9TH MARCH DIARY + BOOK REVIEW

applying for jobas

what happens when you apply for a job in teyvat!

includes: hu tao, xiangling, rosaria, albedo

masterlist here.

hu tao

"good evening, kid! what are you doing here?" "i'm here to apply for a job." "ohh, great! we have been so understaffed lately, it's just me and zhongli, everyone else who sees corpses everyday can't stand it!" "haha. i also see corpses everyday, so i will be fine. my whole family is dead." "oh, sorry. anyways, wear our uniform! here, 20 bucks please."

"um.. no. not before i see the salary." "sorry! err... it's $300000 mora a month." "what? are you for real? what a deal!"

hu tao smirked. after all, they only give staff such a high salary because they overprice their funerals. people who think zhongli is poor because he works here are so dumb! someone like him will not ever accept a paycheck.

xiangling

walking to wanmin restaurant, you wanted to talk to chef mao but accidentally read the wanmin restaurant poster instead.

"chef mao, i'm here to be an apprentice." "sorry kid, we don't accept any staff. me and my daughter is enough. and we certainly don't want some stranger to ruin our recipes." "by 'recipe' you mean a fucking slime secretions sandwich? hell naw ywou do your thing. i'll work for the liuli pavilion."

"fine by me. we don't need you," chef mao says.

when he said that, a girl's head popped out from under the counter.

"dadd!!! we are in need of kitchen help. if she will ruin our recipes, we can still let her cut and prepare the ingredients! you won't need to wake up at 4 every morning to shave potatoes again..." "i suppose you're right," he sighed. "welcome aboard. but before that, how fast can you cut a carrot?" "like a normal person. i'm slow, but practice makes perfect, right.."

"yes it does. now please, cut up this chicken into cubes. our popcorn chicken is very popular."

rosaria

"you? work in church? why are you even asking me? when i go to church i don't even sing with my sisters."

"well you were standing outside the church like you wanted to go inside so i thought you were a nun hiring people."

"no, i wanted to go inside because it was burning hot outside. and i was waiting for the nuns to finish singing about bartabatos." "who is that?" "you want to become a nun and don't know who that is? oh gods."

albedo

i'm truly scared of that stone faced alchemist. but i've graduated from sumeru academy, so he can't not accept me right? although i did not pass with flying colours. albedo is always wandering around collecting birds in cages and turning them into geovishaps.. how scary. but alchemy is the only thing i'm good at, and i need a job! here goes..

"hey. i'm someone who likes alchemy. wanna hire me?" "only if you're better than timaeus and won't push this green haired girl and awaken a giant dead ice flower." "umm.. surely not. that seems impossible." "well, it sure isn't. i've experienced it." "i would be surprised if you haven't. you talk about it like it's real."

"turn this boar into a lamb please, it's a test."

after a few hours, you made the boar look like a lamb. "good job. i can surely do things faster than that, but hey, at least you're better than timaeus. all he does is stand near the alchemy table and interrupt people when they want to craft something."

"i feel you... and people." you say.

oh albedo!🧎🛐🙏💯🥵😇🥰

busy

nsfw!!! albedo x f!reader

cockwarming, blowjob, needy!reader, uninterested!albedo

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“I’m busy,” Albedo tells you for about the sixth time in the past ten minutes, and your shoulders drop in dissatisfaction. “I’ll take care of you after I finish my research.”

You huff in response because you know he won’t be finished anytime soon. He would stay hunched up in this room forever if he could - and he tries to.

He’d probably be able to if it weren’t for you, his pretty angel who would come bother him for even a sliver of attention. Whether it be just to sit beside him in comfortable silence or to ask him about what he was researching, you were always there with him. You were surprised he wasn’t sick of you by now.

Unbeknownst to you, he adored it - adored you. Loved when you would come to visit him even if it pulled him away from his work, filling the otherwise quiet room with your sweet voice while you leaned your cheek onto his shoulder.

Today, though, you were pestering him a little extra. Heat simmered under your skin and its been so long since he’s touched you and he hasn’t made any move to do so. So you took it upon yourself to get what you wanted.

What you wanted translated into you asking to suck him off while he worked.

“I’ll stop bothering if you let me.” You promise - a lie but he didn’t have to know that - gently trying to push him so you could move in front of him. “I’ll be good, Bedo, please.”

He pauses, letting out a light sigh before sliding himself and his chair backwards to make a space for you.

You beam at him, eagerly crawling and squeezing yourself into the space under the table and between his legs. He watches you intently while you so excitedly kneel below him before reaching out and pushing your hair back and out of your face.

That was the only time he touched you, leaving you to do as you wished while he did whatever he was up to before.

