Frightbunny - Sophie Claire

Dude last night I had this dream we were fucking. I saw the back of your neck all bare and it was like I fell forward lips first onto it. Thin gold chain, spring clasp, I ripped it off with my teeth. I heard you choke for a second until it broke but you knew I wouldn't hurt you.

And in the dream we are in your bed, in your old room, the one you shared with that emo boy-girl who didn't want you having anyone over ever, in that so silent space of broken eye contact and listening, listening. A space can't last if you know you have to leave it right, so here I am writing about some pathetic dream I had about some thing I said I would forget. Maybe some other night I would write about softness or upturned lips but no this is all water now

super low quality meme. valerie come back we need you more than ever </3

Hi im Sophie I like silver jewelry quiet eyes and soft hair. Hot wax and mad cats and a good saxophone solo, I like friends who love me and I like to love; I like to be alone. Empty bathrooms a safe crowd a 1950s fire escape just out of Manhattan from where I can see the stars. I like a rickety thing, unsafe sex, breaking a searching gaze. I like a stranger, a stranger in a big city, a boring kind of stranger to whom things don’t happen; and I like playing a part, a person to whom nothing happens, nothing at all.

Excerpt from 'I might say something stupid'

This summer was spent hotboxing my closet and eating mangoes on the living room couch. I forgot things as soon as people said them. 

Nothing bad has ever happened. Not to me then and not to me now. I scrub at the wine stain on my jersey. I love open bar events. 

I spent two weeks as a camp counselor even though looking at children makes me feel sick to my stomach. In each one I see myself and wonder how anyone ever hurt me. 

sohelpmegod.substack.com

I might say something stupid

Brat summer, or innate goodness and suicidal tendencies summer

On being weak

Rainy days, everyone is equal. Everyone's pant cuffs soaked, smokers under awnings. We're all missing somebody else.

I basked in idleness like a dog in light. I saved myself.

Things healed and plants grew and if I die here or not litters will still be born. I could be born with them.

I don't think it would be hard to love you

my hair's been falling out in chunks

i only dream about my job

School's started

I drink at least one iced matcha latte with oatmilk a day

I'm in love with my teacher

either way by odie leigh // jeff buckley // normal people by sally rooney // unknown, possibly natalie diaz // eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (2004) // old friend by mitski // halloween by phoebe bridgers // unknown // unknown

I wanna go to a friend's friend's friend's show & get fucked by her afterwards

I want to be alone in a crowded room

i wanna do something that's not allowed

All this expectation is a knife!!

Getting worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better and worse and better

I recreate situations in the Sims 4 to feel some grasp of control over them