Latest Posts by dragonboygobrrrrr - Page 14

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Loved this fic

Fic Rec Advent

For the first, we're doing Jason Take the Wheel by Miss_Lazy_Tuesday, genuinely one of the funniest things ever and I adore it so so much!

Be prepared for:

Crack

Some feels

Don't worry, there's crack to cover up the feels

Shenanigans

Explosions

[tumblr] holy shit it works

[tumblr]

WHO WAS GONNA TELL ME WE COULD DO THAT?????

[tumblr] WHY DO YOU JUST HAVE THIS FEATURE LAYING AROUND

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This is how this would happen, Jason especially

Tim accidently referring to the Joker as Dad but those who know about Joker Jr aren’t present and so everyone is left with the ‘realisation’ that Tim is the son of the biggest nightmare to their family.

It’s probably Jason and Steph, her there to bother Tim but Jason went to the manor for food and the two naturally started arguing. Maybe Jason tells Tim to stop costing on his case and prove a point be made against blonde, but Tim just offhandedly goes, “Later, I think my dad broke out of Arkham again but the guards aren’t doing anything. Maybe they’re in on it…”

The two present naturally look at each other with confusion and for the first time stop bickering to peak over his shoulder and see what his case is because, holy shit Tim had a villain for a dad and didn’t tell us? Only to see numerous photos of the Joker in his cell and many reports over the last week of how he’s been behaving and Jason…

Steph pushes the man out of the room when she sees his face go from frozen fear to anger, thinking it’s towards Tim and his secrecy and, while she totally gets that, now isn’t the time.

Though when they get into the Jason starts a rant about how Bruce and Dick should have told him that the monster had a child, even if that child wasn’t Tim! Jason protects kids! Did they think he’d hurt him just because of who his father is?

No!

If anything, he’d become the kids full time body guard to stop that mad man from making Tim into another version of himself!

The two naturally go to tell the others, pulling Damian, Cass and Duke into a mostly unused room and telling them what they discovered, all while Tim stays in the library working on his case.

Cass is beyond worried but also confused because he doesn’t seem to have any physical characteristics of the Joker or Harley, but maybe the mother is different? Perhaps it’s still Janet and either she had a fling with the Joker or something far worse, which makes the young girl enraged on the woman’s behalf.

Damian makes a comment about him killing Tim, not in a serious manner but more as an option, but Duke shuts it down, saying that having a villain for a parent doesn’t mean anything about who you will be. He points out those in the family of that nature and other heroes like Superboy.

When asked why they didn’t get Dick or Babs involved, Jason says they defiantly know and lied about it.

It’s only after another three hours of working that Tim catches himself referring to the Joker as dad and shuts his laptop, making his way to Bruce’s room to hide under the older man’s bed like he usually does when that happens, only to overhear what his siblings are saying.

Tim presses his ear against the door to hear better.

“If that maniac had a kid, surely he’d have told everyone he had an heir or something.” That’s Steph’s voice, filled with worry that only he and Cass could detect as she hides it under a whiney tone.

Jason is next to respond, “maybe he doesn’t know? I mean, did Tim ever even interacted with him before he became Robin?”

It doesn’t take much more than that for Tim to realise that he must have been talking aloud again or absently answered someone earlier and misspoke in front of them.

Panic fills him as he avoids telling Bruce when he gets bad, even if it’s just a small thing, because the older man will start of being a concerned parent then go into Batman mode and only just stop himself from putting Tim in the confinement cell. Sure Tim came up with the idea of the cell so he wouldn’t hurt anyone if his conditioning got too bad, but he’s learnt the signs. He’s not a mindless drone, he still knows who he is and doesn’t hear someone talking to him or anything like that.

He just… sometimes forgets the Joker hurt him.

It’s not Tim’s fault that memories of watching TV with him and Harley, tucked between them with a big bowl of ice cream felt better than most memories of his real parents.

But he knows it’s wrong, always comes back to calling the Joker his enemy.

Bruce just doesn’t get that.

Tim hears them talk a bit more, theories about who his mother might be, if Tim is safe at the manor, if Joker knows he has a son…

Opening the door, Tim stands there and stares at them as all eyes snap to him in alarm.