It’s a shame he was so set on research instead of watching you. You looked so pretty with his cock in your mouth, doing your best to fit him all the way down your throat. Hands splayed out on each of his thighs and your eyes blinked back tears while you tried to accommodate his girth.

You were so messy, too, saliva and precum on your chin - Albedo likes it wet, likes you looking a mess.

The way he didn’t react - besides a few heavy breaths and a small ‘fuck’ that spurred you to take him deeper - made you feel hot and more desperate for him, squirming in your spot between his legs. This wasn’t enough for you, not when you know you could be getting fucked right over the table he was sitting at.

Pulling off him and gasping for air, spit stringing from the tip of his cock to your mouth. Your jaw was sore from it being kept wide open for so long and your throat burned.

“Bedo,” a small, raspy whimper.

A small noise of acknowledgment from him, “hm?”

“C’n I please-“

“I thought you said you would stop bothering me after this?” You wiggled your hips again, whining and wrapping your lips around the wet head of his cock.

“I’ll never get anything done if you keep pestering me like this.”

His hand grabs your jaw, pulling your mouth away from his dick and making you peer up at him. He admires you for a short while, thumb swiping along your slick bottom lip, to which you open in hopes he’ll let you suck on it.

He doesn’t, opting instead to lean back a little more, patting his thigh like he was calling a dog to come to him. Your face burns at that but you don’t pass the opportunity to sit on his lap, crawling up and situating yourself atop him.

You can feel his dick against you, pressing against your cunt, twitching under you at the feel of your wetness. You thank god that he’s so lenient with you, letting you act out your desires with nothing more than amused scolding.

With hands on shoulders, you lift yourself just enough so he can slip himself inside. He hooks his own chin over your shoulder, seemingly drawing his attention back to his work once again.

“That’s better?” He asks whilst writing, but its rhetorical. The way you immediately start rolling your hips tells him all he need, a high chant of “yesyesyes” spilling from you.

A try at making a rhythm was lost quickly, head too cloudy to do more than little desperate jerks of your hips.

Doing all the work was tiring, with Albedo not even shifting his hips to aid you, just letting you pathetically twitch and grind and whimper like a bitch in heat - he’d tell you that, if he was more vulgar, but doesn’t. He’s sure you already know, anyway.

Even though he was quite good at blocking things out, the wet suction and squeeze of your walls around him were a little much, and he had to stop his work to take a breath and calm himself a little.

It unfortunately didn’t do much, the never stopping movements from you becoming something that he couldn’t just ignore.

So he decided on a different course of action.

“You’re distracting me,” he murmurs, grasping you hip with one of his hands, to which they kick forwards. “Stop moving.”

You shake your head, a silent protest at his notion. How mean could he be to make you stop?

A pinch to your side and a simple “what did i say?” were enough to make you think twice.

You let out something akin to a sob, hips shaking as an attempt to keep them still. It was somehow too much and not enough at the same time and it made you want to cry, made you want to tell Albedo how mean he was being right now.

He’s so stubborn sometimes, so set on working and blocking out the rest of the world that even when he wants something he wont get it. You, tearful and pouting, shove your face in the junction of his neck and shoulders and try your hardest to just sit.

“Good girl,” a praise - he knew you were pouting - to keep you from being too upset.

“Just a little while longer, alright?”

⛷️🐝d Toilet fun!

(random scenarios i have in my head as someone with a bad imagination)

"Shall we ditch this juicy block of steak to head over to the urinals for some due fun?" he indicated to the signboard in front of your table indicating two genders separated by a line, shimmering pale grey eyes blinking in mischief.

Relax, he meant to make you follow him as company for his trip to the loo, nothing more. How could anyone mistake his boyish maroon curls for a dirty scheming jerk? The ruffled tangles he own probably came from innocent ruffles from his aunt in their frustratingly functional, happy household.

"No," you tease, then breaking into a hysterical laugh as if you just cracked the most hilarious joke known to man. Toothy grin in place, you swished your wine red gown to trail behind you as you rose from your puffy seat.

As he walked away from the table, he walked with one calloused hand outstretched behind him, welcoming aura made obvious. He didn't even have to look back to make sure your mountain-scaling-hard hands were placed in his. You observed the way his midnight blue suit sleeve stretched richly over his lean forearm and took his hand in glee.

Upon reaching the entrance, he spun you to a stop, your braided chignon unfurling into dark, untamed waves upon your bare neck before he took a ravenous glance at your pouting lips and you admired his perfectly inclined foxy eyes obviously oblivious to your admiration. Your lip quivered at his perusal, as if every thought of his was your command.

