studying  SOCIAL WORK,  and  funny  enough  you  were  voted  most likely to go off the rails  your  senior  year  of  high  school  back  home  in  CONNECTICUT ( moved from the UK at age 14 ) .  i  can  totally  see  it  with  your  fiercely loyal,  dependable  and  self   destructive  personality  !  but  enough  about  that  —  i  heard  you  were  lizzie  harrington's  SOUNDING BOARD.  makes  sense  when  you  take  into  consideration  your  status  as  a  scholarship  student…  and  the  fact  that  you're  hiding  [redacted]  you're  often  seen  at  the prism,  and  you  kind  of  embody  power ranger bandaids over bruised knuckles, misplaced anger, a blinding loyalty that’s sure to get you killed …  not  to  mention  people  always  seem  to  hum  boys will be bugs  by  cavetown  when  you're  around,  but  you'll  always  be  known  on  campus  as  THE  SPARK  who  enjoys  soccer, rugby, running  and  has  12.3k    instagram  followers…  good  luck  this  semester  !  [  charlotte.  26.  She/her.  GMT.  ]

full name — Daniel Alexander Turner nickname(s) — Danny, Danny boy, Dan. name meaning — god is my judge age — twenty two date of birth — april 1st place of birth — hackney, london, england current location — connecticut gender — cis-male pronouns — he/him sexual orientation — homosexual height - 5'11 religion - agnostic family - Douglas ( father ), Kathrine ( mother ), joshua, caleb, poppy, beau, max, mila ( siblings )

medical diagnosis’ — adhd, depression, ptsd, anxiety, oppositional defiance disorder

voiceclaim — danny dyer

Inspired by : James Cook ( Skins ), Mickey Maguire ( shamless ), Neil Sutherland ( the inbetweeners ), Nathan Young ( misfits ), alex karev ( greys anatomy )

Tw for abuse, substance misuse, violence, addiction, overdose.

Danny is the second born of several children that Douglas and Katherine Turner forced into the world. From the moment Danny was born, the odds were stacked against him.

He grew up in a two bedroom housing estate in Hackney, East London. His childhood, to those on the outside, was nothing exceedingly special - he and his siblings attended a state school on the verge of closure, and when not there, danny was often at the youth club kicking a ball around, or running wild around the estate with older peers. Nobody bothered to scratch the surface or question why the young boy never seemed keen to go home - it was always easier to ignore the signs.

Douglas and Katherine did not parent well. They barely existed well. Douglas was an angry man with drug abuse issues and Katherine was so beaten down over the years she could barely get out of bed unless to get a bottle of vino. Douglas was violent within the walls of their home, and his anger did not end with the children.

The first time social services visited the home, Danny was four nearing five. He had recently started school, and some of the things he had said had raised alarm bells. Social came, they inspected the home and chatted with Josh, Danny, Caleb and Poppy. When they left, Danny was told by his father that if he ever opened his gob again, if social ever came back they would probably take him away from his siblings and they would never see each other again. that terrified him into compacency. They were on the radar, but not of high concern. You see, Social work is an underpaid and overworked profession, and the amount of cases coming in meant priorities had to be made. Danny sees that now, but he didn't at the time.

Every day was a battlefield, and Dannys way of coping was to lash out at anyone around him: a scream for help that everybody seemed to turn a blind eye too. Those turner kids are trouble, they are.

- Coming into teenage hood, Danny grew angry at his situation and the cards dealt to him. He had always struggled in school, but now his behaviour was unmanageable. It was like his body was constantly in fight or flight mode. ‘Defensive, Lazy, Unmotivated - a teachers nightmare’ - all words scrawled across his report cards over the years. they don’t care, Danny had realised. They don’t want to listen to my screams for help. nobody fucking cares.

But maybe someone did - because rumours started going around the estate about social services being on their ass again. It was that week that the family immigrated to the states ' too much fucking trouble over 'ere' Douglas had mumbled.

It would have been obvious, to anybody who stepped back and looked at the entire unit, that Danny had a magnitude of odds stacked against him. Some days all he needed was a fucking win. Somebody to turn around and say that they saw him. Nobody did, and especially not now, in a new country and different, bigger school.

