““Can I Call You Her Name?” “That Song Has A Neat And Tidy Story,” Says Turner. “I Was Listening

Looks like a cinnamon roll, could actually kill you: Jamie Cook.

Looks like could kill you, is actually a cinnamon roll: Matt Helders.

Looks like a cinnamon roll and actually is: Nick O'malley.

Looks like a could kill you, but probably prefers to write a song with complicated metaphors about it: Alex Turner.

“It could have been better if we’d have put that picture of Helders in rollerskates on the cover. I like the current one but I sort of wish we’d have done that.” - Alex Turner for NME

Flower princess Alex

10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Alex Turner's track by track of 'WPSIATWIN'

1 THE VIEW FROM THE AFTERNOON “This is one of the last songs written for the album. There’s nothing clever, it’s just about anticipating the evening, finding comfort in familiarity and the fact that you know you’re bound to send a daft message or something before the sun comes up. I think I’ve stopped doing that now.”  2 I BET YOU LOOK GOOD ON THE DANCEFLOOR “I get the impression a lot of people imagine an evening scene when they hear this song but it conjures up daytime images for me. ‘Lustful’ is perhaps a good word to describe it. It’s far from our finest work but I’m not going to bang on about that.”  3 FAKE TALES OF SAN FRANCISCO “We first played this song in 2004 as the summer came to a close. At this time we’d just started playing what then seemed like a lot of gigs – sometimes we’d go mad and play two a week – and so we were rubbing shoulders with a lot of other bands at a similar stage to us. The gigs were usually four bands or sometimes more, no-one in the crowd except a few of their mates or girlfriends who all left as soon as they could. The bands rarely had anything in common, musical or otherwise, and right beside the angry 13-year-olds playing Green Day or whatever you would find the cool bastards that provided the topic for the lyrics of ‘Fake Tales…’. “If it’s a Tuesday night in Sheffield that’s fine, why pretend it’s anything else? I think the easiest way to describe this song is as the sound of us getting annoyed at people pretending. Another way to put it would be it’s the sound of us when given something to whinge about – depends how profound you want it to sound.”  4 DANCING SHOES “It’s the oldest song on there. It’s about people always looking to pull when they go out however much they mask it.”  5 YOU PROBABLY COULDN’T SEE FOR THE LIGHTS BUT YOU WERE STARING STRAIGHT AT ME “I’m into the arrangement on this because there’s no chorus as such and it doesn’t do the same thing more than once. It’s our love song I suppose. It’s about a girl we knew who was in a band.”  6 STILL TAKE YOU HOME  “A while ago, before all this madness, pin-up Jamie Cook and I were sat in a club in town one evening. A conversation was struck up about the clientele of this particular establishment and this little chat and other events that night led to this tune. I remember a dark-haired girl in a green dress was a particular inspiration.”  7 RIOT VAN “This one is a bit against the run of play I suppose, in terms of the time it’s about. I think of most of the songs as being ‘set’ in the present day, whereas with this one it’s more like 1999 or 2000, when we were 14 or so even though it was written at the same time as all the others. ‘Bigger Boys And Stolen Sweethearts’ is set in the same time as this. It’s all about when we used to hang about around our end and the things we saw. We were never really bad lads, we just used to have a laugh. I think Helders [Monkeys drummer] described it best when he said, ‘Just ’cos you’d hang around near people who might burgle houses or summat it didn’t mean you had to.’”  8 RED LIGHT INDICATES DOORS ARE SECURED “It’s about hovercrafts, obviously. We recorded the album in the order it’s presented and did a song a day pretty much. We used a funny microphone called a bullet or something on ‘Riot Van’ and left it up when we went onto ‘Red Light…’ so I could do a guide vocal when we did the take. It turned out the guide sounded great so we didn’t bother doing another in the end. There was a few more verses written for this, but it was all too much and it never got past practice because the same riff was just going round and round with all this verbal on top. Everyone got bored so we cut some stuff out.”  9 MARDY BUM “The hit! This is the only recording that we didn’t do when we did the others. We recorded this one in Munich when we were on tour, in a little studio not too dissimilar to 2Fly studio in Sheffield where we did all our demos.”  10 PERHAPS VAMPIRES IS A BIT STRONG BUT… “About this time last year we’d played outside Sheffield a little and were in the process of just trying to play in new places a little more. You got expenses covered most of the time but that was all – you never made a profit or anything like that. We didn’t really care, we were getting to play and having a laugh and not a great deal of people outside Sheffield had really heard of us so we didn’t expect anything in return. When you talked to people about it however, it was somewhat frowned upon and perhaps sniggered at that we were playing for free. Everyone’s an expert about this band lark and it seemed like a bit of a joke to a lot of people – while they’d wish us all the best I think behind our backs they were really convinced we were just wasting our time.”  11 WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN “We used to have a practice room in an old industrial sort of area just outside town. Loads of bands practice round there and we still do as well. There are sandwich shops and some other businesses that are run there by day. At night, as well as studios and practice rooms there is perhaps some less celebrated activity. When we moved into our room the man next door actually really said, ‘It changes around here when the sun goes down,’ and you would get asked for business [by prostitutes] out in the street sometimes, or it would be the middle of the night and there would be a bloke with a carrier bag just walking about as we left. It sounds like there’s a bit of a humorous tone but it’s really pretty sad. It’s strange how these different worlds exist in the same space.”  12 FROM THE RITZ TO THE RUBBLE “The bouncer thing is really just me having a bit of a dig. I still get asked for ID now when I go to clubs so when I wasn’t actually old enough it was a nightmare trying to get in anywhere at all. I actually had one of the best nights ever after getting turned away once though so it’s not always a bad thing. I remember one night walking from my mate’s house in Hillsborough to get the bus back to ours one Sunday and the second verse and the ‘last night what we talked about’ bit was dreamed up during that journey. We always try to show the same attention to the rhythm and the way the parts work together as we do to the words or any of that stuff. I think this is a good example of when we’ve had a really good crack at both.”  13 A CERTAIN ROMANCE “All our other tunes are quite specific to a certain incident or series of incidents. This one is more reflective and a bit of an attempt at summing up perhaps. This is definitely a special one for us and it could only ever have been the conclusion to the first record. ‘Nobheads don’t dress in a certain way’ is an important theme in there I suppose – at least they don’t where we come from.”

Female artists- 18th and 19th century

I Angelica Kauffmann

II  Eugénie Salanson

III Evelyn de Morgan 

IV Beatrice Offort

V Emma Sandys

VI Henrietta Rae

VII Louis Emile Adan          

VIII Margaret Sarah Carpenter

IX Marie Spartali Stillman

X  Anna Lea Merritt

this is like the i bet you look good on the dancefloor music video but 12 years later

Original cover of ‘umbug