Looking at the checkered toilet floor, you broke the electrifying eye-makeout that left you stumbling mentally and dragged the top piece of your dress with both hands down to disguise your discomfort. In letting go of the satin piece that stuck to your flesh like a desperate crush, you cursed at it for making you feel itchy and hot.

He flashed you a tooth in his large smile and leaned his head toward the stall to indicate his departure. You relaxed and drooped to rest your back on the smooth pink-painted wall adorned with abstract paintings you find meaningless. Who would put in effort to decipher this heap of strokes drawn in succession with no thought put into it, if they already had a life full of meaning and hope?

Musing in your sneaker clad feet sure makes time pass fast... or maybe Nic was just the fortunate owner of an efficient sphincter muscle. Striding out of the half open wooden door without a sound, he splashed water onto your countenance from a water reserve in his palms and screaming, "BOO!" while horror dawns on your unsuspecting wide black eyes.

After getting you in the state of shock, his impossibly light eyes arched entertainingly upwards and eyed you mischievously as he quickly stretched his arms forward to pull you down with him as he fell backwards.

Everything happened in slow-motion, as all highly anticipated moments in your life do –

Expecting a fall from your unexpectedly less than restricting retro dress, your normally unreactive brows furrowed in anticipation, narrowing your long-lashed eyes in response. The whole world turned quickly like a rogue panorama with romantic chandeliers all over - until your vision was filled with him and only him.

You've always noticed his eyes were an electrifyingly rare shad of grey almost close to raw egg white, but also so baby blue they were angelically pure. Once the two of you were bouldering a really steep course, and Nic was about to fall, his fingers loosening its grip on the handhold. When you saw his helpless puppy dog eyes definitely not suiting his foxy demeanor drooping in a watery pool, you couldn't help but felt forced to reach out a hand to pull him by the neck like a baby pup.

You weren't exceptionally strong to begin with, definitely not strong enough for men bigger than you, and never strong enough for Nic, who was larger than life. If he drifted away, you wouldn't even have the strength to pull him back into your life. Holding Nic by his sweaty neck plagued by wild maroon curls extending downwards, you lasted for 3 seconds before you slipped down the course onto a soft gymnastics mat next to an out-of-breath Nic.

Hair luminescent like light shining on fresh blood, you held eye contact with him and found that he smiled back, head tilted to his left and cheeks extended enough to show you his light dimple. You never held eye contact with people other than your family for long, and you never knew people appreciated it. What on earth were you missing out on?

Pondering the long history of viewing into his eyes did you no good as he spun you 180° over like a ballroom dancer and you were on top of him as he stayed cornered into the wall, head tipped back in defiance, daring you to exceed his expectations. He definitely wouldn't have thought you'd be admiring his kissably visible jawline. At this point you were still standing straight, until you weren't. As if every moment was escalating into your wildest fantasies, he closed the distance between your bodies by reining in your waist, generating a thundering, warm shiver in you. Nevertheless, you arched your neck back so you wouldn't have to kiss him. He was made for admiring, not indulgence.

"It's okay, you know me," he purred softly, sounding like a dangerous whisper in your ear despite the distance between your faces. "Not like this," you murmured and looked down to his messed up collar, his priceless necklace creating depth in the endlessly contoured desert that is his collarbone. "Look at me," he chided, sharp eyes knifing into your betrayingly flattered skin. Out of all people, he has eyes on me. Isn't that so... exclusive? "Remember when you held me by the neck before we fell together?" his eyes explored your relenting nose tipped high upon your face, and you could feel his eyes pecking secret kisses onto the bridge of your nose.

Your lips widened in protest, and he held your nape gently as you pulled his collar close to your body. Smiling your endless black hole eyes at his candy reddened lips, you indulge in the feeling of his fingers caressing the curve of your head in a secure clutch, your chest pressed against a new, foreign surface.

That day, you almost relented and put your head in his shoulder. You could feel his curls welcoming you if you rolled to his side. The thing is, you've never been brave when it came to love.

Now, you could explore all you wanted. Because this was real. His head dipping down to infuse your lips with his cinnamon flavour was real, and he tasted better than your bad imagination. The way his sharp nose was crashing into yours was real, and you've never wanted to feel better. You are living in the better. "I wanted this," you spoke your illegal thoughts through your busy mouth, and he drew his head back to look at your characteristically shadowed face. The shadows suited you well. You could tell from his hungry gaze.

Putting his comforting palm on your cheek, you felt the cold of his ruby ring and it led you to seek warmth in exploring the shadowed lines of his jaw. A mystery. "I've wanted this since the day I laid my eyes on you," he declared discreetly, voice ravenous and eyes wild.

