People Don't Talk Enough About How Fucking Funny It Is That Bruce Can Sub In His Kids As Batman When

people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?

More Posts from 754silenceholdswhispers457 and Others

Duke and Jason have been banned from being anywhere near each other in costume because the arguments they will break out into is both too intense and too distracting for patrol. Everyone thinks they're serious but after the first 10-20 times they do it for the love of the game.

Duke: Shut the fuck up.

Jason: You shut the fuck up.

Duke: Zombie

Jason: Flashlight

Duke: That's why the joker still alive

Jason: That's why the joker did what he did to ya mom.

Duke: Nigga where ya mom at? Dea—

Bruce over the comms who, along with the entire bat family has been listening to entire thing: Signal, Red Hood! SPERATE! NOW!

They are now giggling as dick and cass drag them apart.

Timmy in a flowy floor-length gown (think Ethel Cain's white dress) with pearl accessories Bruce gifted him on his birthday

Normal And Legally Distinct Way To Leave A Room

normal and legally distinct way to leave a room

First Page

Page 9 / Page 11

“so what’s your favorite batfam trope?”

“bruce calling his kids sweetheart/sweetie/baby/any petname”

“what—“

-

Dick, accidentally scraping his knee: ow

Bruce, worried: you okay, dear?

Dick, a 30 year old man:

Dick, tearing up: no…

Cass: 😐

Cass: *period cramp*

Cass: 😐

Bruce, knocking on her door: cass?

Cass, suddenly on the floor curled up and sniffling: dad, period hurts 😢

Bruce, slamming the door open, picking his daughter up then tucking her back in her bed: i’m sorry baby. i’m here now, what do you need?

Red Robin, cranky and stressed, having been awake for 120 hours: ugh! why can’t you people do anything right!?

Wonder Girl, also sleep deprived: you arrogant piece of—

Red Robin, suddenly walking away, grabbing his civilian phone: *angrily dials a number*

Bruce, in a WE meeting, answering: hello? tim?

Red Robin, voice breaking: dad?

Bruce:

Batman, requesting access to Mount Justice:

Superboy, eye bags darker than black: what’s batman doing here

Red Robin, packing up, speed walking out the door:

Batman, out of sight: oh, don’t cry sweetie, let’s go home hm?

Bruce, washing the dishes:

Damian, entering the room: baba?

Bruce, smiling: yes?

Damian, shuffling towards him, holding something behind his back:

Bruce: what do you have there?

Damian, embarrassed but determined, holds up a drawing of him and Bruce:

Bruce:

Bruce, tears streaming down his face: it’s beautiful habibi

Bruce: *sleeping*

Jason:

Jason: b

Bruce: ?!

Bruce: j-jay?

Bruce: what are you- oh.

Jason, laying next to him, face hidden in his chest: fuck you.

Bruce:

Jason:

Jason, quietly: i take it back. love you…dad.

Bruce, crying again: i love you too, sweetheart

-

now with a part 2!

bonus: captain marvel

Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath part 5 (TW: Gore, panic attack)

Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)
Mute B-127 AU: The Aftermath Part 5 (TW: Gore, Panic Attack)

Part 10 of the "Mute B-127 AU" comic series!

I told myself I'd try to spend less time drawing every single panel. You might have guessed it did not work out XD Once again, thank you so much for your patience <3

Finally, a Bee focused update! I do apologise, he's NOT getting any comfort in a while :< We're getting close to a two-part "episode" that I'm very excited about. Hopefully I can draw it as I imagine

First >> Prev >> Next (around 18th of April)

If you like my art and want to support me, I have a shop at Ko-fi!

Please don't repost my art on other platforms.

Notes:

If it's not clear - Bee saw his own reflection in the metal surface of the wall. It's the first time he's seen his own face, and on top of that he must have gotten terrible flashbacks to Sentinel and the assault. Ratchet really shouldn't have left him alone.

This update is happening right before the previous one, in which Bee stumbles into Elita-1. Optimus and Ratchet are still talking, somewhere else.

And finally, a little more explanation about the injury - Bee's neck got terribly damaged by Sentinel. He subconsciously put his mask on right after that, I assume the whole mechanism was destroyed and took off a part of his faceplate with it. Even before Ratchet could help him he was already grabbing at his injuries. In the IDW comics there is something about a rust disease? Hence the idea his face could have gotten infected, if not taken care of immediately. Ratchet had to pry his faceplate open, repaired the injuries and the mask itself, and let Bee put it on again, for protection.

Did I plan this from the beginning? ....................................*cough*

He Is Immune To The Plot
He Is Immune To The Plot
He Is Immune To The Plot
He Is Immune To The Plot
He Is Immune To The Plot
He Is Immune To The Plot

He is immune to the plot

Credits to @sreppub’s Goobins AU.

Batman #69

Batman #69

Bane, why are you naked and kneeling on top of the alternate version of Bruce's dad while you say both Batmans are yours?? that's suspicious

Izuku Saw Some Terrible Things On That Battlefield....
Izuku Saw Some Terrible Things On That Battlefield....
Izuku Saw Some Terrible Things On That Battlefield....

Izuku saw some terrible things on that battlefield....

tim: i know i was horrible to you before, and i’m really sorry. i understand you may not forgive me, and i don’t deserve to be forgiven, but i really do like you and swear i’ve worked on myself and changed-

tam: is your sister seeing anyone

Why Would You Kill Him Like This…
Why Would You Kill Him Like This…
Why Would You Kill Him Like This…

Why would you kill him like this…

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