He doesn’t let anybody speak, cutting them all off quickly, “He’s not my dad. Go the cave and search for file number 26557933301-JJ and put in the code AGELAST, all caps.”

With that he turns and leaves, walking at first before running to Bruce’s room to hide.

He goes to family dinner and pretends not to notice the quietness or how Jason is still there, eating his food quietly and waiting for the ball to drop.

Naturally, Damian is the one to say what he wants first, “So why is okay that Tim shot the joker but I got in trouble for stabbing Bane?”

Everyone groans.

You’re a regular office worker born with the ability to “see” how dangerous a person is with a number scale of 1-10 above their heads. A toddler would be a 1, while a skilled soldier with a firearm may score a 7. Today, you notice the reserved new guy at the office measures a 10.

Heart wrenching... more writers should write Bruce like this, as a man who cares so so much, but can't show it as Batman, cuz if he shows weakness his villains will exploit it, they have before

Bruce is known for bottling up his emotions, shoving them aside in favor of the greater good, the work that needs to be done, getting rid of his own so he can deal with other peoples. But… emotions have to come out, they always do. And bruce knows that. And plans for it. And after Jason’s death… he shoves it all down, shoves it away, so he can focus on Dick, and Alfred, and Gotham, and Tim, who’s newly introduced into his life, and then… and then he shoves them all out of the house, for one day. Asks for one day. Gives Dick and Tim bonding time, forces Alfred to finally take a “sick day” and meet up with some old military buddies. But Tim forgets his phone, and heads back into the Manor to grab it, telling Dick to wait outside.

And he goes down to the cave, because thats where he left it last-

And stumbles upon bruce, kneeling on the floor in front of Jason’s memorial case, his old robin suit clutched in his hands. 

Tim almost speaks, almost goes closer, when Bruce tips back his head and screams, the sound so bone chilling and frightening- that Tim almost thinks for a moment hes been mind controlled or something- but it devolves into sobs, heart wrenching, horrible sobs, as he screams his hatred and sadness at the world, his wrath at his son being taken from him, his sorrow that it was so soon. 

Bruce wails in mourning, every pent up emotion from everything just exploding outward. 

Tim retreats back up the stairs and lies, tells Dick his phone was in his pocket the whole time.

the lego batman movie reads like it was written by jason and tim mocking bruce and dick, like you can’t tell me the batjokes isnt there to piss bruce off, courtesy of tim, or the whole scaly panties thing isn’t jason making fun of the robin uniform

@mbirnsings-71

Detective Comics Annual #3 - “Chaos Theory”

written by Brian Buccallato art by Werther Dell’Edera, Jorge Fornes, & Scott Hepburn

AU where bruce and co. (his entire hoarde of kids, even jason in disguise) are at a gala. And it's a really big gala, party of the year type of thing in Gotham, absolutely unmissable. And usually, even the rogues know that this night is off limits, so it's relatively safe. So, they're all at this gala, right?

And then the joker crashes it because he has no respect for Gotham traditions. Breaks in through a window, yada yada. He starts to go on this whole villain speech as per usual, and everyone is waiting for the heroes to come. But all the heroes are at the gala, in their civilian identities, with a thousand eyes on them. No one can reasonably slip away, except for maybe jason, who's already seething mad and ready to attack. But with the chaos and people trying to get away, all the exits are blocked, and his helmet is at home.

Bruce is at the front of the crowd, facing the Joker. Joker sees him and makes a comment about Jason, and goes on about how Bruce must've felt when his baby died. And then he brings up how he killed the little birdie too, just a few days before the terrorist attacks that allegedly killed Jason. And he mentions how much he tortured Robin before his death, and Bruce snaps.

He leaps forward, absolutely hammering the shit out of the joker. Beats him up so bad, no finesse or technique to it, just pure rage. His kids try to pull him off, to no avail. No one else even tries. By the end of it, by the time the police arrive, the joker is more blood than body, and Bruce has finally calmed down. Everyone is just staring at him in shock, understandably. (The joker ends up in hospital, paralysed and in a coma)

His kids all drag Bruce home and give him an entire lecture about his persona and how his cover has probably been blown. About excessive violence and how he refused to kill joker but then pulled this in public?? They're all worried about the fallout in the news the next day.