19TH APRIL 2022

a very great day~~!!! woke up, drank chocolate milk for breakfast (like 100ml...) and one slice of bleached bread, one slice of unbleached expired Massimo!

for lunch, i ate at a taiwanese restaurant in kota damansara, it's on the second floor!! very tasty sia! presentation also very good.

photo: [ blob:https://web.whatsapp.com/d025adf1-81d1-4977-8327-b427f49e8778 ]

dessert: [ blob:https://web.whatsapp.com/7f9a0a57-3a76-4a0f-b173-48750af5b4c1 ]

i realise how much i want to go to taiwan again. my mom jokes about going to tokyo disneyland because she wants to have fun, as a teacher everyday is stressful. started catching up on blue lock again.

unsaid parts of the day: me scrolling through instagram and texting my friends, learning about my shadow self and analyzing my parents and friends' birth chart.

for dinner we went to a place that had steamed soup as it's signature dish but ordered no soup. (we ordered sweet sour pork, lala, stir fried yao mak (BEST IN MY OPINION))

photo: [ blob:https://web.whatsapp.com/c43ed55a-3188-46a7-90e9-d389c4e40c77 ] WE DIDN'T EXPECT IT TO BE RM63 😭💔

after we headed home in low spirits we walked around our neighbourhood with cat treats after parking our car. after a while a kitten ran like 99km/hr to our direction and meowed so many times! she's like another version of our old cat..

it had: very light gray ears, grey tail, (the tail is very animated..)

it likes humans a lot whenevr it sees someone new it runs in their direction. it ran to our neighbour so we went home and stared at it in our car porch lolol! then we heard it come back and look around so desperately.. crying. like it actually cried!! "meow... meow..." WE COULDN'T STAND IT so we went back.

when it was almost finished eating it's supposed dad came... it's the cat that pees in our porch. it knows how to sniff!! the kitten just ignores the food if it can't see it clearly. it smells the road intently, like a metal detector!!! whenever it lowers its head to smell the cat treats the kitten scratches him!! like, where is the filial piety!??!!? the dad doesn't care, it just continues sniffing like nothing happened.

"ma, is it the kitten's dad? they have the same colours." "probably. if they weren't related the dad would've slapped him!" (it sounded funnier in chinese)

DIARY:

14th of March 2022

--

i woke up from a dream that i was in kinokuniya and checking out an official sketch of asuka from the animators of evangelion for rm169 after looking at a really thick art book. IT WAS HEAVEN!! i recall not wanting to wake up bc of how heavenly jt was and because i thought about waking up, i actually woke up. DANG!!"#!#!

i sat in the living room for so long and only went out to eat at 12. i got jean first thing in the morning (12am), on her birthday!!!! i "broke down" because i didn't know whether to eat at my favourite western restaurant or at mcdonalds. we were going to stop by my M grandmother's house for lunch again so i can't order anything too lavish but i also wanted to eat in the restaurant!!! i can't eat anything non luxurious in there... my parents made the decision for me.😇

set meal: garlic bread and mushroom soup, fillet o fish in sour oil (for me), two scoops of ice cream (vanilla n chocolate chip).

oh my dar. was my grandmother's dishes tasty! garlic prawn (it was so good the flesh tasted salty and springy even without its shell), yaumak, broccoli and carrots, fried chicken, sweet and sour chicken...

we sat in her house for so long because it was raining dog and cat😒😒😒. i wanted to go back so bad but i couldn't. i mostly read and surfed the internet there. (and watched two episodes of sasaki and miyano...)

when i came back to my P grandparents' house i immediately dashed toward my laptop bc i downloaded valorant this afternoon. i waited for my dad and mom to finish showering while playing a practice match. i suck at this game, never playing again.

dinner was ok i really liked the potatos and rice! while it was raining the mama cat was letting her kitten snug into her tummy for a few hours. its so darn cute!!

after dinner i spent all my time relentlessly scrolling through shopee in hopes of finding good sanrio gifts for my friend whose birthday passed two days ago. until now. its 23:04!!! and i think I've found it.

