I Am The Eldest Daughter, Which Is To Say That I Am A Sponge That Absorbs All The Trauma Of The Household.

I am the eldest daughter, which is to say that I am a sponge that absorbs all the trauma of the household. Life is spilt milk and I am a kitchen cloth burnt at the edges. I am falling apart at the corners, threads coming away, rips and ripples like I am torn and trembling in an ocean of nothingness. I am the eldest daughter, which is to say that I emphasize with everyone. The love of my life marries someone else, and I find myself hoping that he loves her the same. My brother wishes death upon me and I toss and turn in my sleep over the tears I saw in his eyes. Life is an accidental fire and I am water. I attempt to stop a tragedy I did not start, to go blindly into a catastrophe that I cannot halt. I am the eldest daughter, which is to say that I am silent in my needs. My father asks me what I'd like to eat and I say that I am not hungry. I will chew on my guilt and swallow my pride before I even think of asking for anything. I buy myself a sweet and nothing tastes as bitter as it. Life is a metaphor for debt and I am drowning in the desire to be as insignificant as possible. I demand nothing and nothing demands me.

More Posts from Anyalinvier and Others

1 year ago

So Sherlock deduced that Faith is suicidal because she’s walking around with a cane, no coat on, a gun, and no plan to get home. Which we are then, on camera, explicitly told parallels ASIP John Watson.

So he comes up with a reason to have Faith by his side so he can help her through her danger night.

Which is not at all dissimilar to having John tag along to angelo’s, go on a chase, and spark a joy for life again.

Sherlock knew. When he summoned John across London on that fateful first night “just to send a text”, it wasn’t because he was being a prat, he was trying to save John’s life.

4 months ago

"life doesn't end when-" life has ended a billion times for me, you guys just don't suffer like I suffer

1 year ago
14th doctor kissing donna's hand: 14th doctor places donna's hand over his hearts
14th doctor kisses the top of donna's head

#eternal sobbing

1 year ago

just realized that the reason I wanna be left alone in complete darkness and silence is because I grew up in a household where yelling and shouting and screaming and drowning in chaos was my world so now I need to shut the world out to be able to feel safe and heard

1 year ago

Right, considering the current state of corporate politics on this site, and that it seems that only those affected seem to be actively speaking on the matter, it is up to I, the only fucking cishet on tumblr, to drag this out to a wider audience.

Right, Considering The Current State Of Corporate Politics On This Site, And That It Seems That Only

REBLOG IF YOUR ACCOUNT IS A TRANSFEM SAFE SPACE.

We need to show these higher ups how much we truly value them.

1 year ago

toxic parents will traumatize you and act surprised when you act like you've been traumatized

2 weeks ago

I love personalization. I love stickers on water bottles and on laptops. I love shitty marker drawing on the toes of converse. I love hand embroidered doodles on jeans. I love posters on walls. I love knick knacks on shelves. I love jewelry with goofy charms. I love when people take things and make them theirs.

1 month ago

You can make Holmes and watson look like whatever you want. Anyone who says they have to be white/skinny/whatever is a loser. BUT. There is one super super important thing that you cannot ever change, which is that Watson has to be HOT. Doesn’t matter what he looks like as long as that man is a total dreamboat. If you make Holmes look cool and then make Watson a goofy looking dork, you are missing the point by a fucking mile. HOLMES is the goofy looking dork. Watson is the astonishingly handsome swoon-worthy hero in these stories and EVERYONE should have a crush on him.

1 year ago
The Last Of Us
The Last Of Us
The Last Of Us
The Last Of Us
The Last Of Us
The Last Of Us

The Last of Us

These are all my favorite scenes from the game, separate images are separate moments (which probably doesn’t make much sense if you haven’t played it), dialogues are slightly changed to fit their interaction better. Sherlock is Joel (who behaves must of the game like an ass until the moment he doesn’t) and John is Ellie (I love Ellie so fucking MUCH) 

THERE! I FINALLY SCRATCHED THAT ITCH.

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anyalinvier - xavier
xavier

"in incepto finis est" — any pronouns

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