No one sleeps that night, for various reasons, but then when the newspaper comes out the next morning... there's just nothing bad written?? The headline is something about Bruce being a hero for saving everyone from the joker, but there's no other mention about Batman or anything else.

Turns out, no one in Gotham is surprised that Brucie Wayne, no 1 airhead, beat up the joker because "did you SEE him as a teenager?? We were all just glad when he came from his travels pretending to be stupid instead of picking fights with everyone. If anything, it's understandable that he snapped, I would too if a clown started bragging about killing my son." The only reason no one brought up his violent past is because they were worried he would revert back to that behaviour.

Jason’s Titan’s Tower Attack AU

Bruce: *gets the notification of an attack 2 hours too late because of Hood’s hacking*

Bruce: *rushes to the Titan’s Tower, scared that Tim’s dead*

Bruce: *runs into the Tower’s living room and shouts with a breaking voice*

Bruce: Robin? ROBIN?! Where are you?!

Tim: *excitedly dashes into the room with a plate of cookies*

Tim: Look, B! We made cookies! Try them!

Bruce: *confused af, tries one*

Bruce: They… taste like Jason’s…

Bruce: *ready to burst into tears*

Tim: That’s because we made them together. Duh!

Jason: *waltzes in without helmet or mask but in full gear*

Jason: Well, Baby Bird, that’s it for today. Next bird sitting session will cost ya, old man!

Jason: *zetas away with a cheeky smirk*

Tim: Bruce, can I have another playdate with Jay?

Bruce: *Bruce.exe stopped working*

Dinah, who somehow got roped into being the batfam counselor: And why did no one explain to Jason that the Joker was nearly killed twice by the two people he originally called family and only third party interference stopped him from permanently dying, not only giving the young man closure but also opening a line of communication???

Bruce and Dick trying very hard not to look at a bewildered Jason: It just never came up.

Why am I not surprised

oh so we're doing scooby doo crimes now

Love this idea

Perhaps they ought not to have eaten the dragon. There had been people objecting to it at the time. Surely such meat was poisonous. Perhaps it was even an affront, an insult to some intangible order of nature they ought to honour.

But the city was starving, the siege had gone on too long, and the king's troops were still a week's march away. The scorched earth would be fertile again in time, but right now it was barren. Right now there were mouths to feed. So they changed their crossbows for butcher knives and got to work.

None of the royal commanders asked any questions that could not be answered. After all, their aid had come shamefully late. The dragon's horned skull made a noble gift, a fitting tribute from a triumphant city to its humbled king. Who would have thought to question them?

And none of the townsfolk spoke up, when the first golden-eyed babes were born. Children who grew up barefoot and fearless, clambering over the city's patched and rebuilt roofs like they had no notion of falling, with a strange glitter to their skin when the sunlight hit it just so. No one breathed a word about dragons.

Because soon enough there were deft, young hands taking loaves straight out of the oven, heedlessly lifting iron from the forge, plunging into boiling laundry water. And some of them more wondrous still, wild, warm-skinned youths, with inexplicable knowledge and peculiar remedies.

A blessing, their families said proudly. A blessing after so much hardship. Which it was, in its way. This city would never fear dragon fire again.

My mom's bisexual, amazing woman

reblog if ur bi, ur not biphobic, or ur best friend is a beautiful valid bisexual

Arkham Knight: IF

I've been doing a lot of Ace Attorney reworking lately... I figured this gives me the perfect excuse to dive into a one-shot for Arkham Knight. One of my fav games, in spite of the criticisms against it. (人◕ω◕)

As a forewarning: this universe is set apart from comics and established game universe (despite there being some similarities in the game's lore). I'm not an avid comic reader, so it is not my intent to upset anyone. I'm merely presenting a possible universe based off information I learned through the Arkham games and any tidbits I pick up from elsewhere.

