A Scalding Hot Shower, The Warmth Pelting My Raw Skin, Sounds Appropriate For Not Being Able To Handle

Doesn't matter how much effort I put in, right? It's hard to love me.

you're sweet when you cry, captain. glowing, even.

– ✘

sweet? glowing?

i’m not crying. at least, not anymore

you must be imagining things.

i’m needy. i’m disgusting. i’m useless.

i cry when you leave me alone for too long.

i cry when you praise me, because i don’t deserve it.

i cry when you degrade me, because i feel useless.

i’m such a stupid fucking mutt.

how was your sleep? i hope you are well rested today -⛓

i am quite well rested! i’ve got a somewhat busy day, but i’m ready for the day ahead!

you could be seeing red and all you'll stay being is needy. that's your issue, angel.

– ✘

my issue ? my issue?

why don’t you say these things to my face, jimmy. why are you so intent on making me humiliate myself, more than i already have?

i am never going to be good enough.

you’re going to leave like everyone else.

whether it be because you got bored, or because i upset you, or because you realize i’m just not worth it,

you’re going to leave.

and i’m not ready for you to go just yet…

Call me manipulative, but I want someone to reach their hand out to me when I start to walk away.

I want to feel like I'm worth running after. I want to feel like I'm wanted.

i want to be yours, for you to know who's heart you have been given in a gift wrap box, love letter attached. i still cant bring myself to sign the note metaphorical so i leave a trail of bread crumbs in hopes you notice who i really am, that you wont be able to ignore the similarities and i will have never had to sign the note. its cowardly i know.. but its better then nothing.. -⛓

how sweet, dear. perhaps i might have a clue..

I love obeying, I love taking orders, tell me how to masturbate, tell me what porn I should watch, i'll do anything

i like knowing you'll be there, without fail. i like seeing you sulk about it. it's endearing.

– ✘

it is not endearing. i’m not just some stupid dog, jimmy.