Sometimes I Wonder If You Speak My Tongue, and Who Really Rubs Mine Right.

my veins are popping right out of my skin this flesh is burning up it's too much to keep the gears that grind everconnecting my mind from bursting and breaking down all the time

sinking in my cheeks one last time trying to scribble out some sort of rhyme

but this writer is only full of one liners trying to piece together a broken puzzle the static and the struggle back to the same hustle sitting in front of the same dusty mirrors looking for a deeper reflection a deeper connection

but all i can see looking back at me was your subjection and all the infection that suffocates my lungs with lies pouring out of my lips and eyes

but past rejection can't break this protection spell of current affection

as my mind begins to stretch and not shrink and i don't even think of collarbones covered in pink lines and i don't know how many times and how many seconds turned to months that i've waited to look into the mirror and see myself staring back

Feels

It’s hard knowing what to feel Because nothing ever seems real But this sinking feeling Held up by a thin string That’s roped around my neck so tight When all I want is to pack up and take flight Down South for the winter This cold is too bitter

I’d rather see myself in golden California Smoking a cigarette filled with marijuana But that’s what got me in this mess So it’s time to put this to the test Just don’t ask the price I paid I must live with my quiet rage With standards so low, my day was just made Saved a bee drowning in my drink I want to fly but all I do is sink You can’t sting my flesh You’re kind of pain would leave me feeling refreshed

To think where I’d be without love Even when I always think I’m not enough Things aren’t perfect, but you’ve put me in limbo It’s better than hell, better than suicide, so Where do we go from here? I’m spilling lines that aren’t ever clear.

Crooked Streets

When you question everything that runs through your head When you could pull an all-nighter, or maybe go to bed Sometimes life catches you by surprise Or you won’t survive the sunrise I’m flushed. I’m pumped. About to explode. Beating and busting out of my chest My heart screams and my hands ache Deciding how much more I'm willing to take These black and white feelings bruised me I've got shaky knees and a head rush I never thought I'd miss you so much I miss the feeling of grinding teeth While I grind the gears ever-connecting in my mind Who cares if I’m biting down all the time? Still bodies harbor these racing thoughts Chasing things I ought to not Too far from home, I was born to roam I was born to spill lines out on these shattered streets Where Hell and harmony finally meet

You should join our gang in the garden. Sacrifice your friends, we should be your only friends

Zodiac 2017 Resolutions!

send help: in need of more vinyl and more weed

Journal Entry #37

you know what i’ve realized? there’s so few things in this world that actually make sense to me. but music makes sense to me. that’s why it’s such an important part of my life. the rhythms, the beat, the pitch and tone, the lyrics. it just makes sense, and it completely captures me and envelops me in a pool of emotions.

another thing that really makes sense to me is mother nature. she really is a beautiful provider am i wrong? i know she fucks with us, but i mean, it’s kind of her right. i believe in darwinism and evolution. maybe not from monkeys (i mean i really don’t know) but as humans we’ve even evolved from what we once were by natural selection and i think that’s mother nature protecting herself sometimes. diseases, weather, etc. i mean there are some instances it might be humanity going fucking insane, too. but when she plays her hand, she’s trying to protect herself from the shit that we, as humans, are treating her like. the universe is so vast and we are blessed enough to have something this beautiful and we wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for the coincidence of us being alive right here right now at a place like this. it’s breathtaking, knees shaking, spirit breaking free kind of thing to actually stop and contemplate. it’s so humbling.

you severely underestimate my apathy - Wednesday Addams

Starlight

Sometimes the stars remind me How lonely I can really be With skies length greater Than arms reach to me But twinkle, twinkle starlight This lonely child of night Next time you're feeling dark Remember even the moon shines at night Crescent state of mind With silent lips of mine Let go of that fear, my dear It's time for you to shine