And if you're wondering why I'm skimming over Jason being saved? Or a retelling of Arkham Asylum? Well, a good buddy of mine wrote a couple fanfics on those events a long time ago. I don't feel like treading the same ground as him, and I'm skipping Arkham City because it's just the major catalyst of what I wish to really muse on. Maybe one day I'll circle back and muse on it, but for now I'll focus on Arkham Knight. (人◕ω◕)

But I'll give a brief rundown of the events that led up to this. Batman manages to save Jason from Joker after a few months. Tim Drake still joined on as Robin because Bruce needs backup out there and he was making too many careless mistakes because of his tireless, relentless search for Jason. Moreover, Barbara was shot by Joker during these few months, which is why she couldn't step up as Bruce's sidekick in Jason's absence.

When the second Boy Wonder is saved and brought back to Wayne Manor, things are... tense. Jason has to recover physically and mentally from Joker's brutal torture, and he doesn't take it very well that Tim stepped in as Robin. However, Tim steps aside gracefully to let Jason reclaim the mantle of Robin since it's so important to him. Not that Tim quits as a member of the Bat Family - he just transitions to the title of Cardinal (may become Red Robin at a later date; for now Tim's thinking of Jason's feelings). Jason... isn't completely satisfied with the pity shown to him, but he hashes things out with Bruce and establishes that he's still Robin, that he still has a home at Wayne Manor. Barbara, Tim, Alfred, Bruce, they all still care for Jason. (人◕ω◕)

Arkham Asylum progresses similarly to canon, just with Jason tagging along as Robin and wrestling through his hatred for Joker. Doesn't help that Joker knows he broke this Robin, and uses every opportunity to steal him back... But it never pans out. Joker is prevented from a Titan transformation at the end of the night - Jason snipes it out of Joker's hand before he can inject himself. Keeps the events on the island from being televized, at least. And also - Scarecrow still gets devoured by Croc to some extent. That doesn't change. Dr. Young is spared from dying... though she does have much to answer for in developing Titan... (人◕ω◕)

Arkham City as such progresses with a healthy Joker and a mentally spiraling Jason. (人◕ω◕);;; He's starting to feel that keeping these crooks alive isn't worth the pain if they're just going to bust out again and be terrible human beings. But right now it's Joker he's focused on... because he targeted Bruce (and himself) on Arkham, and the Clown's being given all this freedom in Arkham City... He's not happy.

Bruce tries to keep him out of the Arkham City fiasco, but he slips in with Tim when Cardinal brings Batman the line launcher. Jason not hooking up with Bruce does bring a wave of uneasiness, and it complicates the mission to bring down Arkham City. Bottom line? Batman and Oracle still stop Protocol 10 after it's initiated, but Jason kills Joker before Clayface kills Talia. Batman, Robin, and Talia then take Clayface down together... But after Bruce blows up the Lazarus Pit, there's the matter of Jason taking a life and having to own up to that to GCPD.

Ultimately, Jason is arrested and sent to prison, but the lawyers manage to argue it was in self-defense, which shaves off years of his sentence. Being too invested in Jason, Bruce is kept in the dark about his son's rehabilitative process; Alfred is allowed to know certain details, but for some reason Bruce is kept out of the loop. They tell him their hands are tied due to Jason being uncovered as a member of the Bat Family, but even Batman can't... get anything out of Gordon. It's clear that something is amiss, but Bruce doesn't press too hard, even as Batman confronting Gordon - Jim begs his old friend to trust him, and Bruce...grudgingly backs down. (人◕ω◕)

So already, we see some stark differences in this timeline: Joker never became terminal because of the Titan, so he didn't infect all those people (including Bruce) with his blood. This means no people to cure of Joker's blood. Which in turn means when Scarecrow makes his move against Gotham, Batman has no excuse to keep Tim away from events, as much as Bruce would like to tackle this all on his own because of his failure to keep Jason from crossing the blood red line. (人◕ω◕) Alfred, Barbara, and Tim can tell that Bruce's guilt is gnawing away at him, but they won't let him face this night alone. They're also aware of some things that Bruce will... likely react negatively to.

