Commander "Thunder Thighs" Cody Is Known And Loved, But Consider, For Extra Bonus Points - Captain Rex

Fellas I have committed an oopsie

I in my ignorance assumed

That the train on the right platform at the right time would be the right train

Wrong!

I got on board sat down for a nap and now I am in Oxford?????

a silmkinkmeme prompt:

Silmarillion Kinkmeme prompt by Anonymous: Adar/Elrond - First Time Enjoying Sex is Dubcon. (RoP, Explicit, M/M, creator chose not to use archive warnings, no particular DNW for Elrond’s past relationships.) Elrond’s only ever been with lovers who are at best selfish and at worst abusive. Every time he’s had sex, it’s been painful. He had nothing to compare it to, he assumes this is just how it was supposed to be. When Adar takes him prisoner and makes it clear sex will earn Elrond better treatment, Elrond expects it to be even worse than he’s used to. But Adar treats him gently and makes it physically pleasurable. (Bonus if Elrond says something that makes Adar realise all this and Adar is disturbed. Because he knows he’s not a good person, and he knows that it’s wrong to use Elrond’s position to coerce him into sex… so wtf is wrong with the elves for treating Elrond worse than the Lord Father of the Uruks?)

I really like this one, which is bizarre because I. haven't gotten round to actually. watching? RoP? Like I've read To Partake (x) and a handful of Adarond fics but in general I have absolutely no idea what I'm taking about. I'm not sure anything I write will turn out like anon wanted because I'm basically an illiterate three year old waving around someone else's action figures but I'm guaranteed to have a great time so let's do it.

As with all things, let's start with tequila orange juice and gratuitous world building, and we'll see where we end up!

Lemme do some quick googling

Daddy issues this daddy issues that - bro my dad's fuckin awesome what's up with yours???

People are giving Lucilla in Gladiator 2 so much shit like yeah she's giving bitchy overworked divorced deputy headteacher but have you considered that I'm into that

Obi-Wan Kenobi's net worth at the height of the clone wars - 52,365,000 credits. yeah... that's a lot.

general. my good sir. obi wan. why do you smoulder so hard these are mug shots

can you control yourself for like 20 seconds this is serious you are a war criminal

the house of fingolfin as bizarre t shirts

tag yourself im well paint me green and call me a pickle

Note for fingon's shirt: article 7 sections 553-4 of the maryland annotated code prohibited sodomy, oral sex and “any other unnatural or perverted sexual practice with any other person” - aka anything fun.

im sorry but i only heard "There once was an elf from tirion Who slew many elves in sirion" as the start of a limerick???

There once was an elf from Tirion Who slew many elves in Sirion; Seeing who died, In grief, he cried: "Curse those damn rocks - we're sick of 'em!"

there once was an elf from tirion who slew many elves in sirion

Y'all the worldbuilding is getting intense rn, I'm having so many thoughts, because Elrond is a mosaic of dozens of different people, so many facets and multitudes, and different people see different things in him. People see his starry grey eyes and dark hair and hear his Voice and think of Lúthien, think of Maglor. They see his braids and attribute it to Turgon’s preference for traditional styles rather than that well-known Fëanorian obsession. His gracious courtly manners are from Melian or Idril, though clearly taught by Maedhros, who learned from Finwë. His skills and wisdom and bearing are clearly passed down from any or all of the 20+ different kings, queens, lords and princesses he is associated with. He dances like Lúthien and Idril. He is as courageous as Fingon and Beren and Eärendil, as fierce in battle as Fingolfin and Maedhros and, Eru forbid, Fëanor. He speaks archaic Quenya, just like the Gondolindrim, if only one ignores the Fëanorian accent. His giggle is Elwing’s, birdlike and odd; his laugh is rich and merry like Finwë’s; that half-despairing chuckle is Beren’s; the endearingly awkward titter is Finarfin’s; the exhilarated whoop is Fingon’s; the manic mid-battle cackle is Fëanor through and through. He fights left-handed like Eärendil and Maedhros, plays the harp right-handed like Fingon and Finrod and Maglor; he can write with either hand, producing a spindly scrawl with his left (so like Maedhros, so like Elwing) and authoritative calligraphy with his right (so like Fëanor, so like Thingol). His eyes are the chasm of the heavens - he gets that from Melian - but did Maeglin not also inherit his piercing gaze from Aredhel? He has his father’s jaw and his mother’s hair, or was it Turgon’’s jaw and Finwë’s hair, or maybe those angular bones came from fair Nimloth and the little flick of a curl at his temple from Beren. In certain lights he’s the spitting image of Thingol - or was it Fingolfin? The tilt of his wrist is as bird-like and fragile as Dior’s, as graceful and deliberate as Idril’s. His cheeks dimple when he smiles, just like Fingon, and his eyes crease when his face softens with fondness, just like Tuor, who looks little like Haleth but in moments like this. When he’s concentrating, the furrow of his brow is Thingol’s and the lip between his teeth is Beren’s, who took after Bëor. That eyebrow raise brings to mind 15 different people, all of them dead. One may look at Elrond and see a lost loved one in his profile, until the light shifts just slightly and he becomes the one who killed them, before he turns his head just so and suddenly looks like a complete stranger. Elrond is a Silmaril of ghosts, each facet a memory, love and terror and awe and joy and grief reflected and refracted upon one another again and again, radiant, hypnotic, infinite.

The house of Feanor family tree feat. bizarre t shirts

tag yourself I'm notice me sin pi