He Was Weak And Foolish Like His Father, So I Destroyed Him!

college sounds fun and all but i’d rather embark on my pokemon journey

how often on a daily basis do you wonder if you’re One Of Those Annoying People Who Cant Take A Hint and people only respond to you bc they feel obligated

he can’t say “help me”.

© jiyongseyo + like/reblog this post. ♡

We’re so bad at sex and then we wonder why women aren’t like, really aggressive about sex. We think it’s cause they don’t have as much desire as we do. That’s how stupid men are, that we think ‘they’re just weird, women are like fucked up in the head cause they don’t wanna just fuck all the time. If I was a women, I’d just fuck everybody. Why don’t they wanna fuck all the time? I do.’ Of course you do, cause when you fuck, you get to fuck a woman! When she fucks, she has to fuck a guy! Wildly different experiences. For a man, 100% of the time, it’s the greatest thing that ever happened in his entire life. For a woman, about 40% of the time, when she’s being fucked by a guy, she’s thinking ‘I’ll get over this in a week. It’s not the worst thing. I’m not gonna cry this time.’ “Another thing that proves how bad men are at sex is that after sex, you’re looking at two very different people. The man just wants to lay there, be cool and the woman wants to cuddle … ‘Why is she so NEEDY?’ She’s not needy you idiot, she’s horny, because you did nothing for her. YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. HER PUSSY IS ON FIRE BECAUSE IT’S GONE UNFUCKED COMPLETELY. Of course you’re fine, you climbed on and went ‘KFHGSKG’ and rolled off. And she’s on you because she’s like ‘WH-at SOMETHING ELSE HAS TO HAPPEN, THIS IS BULLSHIT!!’ If you fuck a woman well, she will LEAVE YOU ALONE. ‘Thanks a lot buddy, zzzzz.’

Oh, Louis CK, advocate for the female orgasm. (via light-thematch)

this is the best thing that ive ever read

(via strawberrymilkspitbubble)

:)

Crucial.

(via dayzea)

i’m just tired and sad and want to makeout with you

This mental illness is very odd. One day, waves are crashing against my skull sending it shaking, and the next, the sun is shining and everything is clear and calm.

I don’t know how to handle these high and lows. (via drinkt0forget)

1. Always have a water bottle in your car 2. Carry an extra lighter (even if you don’t smoke) 3. Get something new where you go to eat often, not just your usual. 4. Make a budget for yourself 5. But don’t forget to give yourself some play money and always round up on how much things cost so you have money left over 6. If you’re texting someone, but nervous to send it, just click the fucking send button. You typed that shit out for a reason. 7. Stay out late, but wake up early. You’ll be glad you had all of your day. 8. If something makes you laugh until your sides hurt, write it down in the notes in your phone, you’ll want to remember that later. 9. When you’re talking to someone, and you suddenly think of something you want to say, put up a finger and wait for them to finish talking. It’ll help you remember what you wanted to say, but you won’t interrupt them. 10. Go to plenty of concerts. Especially outdoor ones. Get drunk with your friends, but not sloppy drunk. Just drunk enough to scream your favorite songs and dance without feeling embarrassed. 12. Always keep a change of clothes in your car. Including a pair of shoes. You never know. 13. Keep at least $20 cash on you at all times. Gas is usually cheaper when you pay with cash, and not everywhere you go to eat splits checks. 14. It’s okay to be sad, but try not to forget about what makes you happy. 15. Coupons are always fantastic. 16. If you think something is cute, fucking wear it. Don’t worry about what everyone else thinks. You’ll look great, I promise. 17. Sex stores are fun, even if you just want a good laugh. 18. Plan out your days off with your friends, that way you aren’t stuck around asking the “I don’t know what do you wanna do” 19. Don’t forget to remind your friends how much they mean to you. 20. If someone gives you a compliment, smile and say thank you. They wouldn’t say it, if they didn’t mean it. 21. Drink plenty of water. Not only does it keep you hydrated, but clears your skin. 22. I know you might want to be tan, but is it really worth being burnt and exposing yourself to all that skin cancer bull shit? No. Use at least SPF 15. It’s not that hard and you’ll still tan. So stop being a brat. 23. You’re allowed to be happy. Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise. 24. Aim to be better, not bitter. 25. Some days are better than others. 26. You can never over pack. Pack what you want. You’ll be glad you have options to choose from. 27. Take those extra hours at work. It’ll be worth it when you see your paycheck. 28. Clean your fucking room and make your bed you slob. It’ll look so much nicer and you’ll feel better you did it. 29. If you have to, make the first move. It’s scary, but someone has to do it. 30. Take plenty of pictures. Of the sunset, your food, your friends, your dog, selfies. Everything. That way, later when you scroll through your camera roll, you’ll remember everything about that day, good or bad.

30 things I learned the year I turned twenty. (via stop-staring)