But when Scarecrow has so much of the criminal underworld collaborating on a scheme to kill Batman and ruin his reputation...? Well. They can't treat this night like any other. (人◕ω◕) Batman's going to war, so the Bat Family is joining him on this crusade. All of them. (人◕ω◕) And not just the Bat Family... Gordon, Cash, GCPD, and some new faces that will throw Bruce for a loop. Scarecrow is relying on Deathstroke to run a militia in the hopes of overwhelming Batman with gear, weapons, and sheer numbers. On this night more than any other, Bruce needs an army of his own. (人◕ω◕)

The first stretch of the night involves Batman tracking Scarecrow down and stopping his plans at Ace Chemical, turning the facility into a bomb to spread his toxin across the entire eastern coast of America. That goes about the same, with Deathstroke remotely piloting the helicopter to kill Batman while he's searching for hostages. And his militia move to occupy Gotham while Batman is busy with Ace Chemical.

But as he's wrapping up the mess at the factory, Bruce is cut off from Oracle abruptly and this alarms him - believing somehow Deathstroke got to her. He demands Tim go check on the situation, and focuses on shrinking the blast radius since it's too late to stop the factory from detonating. Bruce manages to apply the four canisters of the neutralizing agent, and then ride out of there in the Batmobile. Outside, he gets updates on the city's situation from Alfred, and contacted by Gordon. Feeling Barbara's life is at stake, Batman requests to meet up and confess everything.

... When he rendezvouses with Jim, Bruce is given his first major shock of the evening: The Commissioner already knows Barbara is working for him, and he further already knows who Batman is. Gordon didn't want to say anything until preparations were complete, and he assures Bruce that only the people Jim trusts with his life know Batman's identity. They've been preparing this past year, ever since the incident in Arkham City. Preparing for a threat too large for Batman to contain by himself. As it stands, they're not as ready as Jim would like to be... But the criminals of Gotham have made their move, and all they can do now is react accordingly.

It's revealed that for this past year, Jason has been training a small militia of his own under the strictest supervision by GCPD. Trained them in everything he knew about how Batman fights and passing on the techniques and, to some extent, the gear. And through his knowledge of the Bat Family, of his connections with Wayne Enterprises and Lucius Fox, GCPD has been rebuilding Arkham Island without the city's council (or anyone) being any the wiser. It's difficult to ask the people of Gotham to keep trusting in the police when they keep letting things spiral out of control; Arkham City wasn't completely on them, but the public only sees the disaster that happened there. It still falls on GCPD's shoulders to do... something, anything...!

Hence, they're trying things this way. The public appreciates Batman to some extent, so if they have a task force that can operate like him and cut down on crime in the city... It should help in tackling the gauntlet that Scarecrow has thrown down with this alliance of Gotham's underworld. Batman won't be alone out there, and they won't just be using the GCPD's holding cells until the nightmare is over, Arkham Island's reopened... for the most part (a year is hardly time to fix everything wrong on that island). They can worry about the courts and the public's reactions later. Right now? Barbara's stationed there with a few of Jason's most trusted men. He's been making great strides in his rehab, though that could also be attributed to the friendships he's made with the personnel they've brought in - former soldiers of all ranks and sizes. Soldiers that were abandoned by their countries and left with nowhere else to go. The numbers may not compete with Deathstroke's army, but it's something.

Though he's troubled with Jason leaking secrets to Gordon and GCPD, Bruce is nevertheless thankful they've tried to contain these endeavors to people they trust without question. It still complicates things with more people knowing who Batman is, but for now Bruce will trust in Gordon, Lucius, Alfred, and everyone who spun this into motion. They're really trying to help Batman... And only time will tell how Jason's "army" will pan out after tonight.

Focusing on the here and now, free of having to worry about Barbara, and only the concern of Tim and Jason acting on their own in the city, Bruce lets his allies handle Bleake Island and make that their stronghold. He turns to Miagani to tackle elements of Deathstroke's militia and confront the Penguin with Dick swinging in from Bludhaven to help share intel on North Refrigeration. Knowing better than to even try sending him away from Gotham, Bruce allows his oldest son to keep tracking trucks so that they can destroy all of Penguin's caches.