Diary of 6 March 2022

i was dreaming of some vacation at the sea but it felt stressful. then i got teleported to my grandma's house and a pigeon flew in. so i woke up! i immediately went to check my phone.. haha....

i banned myself from scrolling in the morning and went to read my book. after a while i ate 3 cookies and went in the car with my parents! they are bringing me to Kepong to eat vietnamese food located in a shoplot under a condo~

OMG! it's not open yet.... so we went to a hawker stall we gushed over before finding a parking spot near the vietnamese restaurant. we actually planned to eat there next time since we already wanted to eat at the vietnamese restaurant. it's fate i guess!

i was probably getting weird stares from wearing pjs. its a graphic shirt of a thai god. it's very pretty!! and black PE pants...?? anyway we found a seat really quickly~!!

i ordered black pepper pork stomach soup with rice while my mom and dad ordered porridge and char kuey teow respectively. mine arrived first!! IT WAS RM9. and the soup and all was in a medium sized claypot. IT WAS FULL WITH SOUP AND MEAT????? AND... he gave me a lot of rice too. RM9!??!?!?! 2 AMERICAN DOLLARS!!! Wow.. hehe. what a deal!

when waiting for the food to come my dad called a char siew pau vendor in Pudu, KL to reserve 10 steamed buns for him because the vendor is super popular.. if he doesn't call he'll be too late!

waiting for my dad to come back, i could either daydream or read a book as i didn't bring my phone so i decided to take pictures of strangers posing for instagram photos in the street. my mom deleted them. they went to pet cats under a motorcycle after.

after my dad returned, we promised to buy 2 bottles of soy milk for our aunt and her daughters living near us. BUT I WANTED TO PEE! and her house is far from kl. everytime we're on our way to her house i always burst a kidney aye!

the store my dad wanted to buy soy milk from was a truck next to a shopping complex so you could say i was lucky! we passed by a coding/engineering class on the way. I SAW A KID MAKE A 3D MODEL (on Blender?)!! i want to do it too but i'm afraid of giving up halfway.

after i pissed my dad and i went to buy sengkuang (Jícama), soy milk and shaving cream. my dad passed by AEON and bought jicama, grapes and two cucumbers! when waiting for the soy milk outside he went to caring pharmacy in the shoplots in front of the exit of the mall. i waited outside in the 38 celsius weather... #RIP

we returned to the car where my mom was waiting in after he bought the cream and milk. then we sent the milk to our aunt and went home. it gets boring. after i finish reading my novel, start a new novel and play video games only do i shower. it's 5pm. what a stinky baby!

if you're curious:

BOOK I FINISHED: Aftercare Instructions by bonnie pipkins / ★★★★☆

BOOK STARTED: big game by stuart gibbs ☆☆☆☆☆?

my parents went out to takeout vegan petai fried rice and pepper udon. it was neat? idk the spice burned my ulcer... (◡﹏◡)

my mom commented on how oily the kitchen utensils were so my dad washed them for me today! love ya... he told me he washed the two cups i was scared to wash this afternoon because of an alleged bee who invaded our kitchen!!?/

A/N: i got yae miko on my alt because i had an impulse to roll. i shouldve waited for ayaka goddamn t=it. TIT?

diary of 11 april 2022

today my dad got vegan sweet and sour pork and other things but i highlighted this because IT WAS SO DAMN GOOD!! sometimes its stale but today's was crunchy and tasty~~

i don't know why i have such an urge to appeal to the male gaze right now. its like im wishing someone would notice me, so i do things i wouldn't do if i was alone.

i really like my art right now (so good!) and i've noticed i draw a lot of baseball nowadays. (i haven't even held a softball). my best deskmate called me pretty hehehe. a few days ago i dropped my pen and my deskmate (stranger) help me pick it up and i forgot to thank her so now i'm feeling super guilty. in break i stared at her and smiled and she said "zmk!??!" with sussy expression it was so cute.

in math teacher asked us a question on expansion of linear equations and the dude she called first got it wrong (but only a bit, he got positive number when it was -7) and afterwards someone whispered the correct answer. teacher looked at the namelist again and called. . ME!!! i spoke the correct answer loud and crisp an clear but i don't think i impressed anybody to be honest it was a lvl2 question, just a level above the basics. and the answer was basically announced before i said it, but my voice made it seem like something new, i guess.

when pe started me and li ting planned to go to the loo together but teacher said only one of us could go at a time. i took the pass first (and a strip of toilet paper from her hahaha..) and walked to the toilet. i ran back after i was done. it was raining lightly but i felt greatly uncomfortable bc when she went to the toilet she gave me a basketball. the ball was wet like a cold orange.

we were moved to the foyer because of the rain. me and liyeen arm wrestled each other and after i won liting challenged me... she is so strpng!!!!! after that i did like 2 sit ups and li ting said i was cute. since the floor we arm wrestled on felt like bricks, my elbow felt really uncomfortable (i already had a blister beforehand). later liting and adrie received volleyballs for many rounds and me and liyeen just stared at them playing while gossiping.