Back in England, Danny had established himself. He went to the local primary school that fed into the local secondary. He knew everyone and everyone knew him. He was popular - because despite the anger and anxiety bubbling under the surfice, Danny was personable. All he ever sought was human connection, and although he was defiant towards adults and both desperate and reluctant for their help, he was great with his peers. He was the star of the football team, he was funny. He was always getting into trouble. He was a big fish in a small pond. Now he was a small fish in the fucking ocean

Back in England, Danny knew he was a failure at academics, he had been pegged that way before he had even gotten a chance to learn to read. But now it seemed he would also fail socially. He was a fourteen year old boy with a thick british accent, raging hormones and a very dry sense of humour that didn't land as well it conneticuit. Nobody really wanted to get to know him, not in that first year at least.

Douglas only grew angrier with age and the aggression only got worse as his kids grew stronger and started to fight back. Stupid sack of shit - you’ll never win against him.

Danny knew he would never win. He knew by teenagehood that it was futile to try. He spent his time pleading with his mother to do something. If she couldn’t protect them, he would. Josh had grown useless in his own years (according to Danny). While Danny only felt anger, josh’s way of coping was to retreat. Coward - why don’t you grow a better fucking coping mechanism !! When he turned 16, Josh left and never came home.

aside from the obvious, there was another undetected reason for Danny's piss poor school performance. He couldn’t read - not well at least. He had managed to skirt by this issue for the majority of his life. He used the teachers own diastase of him to hide the embarrassment. He spoke in jibberish with a shit eating grin when asked to read aloud, made sexual innuendos when questioned about board work and kicked off or doodled on school tests. Fuck it, if they didn’t care, why should he?. 

Until one teacher did. One teacher who didn't know about his history back home. One teacher who didn't see a write off, but rather a boy who needed a chance. He kept him back one afternoon and asked Danny to read a passage from the assigned text to him. Danny did the usual - pout and moan and roll his eyes and demand to be let go for lunch. This interaction repeated itself again and again. after years of screaming to be seen by adults, he suddenly wanted to be left alone again.

this teacher didn’t leave him alone. In fact, he invested in Danny. He encouraged him to take up drumming, and payed for his lessons (unbeknownst to Danny, who assumed it was free), he tutored him after school and once building up some trust he took Danny for an eye test one afternoon. It transpired that not only could Danny not read well, he couldn’t see very well either. The opticians where shocked at how he had been going about day to day tasks with one blind eye and the other with intense short sightedness. It seems that at some point in his childhood the nerve in his right eye became detached - possibly from a KNOCK TO THE HEAD - and the sight went completely.  (not that he will wear the stupid glasses. Fuck that).

it turns out, Danny wasn't as stupid as he was always told he was. Yeah, he lacked a lot of common sense, but he had potentially academically. It took him a few years, but with he started to find his footing again. First academically, than socially. He was still the angry, feral kid he had always been - but he was also kind. He had a strong sense of justice, and a blinding loyalty that often saw him throwing punches. His favourite thing was still sports, he spent hours on the school fields after class kicking a ball around and was placed on nearly every school sports team.

Going to college was never something Danny saw being on the cards for him, but when the idea of floated by the teacher who had taken him under his wing, he wasn't totally opposed to it. SOCIAL WORK, that was what he had always considered. He had been let down by the system, and Danny didn't want that to happen to anyone else. He worked hard to get the grades, and his sporting ability landed him a scholarship. He was the first turner to ever to go to college, a badge he wore with both pride and shame. He picked a local college, and he still goes home almost every day.

Danny mental health began to rapidly deteriorate after his 20th birthday. Without the security and structure of a classroom, he found himself on the verge of breaking point. He tried to push through, tried to continue as he always had, but something had shifted. He drowned himself in drugs and alcohol as a way to numb his busy mind. It all came to a head on the night of his 21st, however, when he overdosed. The school was supportive, but firm with their drug policy. He was forced to go to therapy twice a week, and assigned a case worker that he could contact at any point ' should he start to fall apart again '

WANTED CONNECTIONS

- Exes / hookups / fwb

- a love interest !!! Intense and messy bc danny doesn’t believe he’s worth anything, let alone someone taking the time to want to know him!! Someone maybe with calculated anger (rather than danny misguided and chaotic) who almost uses danny as their morality chain and vice versa!!

- best friends

- friends 

- older brother / parental figures 

Enemies: It’s well known this boy likes to throw a punch or two - if you’re lucky it could be you!

today's mood, 06/09/2022.

ANTI-HERO (2022) dir. Taylor Swift

Zendaya as Rue Bennett Euphoria S2 | Jan 9

RUE & LEXI in

EUPHORIA | S02E03: Ruminations: Big and Little Bullys