Shortly after losing track of Penguin, Batman follows up on a lead that brings him to Stagg's airships and Jason hooks up with him, bringing along a few of his men to fight off Deathstroke's militia. The two of them finally chat after a year's worth of silence. Jason reveals that he was the one to come up with the idea of forming a "Bat Army" after the snafu with Tyger operatives in Arkham City. He hated feeling so overwhelmed in Arkham City, wondered if they would really survive the ordeal. Jason knows that by all accounts he betrayed Bruce by killing Joker; but to this day he still doesn't regret putting the Clown in the dirt. Jason is doing his best to power through rehab, to understand the gravity of ending lives... It's just, the Joker was deeply personal to Jason. After suffering for months under that sadistic torture, after stewing in so much anger and hatred over what that Clown did to Barbara and what he could do to Bruce, to Alfred, to Tim, to Dick... Jason has no regrets about that kill. When Jim came to him with the idea of working together to help Batman, Jason gave in without question.

Because... even if he and Bruce don't see eye-to-eye on everything, Jason doesn't want him to die. He's still loyal to the Bat Family, and he's felt capable and useful training these guys. It's a rush to be the Commander for once, to plan and make contingencies... He's not just Bruce's "underling" anymore. Jason needs Bruce to understand they're working with him, not for him. ... And yes, Barbara helped him iron out these feelings of his. Those were her words, and he agreed 100%.

It's sobering to see his son so grown up, to see all his "sidekicks" acting independently and yet so cohesively. What they're doing is bold and reckless, but it's no different than what he's been doing for years as Batman. And perhaps it's for the best they're operating as a team - for all the weaknesses that come with more people knowing their secrets, it's made up by the fact they have a reliable network of people looking out for one another.

Bruce and Jason confront Scarecrow together... But Deathstroke extracts his boss with the Cloudburst and escape. Still, they take Stagg into custody and Jason has a few more men collect the defeated militia members left on the airships. While they work on a strategy to counter the Cloudburst (approaching Ivy for assistance), and a strategy to mount an assault on Founder's Island... Some threats are knocked out by their allies.

When Two-Face starts hitting banks, Tim personally handles that one with Barbara offering remote backup. Dick tracks another refrigeration truck and takes out another of Penguin's weapons caches. Before he proceeds to Founder's Island, Bruce is asked to help restrain Firefly, who's attacking the fire stations across the city; Jason makes sure the pyromaniac stays down after the first loss. Jason's men go about tracking the missing firefighters, and investigating Professor Pyg's murders. As for Riddler, Talia resurfaces and takes him down with her sister and her faction of the League of Shadows; they leave Nigma for GCPD to collect. This liberates Catwoman without a need for a massive scavenger hunt.

With all of this taken care of, Bruce moves onto Founder's with Jason and his men providing backup with APC's. Bruce eliminates the Cobra Tanks, and then they go about combing Founder's Island, taking out Deathstroke's militia meticulously and searching for the Cloudburst. It's a slog with so many criminals and militia working together, but it gets easier as the night progresses because of the minor threats getting chipped away at. The firefighter's are rescued by Jason's men, including the Chief; Professor Pyg is taken down by Tim; Dick tracks down the last few of Penguin's caches and brings him down personally; Azrael is confronted by Talia and Nyssa, and freed from his brainwashing; the Man-Bat is identified and administered a cure by Jason with Oracle's help; Blackfire and his cult are taken down by Tim and Dick collaborating...

It's a long night. Deathstroke still rides out in a tank and sets off the Cloudburst... Bruce works with Ivy to quell the threat after dealing with Deathstroke's tank, yet the assassin does slip away after suffering defeat. Ivy disperses the cloud left hanging over Gotham, and because of their quick reaction time to the main threat she's left close to death but ultimately saved and hospitalized. This leaves Bruce and allies to chase down Scarecrow and Deathstroke, who do everything in their remaining power to fight back. They rely on distractions that Harley, Hush, Killer Croc, Freeze, Mad Hatter, and Ra's create to take Jim hostage. The threats are all eventually incapacitated or convinced to leave Gotham... But Deathstroke mounts a final massive assault on GCPD with drones and tanks, and has a final clash with Jason, while Bruce goes after Scarecrow and Jim.