the rest of an hour was boring. i was deciding between joining liting in receiving balls (😧) or continue talking to liyeen. i crave excitement and liyeen is serving but idk why at that time i wanted to join her so much. looking back, i think talking to her was best. "oi u staring at xxx ah" "heheh..." "ï thinking abt my pc1 crush" "actually xxx remind me of my std 6 crush" "wow,"

when the last bell rang we were forced to sit down in the foyer according to classroom and gender. i sat next to xxx... originally i was facing his side profile bc i was sitting sideways and it got awkward bc i was opening my legs so i turned the other way with the help of liting! she is so nice how is this possiblw!!!

i walked back home with my dad i don't know why i was so uncomfortable. i felt so worn out even though i didn't even exercise. for dinner my dad steamed brown rice and frozen siew mai.

essays

sometimes i feel like essays are meant to waste people's time for formalities'' sake, because they state and emphasize something that can be said in a single paragraph alone to the point of memorization.

imagine writing a thesis when you only have one point to make. of course, to fulfill the 30 pages criteria, you will keep starting new paragraphs with different examples in which the reader is already aware of.

i can't fault you for being able to drill your point in our heads, but that's only because i read your article 20 times over under the guise of 30 pages with adequate points.

And there will come a day when you suddenly go, oh. That’s why. That’s why it was worth living and sticking around. I understand.

And then the moment passes, and you might forget again. But that’s okay, because life is an abundance of such moments. They will come back <3

😫😫🙏

pretending he's not your s/o. [2]

A/n: here's part two to the original request + think of this as a early birthday present from me to you!! you can find part one here, enjoy! some of these took a different turn plot-wise, i hope that's alright <3

Summary: reader pretends that their lover is their friend, co-worker, etc.

Characters: Aether, Albedo, Bennett, Childe, Chongyun, Diluc, Kaeya, Kazuha, Razor, Scaramouche, Venti, Xiao, Xingqiu, Zhongli

Warnings: fluff, a tiny bit of angst, i feel like i'm missing someone-, gn reader for all!

Word count: 2.7k

Accepts (he's very calm, rational, and understands)

Albedo: he understands why, and he's fine with it. especially if your relationship is something no one knows about, it'll be easier calling him your lab partner and friend. you both probably don't often go on missions together due to the busy schedules you both have, BUT when you're together, you probably often don't refer to each other in a very lovey-dovey way. at least in public; you two are very discreet! so, calling albedo something other than the endearing pet names you have reserved for behind closed doors is wayyy easier than you originally thought. and he's a very understanding boyfriend, so he definitely wouldn't throw a fit about this at all!

Chongyun: popsicle boy more than understands. he almost accepts a little too easily... he's not hurt by this, because your reasoning is rational and makes sense. he just wants you safe, so if he has to be your friend on a mission that's fine. everything is alright with him unless you start claiming you don't him who he is. then, and only then, is he bothered. if you bring this up in conversation, he may try to offer other ways to approach this, because he's like 0.001 bothered, but other than that everything is fine! just don't go around saying you don't know him because that's a huge shot in the chest that soft boy over here is not prepared for.

Diluc: this man understands completely! when you approached him about a mission jean was planning to send you on, he was a little worried, especially after he learned how far you'd be traveling... but when you asked him to accompany you on the long journey, he was relieved. the only minor issue is that he couldn't go as your boyfriend, due to issues of either one of you being targeted. he would go as your friend, the very well-known wine tycoon. he's not as bothered as many may think. why would he be? this is just a simple mission! no one would hit on you while he's at your side, he didn't need to be known far and wide as your boyfriend for men and women to stay away. he knows you can 100% handle yourself, so momentarily being referred to as your friend is alright.

Kaeya: telling kaeya you were going to stop calling him your boyfriend and all the nicknames attached in public was a blow to his heart, but guess what, if you have a reasonable enough explanation he totally understands. you tell him it has to do with a certain someone from your past intruding once again, and they're very dangerous, so he gets it and doesn't prod any fruther. he'll agree and not make a big fuss about it, only after he's done making a complete fuss about it. despite agreeing to accept, he teasingly asks you why you haven't been calling him this or that in public, and it takes a slap to the back of his head for him to 'remember' why you're only calling him captain or friend. this man is as smooth as butter so he'd never let it slip you're dating in a million years! but, that doesn't mean he doesn't pretend to let the secret slip, just to see your reaction. he walks the fine line of accepting but almost spilling the beans because he likes to tease you. don't worry though, after he's had his fun with you, just know he'll actually stop and leave it alone. but behind closed doors, the teasing doesn't necessarily stop ;)

Kazuha: he is definitely someone who agrees to this immediately, a little fast you joked. but he understands. you're from inazuma as well so you more than understand why your relationship needs to be kept on the down-low. especially since someone very close to you and kazuha perished, leaving you both as targets. even before your friends' murder, your relationship was a secret. so now that you're both outside of inazuma, you're definitely a little scared to share your true relationship with kazuha. due to kazuha's involvement with the crux and finding people he trusts, he's much more comfortable sharing your relationship with the pirates. you, on the other hand, having spent much of your time in mondstadt after your friends' death, are a bit more... worried. if you admitted your involvement with kazuha, what would happen to him? would he be slain down? at least for a little while longer, you want to remain as friends on the outside, to the people who know you in mondstadt and the crux. and kazuha's not against it either, as long as you come to terms that everything is alright on your own, he's more than fine keeping everything a secret!

