do you ever want to check up on someone but it’s just not ur place anymore
Stahp.😂😂😂
Mom: You're still playing that Skyrim game?
Me: Hey, I'm taking advantage of winter break. Besides, this is a cool game. Like, I can kill dragons, do magic, get married, join factions-
Dad: *from across the room* Get married?
Me: Yeah. And buy houses, too. I can even marry a woman. Like, I could marry my housecarl if I wanted.
Mom: Your what?
Me: Lydia. My housecarl.
Dad: Which is...?
Me: Um, she fights with me, carries my stuff-
Mom: So she's a slave?
Me: ...
Me: No.
Mom: She sounds like a slave.
Dad: What's this about you marrying a slave?
Mom: She's really a slave, right?
Me:
Mom: It seems like a failure of ethics to force your slave to marry you.
Me: But I'm not forcing her to marry me! Once I put on the Amulet of Mara she gets interested in me all on her own!
Dad: So, what, you're not attractive until you put on a fancy-dancy necklace and then force your slave to marry you?
Dad: We've raised her wrong. Keeping a slave, making her do all the dirty work, and then forcing her to get married? Incredible.
Dad: And I suppose then you force her to live with you, too.
Me:
Me:
Me: Fine, then, I'll marry Aela.
Mom: Who's Aela? Another slave?
Me: No, a werewolf. A Companion.
Dad: *throws magazine onto floor* BESTIALITY?
Mom: You're going to marry a wolf? You gonna enslave her too?
Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: So can I go back to campus now, or do I have to live with this for the next forever and a half?
Dad:
Mom:
Dad:
Mom: *walking into the kitchen with her hands on her head* We've raised a lesbian slave-owner who regularly commits bestiality.
Dad: She's your daughter.
I stopped breathing for a moment.😂
can they like release new vegetables
me: im so happy with my life right now
stress:
Aye, just your average incarnation of a jungle cat who likes to nap. This be my blog where I share the thingys I feel are funny or hella relevant.✌🏾
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