In the end, Scarecrow doesn't even come close to winning, even with holding Jim hostage. He gets a dose of his own medicine and is left a twitching, paranoid wreck as they haul him in at last. Batman's identity isn't unmasked publicly, so there's no need to enact the Knightfall Protocol. GCPD is tangled up in court proceedings with all the crooks they rounded up, but the new Arkham Island proves to be a decent enough prison to hold them all. The important part comes next - turning the prison into a proper rehab center, nipping all corruption in GCPD's ranks before it can become a problem again. Working more intimately with the Bat Family from now on... that seems doable. Especially with Jason's trained militia being the main guards for the foreseeable future. The fact that Ivy helped Gotham after all her years of hating it... Rehabilitation is possible. They just have to keep trying; hope for the best, and prepare for the worst.

It's a lot to adjust to moving forward... But Bruce isn't alone in his quest to protect Gotham. (人◕ω◕)

I made a batman Caramelldansen meme ... I wanted to draw more robins but i got tired because i animated these ones too much! I thought it would be cute to have like steph and cass on the table and babs in the chair =w= duke hopping around.. maybe some more bats >w< but uh this is what i ended up on XD maybe ill come back to it.

We've had a family/murder of crows visiting our garden for years now, and this season the chicks are soooo helpless! They just stand around expectantly with their mouths open as the mom crow eats. Which is what inspired this comic! :)

Stickers-socials-patreon!

It's always funny to me when people assume that Batman employed a child when said child was like 'let me out there or I will start going out myself and biting ankles'

Citizen or whtv: what the hell batman

Batman: (helpless shrugging) look it was either this(gestures to traffic light child) or he goes out alone and dies ok what choice did I have

If they were transformers what vehicle would they be

Dick: a clown car

Jason: a freight train

Tim: the Batmobile he embezzled

Damian: a horse-drawn carriage

Duke: a Mars rover

Cullen: a go-kart

Stephanie: a speedboat

Cassandra: a UFO

Barbara: a submarine

Harper: an 18-wheeler

Carrie: an ice cream truck

Kate: a bulldozer

Helena: a helicopter

Luke: a fighter jet

Bette: an ATV

Alfred: a coach bus

Selina: a limousine

Bruce: a suburban dad van

BONUS – the Joker: a Tesla cybertruck

The batkids do not have a mother to find items for them that they themselves cannot find, so they find the closest replacement at the moment

Bruce:… Tim why is Harley Quinn eating cinnamon rolls in our kitchen Tim: *typing on his phone* oh I couldn’t find my headphones Bruce:… what does that even mean ~ Bruce: *walks into living room*… hello Selina Selina: *watching cartoons with Jason’s head in her lap* oh hey baby! Bruce: w- why are you- not that I’m not happy to see you but why are you here? Selina: kitten needed help finding his helmet.  Jason: *lifts helmet* we found it Bruce:… *walks back out of the living room* ~ Bruce: *staring at Talia* Talia: Hello beloved.  Bruce: … wha- why- how??? Damian: forgive me father but I needed to find my favorite dagger for show and tell tomorrow Bruce:… first of all no- ~ Bruce: *walking into Dicks room* hey Ivy- wait Ivy: oh hey bats! Believe me I don’t want to be here either but baby robin needed help finding his old suit Dick: *lifting his discowing outfit* we found it Bruce:… Ivy I will fund all of your plant experiments if you swear to never find that thing again-

Jim Gordon meets ... Batman and Robin. The Dynamic Duo. The Best of the Best.

Batman & Robin: Year One (2024) #1 by Mark Waid and Chris Samnee

Tim Drake’s self preservation instincts do NOT kick in

cue everyone shuddering in distaste. Bruce was really lacking in the creativity department

edit: link to the fic

All the Batkids using Bruce's cape as a little hideyhole. 😭

It started with Dick in his Robin years as a way to convince Bruce to carry him to the Batmobile after patrols. As independent as he liked to be, he liked being carried by the taller man more.

It continued with Jason. He'd hide under the cape as a scare-tactic, jumping out at the right time and yelling a loud, "Halt!" It did nothing but make the goons give a little 'aww' and often go easier on the little bird.

After Jason's death, Tim rarely went under Bruce's cape. Robin wasn't his place, Batman's cape wasn't for him. Yet, Bruce would often usher him under, pretending Tim was Jason hiding from villains again. He couldn't deny the grieving man, nor the way his chest warmed.