Zhongli: telling him you would like to be called less friendly and endearing nicknames while in public, wasn't as much as a blow to his heart as you thought it would be. because he understands, and he's probably done it more than a few times as well, to keep you protected of course; he wouldn't just tell anyone you're his significant other, and vice versa. but this week you were meeting with some pretty dangerous people, alongside ningguang and yanfei to discuss legal action when it comes to a few individuals accused of money laundering; obtaining mora through illegal actions. during this time, zhongli offered to help in any way he could, and removing romantic gestures was rather easy. no one asked about your relationship because of how inconspicuous you two were being. but don't get me wrong, when this all blows away, he's less than a liyuen nobleman to you, assisting this case.

Accepts (he may accept, but that doesn't mean he isn't bothered)

Aether: poor boy! he's so hurt. what do you mean you don't want to call him your boyfriend??? sure, being called just a friend is fine because he is that too, but he's also your boyfriend so :( but after some thorough explaining done by beidou, he starts to understand why you both can't waltz into inazuma while you complete your own task, and share your lovers. he's THE knight, the one many know of now and are possibly after. it's safer for you to play under the guise of friends, more preferably friends while in inazuma, especially since he's heard baal is a very very tough cookie. if he's anything like kazuha has shared with him, it's best you don't refer to him as your boyfriend, especially if you cross her. she'd easily been the root of all of kazuha's pain, loss, and suffering. he didn't want that for either of you... so, for now, you're strictly traveling as companions or friends.

Razor: he can come to terms with this because he'll follow just about any order you give him. he trusts you wholeheartedly, and it's your word above all! but, in the back of his mind, there are times he wonders why? why does he have to be your friend again? it just doesn't make sense! lisa has to explain a few times why, and each time he comes to terms with it again, but there are still those times when he questions it. do you not want to be his significant other? would you rather be with someone else? but don't worry! he'll get over those fears as long as you reassure him that this is just a front while on this mission. reassure him that although to the public your title is friends, you're much more than that. and after, he'll totally be at ease.

Xiao: when your life was being threatened due to your title of an adepti, he knew it was important for you to go into hiding, effectively immediately. and for your safety, he accepts this instantly, without questions asked. but when zhongli tells him it's better for you two to not see or speak to one another, he is a little bothered. especially when you told him he might as well forget you were together, at least for the time being; it was a little harsh but you wanted to get your point across!! like razor, there's this insecure feeling bubbling within him. he wonders if he's strong enough, worthy enough, to be your lover. it doesn't matter how many times you reassure him that once this all blows over, you two can be together again and express your love to one another publicly or not. until then, he'd wait. waiting was going to be the easy part, he's waited for you to finally be his for thousands of years. what's another thousand, is his thought process. but when some of the younger liyuen's, such as xingqiu and hutao come to him and wonder where his graceful lover is, he can't help but feel momentarily defeated as he tells them you two were never together, just fellow adepti, co-workers, if you will. overtime, he'll come to terms with it, but for now, it does bother him a bit more than he'd admit.

Accepts (he accidentally/not so accidentally lets it slip)

Childe: you're not affiliated with the fatui, so any other group is practically a rival to them. you can't tell your affiliated group who he is to you and vice versa. but he so badly wants to share the secret... childe, like kaeya, walks the thin line of keeping the secret but wanting to prioritize his teasing and corny jokes instead. he'd much rather joke and tease about the nature of your true relationship than ever keep it a secret, and that's pretty much known. only very few in the fatui know of his secret, one being scaramouche after prying the information out of childe one day, and the other being la signora. despite how often he fought with scaramouche, and la signora's annoyance to be affiliated with the both of them, they were his closest friends! so of course, he'd feel comfortable enough around them to joke, and in the process, let it slip that he was dating you. ahhh, it takes so much bribing of scaramouche to not snitch and rat him out to the tsaritsa, and a lot of pleading with la signora to leave you alone; she was more concerned with meeting you, to see if you were truly worthy of dating childe, and far too busy judging you. how they found out? well, he'd accidentally let the joke carry on for too long and shared a bit too much information. unlike kaeya, childe is less than smooth and doesn't know how to keep this specific secret for the LIFE of him, so it's very hard, and practically eating him alive. he's a good keeper of secrets, only in the beginning though. give or take a few months the secret will be out to the entirety of the fatui.

Bennett: ahh, benny... he's so clumsy, he's BOUND to let it accidentally slip during a mission. he understands you want to only call him your friend for the sake of the mission, and that doesn't mean he's not bothered by it, but it works! momentarily... when you're both fighting a large group of treasure hoarders, one of them taunts what his purpose is if he's so clumsy and can't even do one thing right, and benny takes that PERSONALLY. he KNOWS he's not supposed to let it slip, but at this moment, he can't help but scream, "I'm their boyfriend, that's who! and i'm a pretty awesome one if i do say so myself." and suddenly, everything between hammers to swords drops and the world falls silent for a minute. you immediately scold bennett when you return home, claim although his gesture was... sweet. it was definitely dangerous to say that. jean had strictly said personal relationships should be kept on the down-low, no matter strength or rank of those involved. and he feels so bad because once again he goofed up. he's so upset about it and doesn't let it go the whole journey home. just reassure him that it wasn't the biggest deal in your opinion, because in the end, you both kicked ass together.

Xingqiu: this boy strikes me as someone who is a blabbermouth, and i know for sure he'd either accidentally or not so accidentally let it slip that you're really together when you're not supposed to be. your parents would NEVER accept your relationship. one, because you're their child duh, they're your stereotypical overprotective parents, and two, xingqiu is well... xingqiu. in their book, he'd never be a good match for you, especially if you come from a stoic lineage. he's too much of a goofball for them to handle grrr. but when they were finally free and caught you and xingqiu together one evening running around liyue harbor, they were more than shocked to see their with a boy?! your more overprotective parent was seething with anger, you had never seen them so bothered until now. but don't worry (or so you thought), xingqiu always managed to talk himself out of sticky situations, and this time had to be no different! you've told your boyfriend a thousand and one times, that if he ever by chance ran into your parents, never EVER tell them you're dating. he was simply a friend in your little group of friends. WRONG. because it seems like the script you spent hours teaching him had been washed down the drain. he's too carefree, and he forgot completely who he was supposed to say he was smh. instead of introducing himself as your friend, he told your seething parents exactly who he was.

DON'T!!! (his pride is obliterated and feelings are extremely hurt)

Scaramouche: unless the mission is incredibly important and life-threatening on both ends, then you should have nor want no reason to call him a friend or just a co-worker. after all these years, after finally coming to terms and accepting how he feels about you, YOU'RE the one who wants to backtrack and turn the clocks? why? are you insane? let's just say scaramouche's pride is shattered. how DARE you tell him you decided your official title would be friends until everything with the traveler blew over. how dare you!!! he feels anger, humiliation, and rejection, and guess what? he loathes it all. he doesn't really care if you're both in danger, because he knows he's more than capable of keeping you both safe, and vice versa. he's with you for a reason. he loves you of course, but he also knows you can handle your own. he will flat out tell someone who he is to you, meanwhile mosey around what you are to him because he's embarrassed to admit his feelings bye. his response to you calling him just a friend is, "we're not just friends, you idiot. stop telling people that!" he'll either be really blunt or like i said, mosey around the matter as much as he can. all i'm going to say is, if you don't want to be lashed out at, DO NOT call him a friend or anything in that vein.

Venti: tsk tsk. as much of a strong front he puts up when it comes to this, this bard, in particular, is a clingy little bastard, and he just can't accept this at the end of the day. why? because, well why would he want to have you refer to him as a friend, or even worse, a stranger? i feel like he would despise flat-out rejection, and if you're trying to call him a friend or stranger due to a mission, well then, that's the biggest form of rejection in his book! venti shows how bothered he is by this as he complains and whines, and is nearly bowing at your feet to not go through with this. "please, y/n! don't break my little heart." yes, he's practically begging. never would you have thought an archon to be bowing at your feet... a literal GOD pleading for you not to break his heart. and as much as it breaks your own heart, you have to go through with this! a mission is a mission, and if this can keep venti safe, you're all for it. although, if your life is in danger then, of course, he'll allow it! but he's going to want to mosey around the fact for a while, and ignore that you're actually calling him a friend... but if you're just trying to protect him, he'll laugh it off, and say he can protect himself. he jokes that he'd much rather face death than ever call him a friend or stranger, AHH.

7.19.21, rayofsunas