Steph did it for fun. She thought the weight of it was perfect, and she'd often giggle as she clung to Bruce's leg, merging into the bulk of the man. Scaring Gordon was her favorite when she'd pop out of nowhere in the middle of a chat on a rooftop.

Damian kept the trend alive for the same reason Jason did: to scare people. Except, unlike Jason, Damian struck fear into the hearts of people as he jumped from his father's cape, wielding a sword and an untamed fury.

And sure, maybe the real reason all of them liked to hang out under Bruce's cape was because it was safe and warm and heavy, making them sleepy and comfortable, but they'd never admit it. They just liked being close to their dad.

Nyssa: The sister that makes Talia seem sane

Nyssa (an hour into her ranting): Cats and dogs will live together, babies will cry, towers will fall!

Talia: Nyssa.

Nyssa: The humans will consume each other, and the world bleeds—

Talia (sighing, annoyed): Nyssa.

Nyssa: Yes, it bleeds off the edge of this flat earth—

Talia: NYSSA!

Nyssa (irritated): Whaaat?

Talia: I’m not letting you babysit Damian, and not a damn thing you say will cause the apocalypse if I don’t!

Bruce (defending Talia): And the world isn’t flat. I can’t believe I’m on Talia’s side right now.

Talia: I’m surprised, too. Nyssa, stop talking about nonsense theories and leave!

Nyssa: Fools! Only fools believe the world is round. It’s flat! Hidden by a dome force field!

Talia (pointing to the door): Get out.

Nyssa (continuing): The snow giants keep it guarded!

Talia: Get your ass out before you poison my child's mind!

Talia grabbed her ranting sister by the hair and dragged her out of the room.

Nyssa (whining): Hemar, you never let me talk!

As the bickering sisters left, Bruce turned to Ra's, who silently sipped tea while observing the entire exchange. Damian sat nearby, busy coloring a picture he had just drawn, paying his crazy aunt no mind.

Bruce: Huh, Talia is—

Ra's: The saner of the two, yes. I cannot fathom where Nyssa got that level of insanity from.

Ra's suddenly broke into a wheezing fit that lasted ten seconds, a lingering side effect of the Lazarus Pit. Bruce instinctively pulled his son closer, ensuring he was protected.

Bruce (sarcastically): It’s a mystery, I’ll tell you that much.

*hemar is arabic for donkey*

mic check one two one two

my duolingo streak is almost to 365 days who cheered

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Tim: *scrolling through the batfamily tag*

Tim: Wrong.

Tim: Wrong.

Tim: Incomprehensibly wrong.

Tim: Wrong but harmless.

Tim: Nice style and color palette but I don't care about the Superbat ship.

Tim: Mildly entertaining liveblog update.

Tim: They whitewashed my sibling. :(

Tim: Good joke, reblog.

Tim: Wro— well that's my boyfriend so I will politely look away.

Tim: Fifteen posts in a row by an innocent Teen Titans RP blog that I don't have the heart to block.

Tim: Take I agree with but Jason was the OP and annoying about it.

Tim: Chapter twenty-eight of Duke's longfic WIP!

Tim: GOOD POST! Instafollowed.

Tim: Bot.

Tim: Technically correctly tagged but uses this acronym for something completely different.

Tim: Museum-worthy art piece by a sixteen-year-old from the Philippines.

Tim: Wrong.

Tim: Wrong but in a new and exciting way that provokes thought.

What would buzzfeed unsolved look like in the dcu?

“This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved, we’ll be discussing the mysterious case of Jason Todd.”

—

Keep reading

If the Marvel and DC universes came together, who would be friends with who and what would it be like?

Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark would have the most complicated dynamic. Iron Man and Batman have a longstanding frenemy-like feud over who’s the better tech hero, but the public lowkey ships the billionaires. In reality it’s more like Bruce bringing his kids and a plate of Alfred’s deviled eggs to the Stark family’s Sunday brunches and they complain about “kids these days” over mimosas. Pepper and Selina laugh at the men in their lives while Alfred and Rhodey just give each other knowing looks

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